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Lomelindi_of_Moonlight
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Post Gilraen's happiness
on: September 29, 2006 04:58
Arathorn son of Arador wanted to marry Gilraen.

Dírhael, her father was at first against it, but then consented after his wife Ivorwen convinced him it was best.

Hypothetical question:

Was Gilraen, mother of Aragorn, happy with the match? It seems (to me) to be an arranged marriage of a young girl to a man full of hard years from the short passage in the LoTR Appendixes. I may be wrong, but perhaps she wasn't all-fired to get married young to a man that her parents figured wouldn't live much longer. And after he did die and she was widowed, did she begruge their decision or no?

*This is probably completely crazy to post, but it just popped in my head one time when I was reading the story of Aragorn and Arwen*
Ilandir
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: September 29, 2006 08:15
Hi Lomelindi,

Good point your raise there heh! I've also read and re-read the Tale of Aragorn and Arwen in the LOTR Appendix, but I've never thought of such thing.

As far as I can remember, Tolkien doesn't give us much information on the contact between Arathorn and Gilraen. If we take into consideration the fact that she was forced to marry him at a young age, until he died, she would have become in-love with him.

And if we take into consideration that she loved him from the beginning, obviously, she did begruge his death and maybe tried to raise Aragorn in the best way like his father.

Hope that helped abit!

Thanks,
Ilandir
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Celebrian
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: September 30, 2006 03:54
I never got the feeling she was forced, rather the reverse, in fact. Her father was against it at first but then agreed. I always assumed it was because they were very much in love, as their son would eventually love a woman whose father was not happy about the situation.
Lomelindi_of_Moonlight
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: October 01, 2006 08:18
I never got the feeling she was forced, rather the reverse, in fact. Her father was against it at first but then agreed. I always assumed it was because they were very much in love, as their son would eventually love a woman whose father was not happy about the situation.


Very good point Celebrian. Could it be possible that Tolkien didn't dwell on their love or marriage because he knew it would interfere with the events between Aragorn and Arwen?

There's just one thing I can't seem to get over and that is how Gilraen died hopeless and worn down with life. Could that have been the result of a foresighted and short-lived marriage as well as the evil brooding in the East?
hobbitnamedeliza
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: October 01, 2006 06:16
I would tend to think that Gilraen did not object to the match...although I do think it's possible that she did not actively seek it. She seems to adhere to the "wisdom" of arranged marriages, avoiding to problematic issues that arise from seeking marriages based on love. She points out to Aragorn that he will have great difficulty if he follows that path.

Did she love her husband? I think it is probable that she came to love him. She certainly loved his son and reverenced his memory.
ArFeiniel
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: October 02, 2006 09:52
I don't think Gilraen objected to the match (unless, of course, she was in love with someone else her own age). Even if she was not "in love with" Arathorn at the time of their marriage, the way she was raised would've made her respect him and almost hold him in awe as a good man and a great leader whom any woman should be proud to marry. Those feelings could easily turn into love. As would the fact that he chose her above all others.

It would be an exciting, (and frightening) prospect as well, I would imagine, to know the resposibility that one would take on in becoming the wife of the leader of a nation. In addition, to know that, in all likelihood, one will become the mother of the heir of the leadership of that same nation, would be a wonderful and terrifying thing to look forward to.

So, I'm not sure if she really had much of an opinion either way. From Gilraen's point of view, there would be good and bad reasons to marry Arathorn, but either way, she could be happy.
WillowByTheWater
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: October 17, 2006 09:48
I've always wondered about Gilraen and Arathorn - never really understood what was happening.
rethe25
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: October 20, 2006 08:15
This is really interesting and it makes me want to learn/delve deeper for more info. Thanks for the food for thought Lomelindi maybe i may find something in HoME (Peoples of Middle Earth)???? goes to look.......
arwen_telcontari
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: November 12, 2006 06:05
I personally think that Gilraen had foresight, even if it happened at random moments like with her mother, so I think she knew what she was getting into and was not afraid to marry Arathorn.
As other people have brought up, she may not have been "in love" with him at the time, but it was certainly not something she would have been opposed to. Hope this helps!
Rhia
Rulea
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: November 25, 2006 05:03
I belive she was happy, but maybe a little unhappy because she felt it was her duty to marry Arathorn because she was to bear a child who would basically save thier race.
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cirdaneth
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Post RE: Gilraen's happiness
on: January 21, 2011 11:29
A personal note here which may help. I was fostered after my father's death by some posh friends of his and in 1961 was persuaded to marry at 18 (therefore still legally a minor) a man 9 years my senior. I asked my foster-mother if it mattered that I wasn't in love with him and she replied that marriage was about sensible decisions and love would come later. It did ... for my part, but unfortunately was not mutual.

I believe that Gilraen's bonding to Arathorn may have been similar. It may also have an element of 'vision and purpose'. In a later relationship I threw my lot in with someone from mutual necessity and we bonded because we believed passionately in something we wanted to create, and we succeeded.
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