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findemaxam48
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on: May 21, 2015 05:00
Elnath, it looks pretty good. It may be just me, but I find the whole "discover that you're a princess" route a bit cliche. But, do not let that hinder you. It has been done before and can be done again. Just be sure that you add something into your writing that separates you from everyone else. I really like Oliver as well. Oh, and just a technical thing. When writing dialogue, your quotations should look "like this" and not 'like this.' When you are quoting something that somebody said, this is what it would look like: "He told me, 'never do that again.'" Make sense?

PSK, do not be so hard on yourself. You will never be any good at writing anything if you don't try, man.

I am also currently accepting titles for my fourth book in my series. You all know my writing style and a good chunk about the series. This will be the last book in the series *sobs* so I would like the title to be particularly profound.

The first book is titled "Envisage", the second "Sacrifice," and the third, "Enigma." (See my signature.) I prefer one word titles the best. Any thoughts?
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
PSK
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on: May 21, 2015 05:28
Yeah Elnath, although the concept in itself is not so original, possibly the way you do it could be. Maybe get rid of the last line and take out that PRINCESS? bit. Perhaps if you built the fact that she was royal into the story slowly, so she didn't just go oh my god I'm a princess it would work better. But then again I have no idea where you want to take your work, what audience you are writing for, the scale of her realm, how important each character actually is etc etc. I think in order to give a proper detailed feedback we would need to know all of those things.

Maxie, I appreciate the encouragement very much, and I certainly will be trying different things if you set them as prompts. They will always have a death though...

Ooh just noticed that quote in your sig. I like!
"Tears unnumbered ye shall shed; and the Valar will fence Valinor against you, and shut you out, so that not even the echo of your lamentation shall pass over the mountains." ~ The Doom of Mandos
findemaxam48
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on: May 21, 2015 05:50
Thank you for reiterating PSK! Sometimes I have no idea how to say stuff, but somehow I can almost hear you talking the above out.

Thank you. I try to write nice quotes, and some turn out better than others.

Another thing, Elnath...is she happy to be a princess? My MC despises her royal position and does everything she can to not do her job. She's lazy, ignores people, and has a wicked attitude. Maybe you can make her kind of wary about her new job.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BelleBayard
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on: May 21, 2015 11:05
Great advice, folks! I agree, you have to write to write better. You don't want to know how many times professionals rewrite and revise till their eyes bleed. Some of it self-inflicted, but editors will also tell you to change things. Always good to have more than one set of eyes, but even then, a fresh set is good because I will never forget reading an Indian romance (yeah, Native American, but back then it was Indian) and the heroine was thinking about the powerful buffalo stag... Errr... no... That was probably a herd of deer and the editor suggested buffalo instead, but somehow they missed changing it to bull and it made it to print. *cringe* A very wise romance writer once said, "Nothing is set in stone until you print it. Then every flaw stands out in neon" or something to that effect. In other words, if you revise and reread, and have someone else read it, revise again, you might want more than one person to read it because those who know what to expect may read what they believe should be there, but it isn't. Make sense?
Elnath
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on: May 21, 2015 11:27
PSK-
I am planning it a little more than drafting it. I have it all planned, I am just too lazy to actually type it up.

Well, about the whole princess cliche, Sara doesn't think she is up to being one. like, she just isn't worthy enough. (The first book is mainly about her realizing that she is able to do what everyone expects of her. She has low self-esteem, so the first book is a more inward battle, with some physical problems, then the second book focuses on some more physical problems, than inward problems. The third book is where the journey comes to a close. The third book actually takes a time jump.

So, yes it might be a cliche, but I am not basing the books only on the fact she didn't know she was a princess. It is about her finding who she is, rather than what she is. This is actually one of my earlier drafts that I shared with you guys, so I think I changed a bit. (Can't seem to find my other drafts...)

And thank you for the wonderful advice, guys! I am very thankful for it.

ALso, I told my best friend all about my story, spoilers and all, and who is destined to die in the most beautiful of ways, and she started crying. It was great.
Because, yes, I like killing off characters to make people sad.

Hey, I also wrote a short story, about the size of the excerpt, anyone want to read it?
It was based off a prompt.


Two of my characters for the novel series that haven't been introduced yet
Image
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[Edited on 05/22/2015 by Elnath]
Annog nin daf pladan tele ci?
findemaxam48
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on: May 21, 2015 12:58
If you ever seek publication, though, Elnath, no would be wary. Have you ever heard of the Princess Diaries? They were movies too, with Anne Hathaway and Julie Andrews. The whole premise of the series is a girl who discovers Her royal position and tries to navigate that as well as the social and mental problems she faces in school. I don't know if your series takes place in the modern world or not, but it is still very similar.

Editing and revising is hard. I am writing my third book as well as my first because I have so much fixing to do. I created my characters and the basic story line when I was nine. I'm seventeen and a half now. I never gave up on my characters and the world they live in, and look at me now. I am basing my college career off of writing. I ask applying to school with my first four book chapters. I am going to be published. I will spend the rest of my life writing and editing. All of this from a nine year old's half notebook story about a queen who had a bad dream.

Bottom line: no matter how mainstream you feel you are, or how much work needs to be done, stay with your stories. You never know.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: May 21, 2015 01:10
Wow. What great advice to us all, Maxie! If only I could actually work on something other than fanfics!
I don't have much to update. I don't think I'm going to make it through this month's mini NaNo; I'm at 11,801 words & have run out of ideas that I can use to up my word count.
Here is my second prompt. This is actually a two for one, so you get to see me writing from a male viewpoint! If any of you have read my fanfic The Handsome Sleeper, I revised it a bit & changed a few things, mainly in I think the second chapter. And yes, it's a Sleeping Beauty spinoff!

~
I loved him the minute I laid eyes on him. Those flowing, flaxen locks cascading down his strong, young shoulders and back, those beautiful cornflower blue eyes, all peeking out from a well-defined face made up the physical form of young Prince Thranduil, only son of Oropher. However, I knew there had to be much more to him than just his handsome features. One can imagine how thrilled yet saddened I was when he fell into the Enchanted River and became entranced in a deep sleep. I say this not because I wished the sorcery upon him but rather because I, out of all the elves, was chosen to attend him! While I mainly kept to the kitchens, I had always been interested in healing and they gave me a chance to practice my nursing skills on him. It ended up that I kept him fed and covered in his blankets, while some male servants attended to any more personal needs. Much of the day I simply sat by his side, reading or singing to him in hopes he would wake up. Then one day, his dainty white foot poked out from under the covers just as I had filled my hands with dirty dishes to return to the kitchens. Afraid he might be able to catch a chill, I slid his foot back underneath the covers, my fingers brushing his sole. A soft chuckle met my ear and I knew it did not come from my own mouth. Curious, I tickled his foot again, and looked at the Prince’s face. Behold! He smiled, chuckling in his sleep yet looking closer to waking than I had ever seen him. Curious to see if my theory would work, I tickled him even more until he laughed hard enough to force tears down that beautiful face of his.
“Stop!” he finally choked out through his laughter.
I immediately did so, holding my sides as they hurt from my raucous display of mirth, and he opened his gorgeous cornflower eyes to stare at me. "Prince Thranduil! You are awake at last! I shall fetch your parents right away!" I exclaimed, embarrassed for some reason.
"Wait, don't leave! Who are you and what are you doing in my room, acting all excited that I am awake? Has something happened?"
I laughed again; the confusion on his face made him even more endearing. "I'm Arabesque. We have never formally met since I work for King Oropher in the kitchens. You fell into the Enchanted River a hundred years ago and have been asleep until just now. I was put in charge of making sure you got your nourishment during your convalescence."
"Oh my! Please come closer; I do not wish to be alone." I obliged and he took my hand, looking solemnly into my eyes, which made my insides squirm as though they teemed with a million fish, yet not in an unpleasant way. I suppose awaking to find you’ve been asleep a full century is rather stressful, so of course I needed to oblige him and explain things more.
He gently squeezed my hand as he spoke, sending a pleasant shiver down my spine. "Thank you for caring for me. And you found my cure! How can I ever repay you?"
"I was only doing my duty. Your father makes sure I have enough to eat and I have the loveliest room. I do not need anything else."
"Well, at any rate I would like to get to know you better."
My heart stopped beating. The Elvenprince wanted to be friends with me, a lowly kitchen maid? Did I hear him right?
At this point, the king and queen came bursting into the room. Someone had heard our laughter and sent for them.
"My son, my son! You are awake!" cried Oropher.
Bannostadeth asked me how it happened, so I explained everything.
"Arabesque, you shall be greatly rewarded for this! Tell me, what should you like in the entire kingdom?" King Oropher was feeling very generous towards me for some reason, even though I knew I really had not done much at all.
"Oh no, your Highness! I do not need anything else; you have already provided me with so much! Besides, seeing the joy of a reunited family is the only reward I need," I replied, quite embarrassed at all the fuss over me. The cure was completely accidental and I needed no repayment. Any of the elves in the whole land would have given their lives if only their prince would be saved by it. Besides, the payment I desired was impossible for me to have.
"Nonsense! I'll tell you what; you shall be promoted to the status of a lady. I shall provide all the fancy clothes you need and anything else you might want. You will never need to work in the kitchens again. I know you play the flute but are unable to practice often due to your duties. Now you will have time for that and can play for us with the other musicians, if you wish."
My eyes shone from sheer joy. I’d always dreamed of attending a dance as both a musician and a dancer. "Thank you so much! Will I be allowed to attend the balls to dance as well as play?"
"Most certainly!" the king and queen replied together.
“I also desire to learn from your best healers.”
They smiled their approval, then Thranduil piped up. "I'd love to dance with you at our next ball! Will you do me the honour of the first dance?"
I looked to the royal couple to seek their approval. Bannostadeth nodded in agreement. "I would be honoured, your Majesty!"
"Come now, at this point I see no more need of formality. Call me Thranduil."
"All right then, your – I mean Thranduil!" I found myself feeling suddenly shy around him. Although I knew it not, my love for him began in full that day and I had no idea how to handle those emotions. Actually, I suspected the prince experienced similar feelings from the way he looked at me with a hint of longing in those big, beautiful eyes. It seemed as though he wanted to know what kind of elleth would willingly care for him all those years. However, I knew the family needed some time to reunite and I needed time to sort out my own emotions. "I shall go and tell my family the good news, if you all will excuse me!"
"Go right ahead! We shall see you later!" All three royals replied at once, happy to be together again.
I fled the room, hoping to escape the fantasies that threatened to plague my mind. Thranduil was even more enchanting awake, and I was scared of the emotional state jumbling my insides.
I’m sure you are wondering just how long it took him to realize I loved him and he loved me. Actually, a few hundred long years is your answer. During that time we got to know each other and became the best of friends, inseparable companions who spoke with each other daily. The more I knew of him, the deeper my love grew. I think he knew all along that we were destined for each other yet feared he missed something, although what I am not sure. At last, he asked me to marry him, and of course I agreed. We’ve been together ever since, my best friend and I, although we are so much more to each other. Even our precious, beloved son Legolas will never have the same place in my heart that my dearest Thranduil has.
~
Thranduil strode into the room, royal robes swinging majestically. “What are you doing?” he inquired.
Smiling, Arabesque beckoned him over. “I’ve been writing our love story to give to Legolas.” She handed him the papers. “Be careful. They are still wet.”
Holding the documents far from his garments, he strolled as he read through them. After several minutes, he carefully laid them on the table and placed his arms around his precious wife. “I love you, Meleth!” Nuzzling her nose, he closed his eyes and captured her soft, full lips in a tender kiss.
Sighing in content, she leaned against him, placing a gentle hand on his strong chest. “And I love you,” she murmured between caresses.
A few minutes later, the Elvenking drew back. “Now I would like to write my own version of the story!”
“I think that’s a lovely plan!” She smiled as he sat at her desk and grabbed the goose quill.
~
The sensation of falling washed over me, then a chill ran down my spine as water covered me. Shivering, I could not wake up. I only knew something warm carried me. As if I floated among the clouds, softness upheld me as I heard a lovely voice speaking and singing to me. Soft hands touched mine, and something wet passed through my lips. Surely I had died and one of the Valar tenderly cared for me. That voice…perhaps it belonged to Nessa? While not unpleasant, the ethereal visions flashed in my mind for such a long time. Then, a foreign object touched my foot, one I knew did not belong in the wonderful imagery to which I had become accustomed and learned to love.
The nasty thing touching my foot tickled, and I found myself laughing. As I allowed my mirth to spill out, I drifted back into reality, slowly floating down from the heavenly places in which I flew. I opened my eyes and blinked. Surely this lovey creature was Nessa herself, come down to see me safely to wherever I belonged. All my memories rushed back to me, overwhelming my mind. Then she said something about leaving me, so of course I needed to detain this lovely personage. I looked into her pale blue eyes, wondering how any lady could be this lovely and not be a Valar, for somehow my instinct said she was a mere elf, although I protested to myself.
Then, she smiled at me. “Arabesque.” The name rolled off her lips like melted butter dripping onto a hot lemon scone. As she laughed, soft music tinkled inside my head, filling my heart with joy. I had to touch her, to feel that she was real. As I took her hand, its rough redness seemed to me more beautiful than the soft, tender hand I had expected. Her musical voice tickled my ears as we spoke.
My parents came bursting into the room, interrupting the intimate moment I shared with this goddess. Someone had heard our laughter and sent for them. However, I knew they needed to make sure I was safe and recovered, just as I needed to be reunited with them.
After a pleasant conversation, I had to make sure Lady Arabesque would come into my presence once more, so I asked her to dance with me at the ball. My heart pounded as I awaited her reply, and she finally agreed. I could not contain the wide grin that sprang across my face.
I found it rather humorous that my parents insisted I rest when they informed me I had been asleep the past century. My dreams took me once more to high and lofty places. However, a face connected itself to the lovely voice which spoke and sang to me.
~
Waiting for the dance proved to be torture on my part. I saw no more of Arabesque until that evening. There she allowed me to dance with her several times over the course of the night. I would have held her in my arms, gently swaying to the music, all the night long. However, I understood she had her duties and I let her attend them. Whenever she came to me and placed her right hand in my left, her left hand on my shoulder, I knew Nessa herself could not fit better in my embrace nor move her feet so expertly across the floor.
That night caused me to dream of marriage and I knew it was time I found someone with whom to share the rest of my life. However, my fear that I was unworthy of this beautiful being caused me to wait centuries before making my move. During that time, my sweet Arabesque became my best friend, the one I longed to spend time with on a daily basis, the one I missed most whenever she left the room.
I regret I waited so long to ask her to marry me. However, the years we’ve had together have proved to be sweet enough to make up the difference. She is the one who has been there for me in my darkest moments, actively loving me even when I have been such a pain and could not properly show her my own love. When the dragon gave me my scars, she was there for me. She told me that even though I thought my scars hideous, to her they became beautiful because I attained them while saving her.
Surely the Valar have truly blessed me to give me such an amazing, wonderful Elvenqueen as my beloved wife.
~
Thranduil laid the quill on the table after dabbing the ink off with a splotched cloth. Looking over his shoulder the whole time, Arabesque leaned over and pressed her cheek to his, encircling him with her arms. Smiling, he got up and she pulled him around to face her. “You are precious, my Meleth! I love you.” He snuggled against her and closed his eyes, their lips passionately meeting once more. His right hand trailed along her face and worked its way into her hair, caressing the soft tresses as they kissed. Their deep bond of love became affirmed by the physical touch, such a small portion in their life together.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
Elnath
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on: May 21, 2015 02:53
It is not on our world so it has its own time period. But much like medieval times...
I hear what you're saying, but I still think that I will attempt to make something new come out of it.
I have had this storyline for six years now I believe.

Perhaps this book shall take on another storyline, who knows? I shall go where my characters lead me. The more I write, the more I know them.
Annog nin daf pladan tele ci?
findemaxam48
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on: May 21, 2015 08:39
Blue, very nice! I have never read a Thranduil fanfic where he was younger before.

We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: May 22, 2015 12:35
Thanks! I love writing about him in any stage of life. He's actually more of a boy in the beginning of the story. And he's my only male character that I feel comes out perfectly. I wish I could figure out why that is!
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
PSK
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on: May 22, 2015 12:40
Very good Blue. I like some of the descriptions like the hair cascading. Oh good old Arabesque
"Tears unnumbered ye shall shed; and the Valar will fence Valinor against you, and shut you out, so that not even the echo of your lamentation shall pass over the mountains." ~ The Doom of Mandos
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: May 22, 2015 02:56
Thanks! Arabesque is also quite a character
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: May 22, 2015 05:37
OK guys, here goes my romance story. These are two of my secondary characters...and this is not a romantic love.

___

I put my head into my hands and try to focus. The temptation to pinch my earlobe or something, hard, just to keep my attention where it should be, is overwhelming. The sounds in the room overwhelm me, trying to compete with the voices in my head. I clench my knife and look upwards to stretch my neck.

No one talks to me. No one listens to me. And that is because I screwed up. I had a plan and it failed. I had people killed as they flailed about, trying to defend me and the land that I stand on. I would be surprised if I don't get assassinated before the day is out. Or at the least, thrown out of my own country. Jed would be so mad at me. He doesn't work well with Susanna, who will glide into my position once I am out of the picture.

Something slams in the background. Shouting, crying fills the air as news is delivered. I cover my mouth as tears start to flow out of my eyes.

I cry like I never have before. Silent, but hunched over like I was hit in the stomach. My throat hurts from the force of thousands of emotions crumbling into the air.

Someone touches my knee. I look up, and there is my little niece, holding something in her hand.

"Hi, auntie," Arna whispers hoarsely.

"Arna," I sniff, wiping my nose on my sleeve. "You shouldn't be in here."

"I know. Gabriel is talking to some important men, so I thought I would come sit with you. Because you are upset," she tells me seriously. She inches up onto my lap and curls up under my chin. "It's okay. You're my favorite aunt."

Her childlike conviction makes me sob harder. Arna pats my back awkwardly and whispers, "Shh." She stays firmly on my lap even as people give me dirty looks and glares. My older brother comes by and, completely skipping over me for the time being, says, "Arna? You're suppost to be in bed. Let's go."

Arna shakes her head. "I want to stay," she says stubbornly.

Gabe lets it go. There's no use arguing with her. I try to swipe tears away again, but Arna beats me to it. "It's okay," She says quietly. "I still love you."

We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: May 22, 2015 06:15
Maxie, Arna is adorable! I can tell she knew exactly what your MC needed to hear. I love it when children have that innocent intuition at times, like in Despicable Me with the girls.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: May 22, 2015 06:26
Thank you! She was the most difficult character for me to write, since she is so radically different from the others.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
Elnath
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on: May 22, 2015 06:34
Here is a short story I wrote.
There is a myth told to us of a mystical enchantress. Whether you choose to believe it or
not, I believe it is true. It was back when magic ruled the land. There was a library full of
spellbooks. One of those books was so sacred that it was held under full protection. It had
the most powerful spells in it. No one knows why or how she did it, but she somehow
stole the sacred book. No one has seen her since, and no one knows who this enchantress
is, but she left a note behind. The note said:

'If you want to find me,
There is something you must do,
Where the wind blows through the tree,
And the pixies watch over you,

You must look for the mark,
While you still can do so,
For if light fades to dark,
Then the mark will no longer show,

I am hidden away,
In something held under,
When it is no longer day,
You will only be left to wonder,

The mark shows the door,
And it leads to me,
It would be a chore,
If you don't have the key,

Where old trees are all around,
Where they never cease to grow,
Deep in the forest with no sound,
Where no one dares go,

It is placed in a hole,
In the oldest oak,
To get what I stole,
Be careful who you evoke,

For the being I enchanted,
Is very capable indeed,
Admittance is rarely granted,
To take the key you need,


When you unlock my hideaway,
Of this you must beware,
If the right path you stray,
You will reach my lair,

There I will enchant you,
To do my every whim,
If you chose the right path to walk through,
Then your chances of success aren't slim,

If you make it this far,
All that's left to do,
Head to where you see the star,
Before the goblins find you,

Past the star and the goblins,
There you will find the book,
Beware of the web the spider spins,
To reach what has been took,

When you reach your goal,
Don’t turn back from where you came,
Continue on or lose your soul,
If I hear that you're to blame,

For trespassing where I stay,
I will surely make you regret,
Coming there that day,
For I will make you my eternal pet.'

No one has yet found her lair that we know of, but one day, I want to find it. I have narrowed the places her lair could be to a few areas, but I have not had any
luck yet. I just know I will find it!

It was inspired by a prompt, and I do not see myself expanding it.
It was just something I wanted to write instead of worrying only about my novel series.

I have a few fanfictions that I have been meaning to write, but I just haven't the time to write much anymore. Jobs can be quite interfering when you want to write.
Annog nin daf pladan tele ci?
findemaxam48
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on: May 22, 2015 11:41
I like it, Elnath.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
Edhelharn
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on: May 24, 2015 03:23
I think you could take this pretty far, Elnath!

And hi. I suppose I'm a bit late to the party?
Image Image Love is the strongest force the world possesses - Mahatma Gandhi
Eruwestiel_Evensong
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on: May 25, 2015 02:55
I haven't had time to read all the other prompts but I really like yours, Elnath!

I am still working on the falling sky prompt. It should be finished soon.
"And I dreamed of seas and ships, and of waves crashing on the shore in the twilight of the world..." ~Song, member of the Realm of Ulmo
findemaxam48
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on: May 25, 2015 08:41
Same for me, Song. I just tied it in to my third book...

Sorry that I didn't post the prompyprompt yesterday. I went on a unplanned road trip. I will post it later.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
findemaxam48
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on: May 26, 2015 04:28
Prompt Number 41:

I clench the flowers in my hand.

Tip Tuesday: Describe your characters clothing when you change a setting or reach a turning point. Sometimes with just a simple wardrobe change, the audience is paying attention to what ia going on and why there is a change.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: May 26, 2015 04:36
Interesting prompt! I hope I can get something with this one; I'm already seeing it in the male perspective for some reason!
I don't go into detail about my character's clothing or looks on a regular basis, but part of that is where I tend to only get inspiration on fanfics & everyone already knows what the clothes are like. I'm wondering if I should start doing that, since clothing interests me anyway.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
Eruwestiel_Evensong
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on: May 26, 2015 07:22
Prompt 41

Elma used her small hands and feet to pull herself over the large boulders. "Just a little farther." Her muscles ached terribly by the time she reached the top of what she had long before deemed "the mountain". It was really just a large heap of dirt and rocks left by whoever had built the small town she lived in. The mountain provided a good view of the rolling countryside with its groves of trees and quaint huts. But the little girl was here for another reason. At the beginning of spring a few delicate blue flowers grew at the very top of the mountain. She had discovered them while hiking with her father.

The small figure knelt to carefully pick a small handful of fragrant blossoms, the bright sun reflecting off her long golden hair. "Mama will love these." She picked the last flower and pulled the faded purple ribbon from her hair, tying it around the bouquet. Swinging her legs over a smooth boulder, the girl began her descent, clenching the flowers in one hand. Halfway down the hillside she stretched her leg down for another foothold, but only met air. Her other foot slipped and she had to clutch the boulder with both hands. It was only after she slipped down to the next rock that she realized the precious flowers were gone.

Scrambling down, not caring that she scraped her hands and knees on the sharp rocks, Elma searched for her lost prize. The sun was sinking lower in the sky and she knew she should go home, but didn't want to leave without the flowers. She searched until the sun set and it was too dark to see. Then the little girl sat down and cried. So few things made her mother smile since Elma's father had been killed in a mining accident. The flowers would have made her smile - they always did. And now they were gone for good.

A lantern bobbed up the road and came up over the rocks.
"Elma, thank goodness I found you!" The lantern revealed her mother's relieved face as she rushed to her daughter's side. "Darling, what are doing out here? I was so worried when you didn't come home." She hugged Elma close, then gasped at the blood on the girl's arms and legs. "What happened? Did someone hurt you?" Elma was shaking her head. "No one hurt me. I...I wanted to bring you the flowers papa and I used to gather. I dropped them when I lost my balance coming down."
Her mother shook her head in wonder. "Elma, why so much trouble for a few flowers?"
The girl looked down at her feet. "You never smile anymore since papa died. I wanted to make you happy."

Elma felt her mother's tears wet her hair. "You have made me happy. You make me happy every day just by being my daughter. The flowers were a nice reminder of your father and the fun times we shared as a family. But you are a better reminder. It was never the flowers I really loved to see. What made me smile was the joy on your face when you brought them to me." she hugged her daughter tightly. "I love you."

"I love you too, mama." The girl hugged her mother back, then after a moment looked up and stared in amazement.
The brightest smile in all the world lit her mother's face.

[Edited on 05/26/2015 by Eruwestiel_Evensong]
"And I dreamed of seas and ships, and of waves crashing on the shore in the twilight of the world..." ~Song, member of the Realm of Ulmo
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: May 26, 2015 07:30
Song, your prompt is beautiful! I love how hard little Elma works just to get a smile from her mom. That's precious.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: May 26, 2015 08:38
Song, that was beautiful! Question for you, do you have these charactera stored up and then do you use them for the prompts, pr do you create them especially for the prompts?
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BelleBayard
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on: May 26, 2015 10:21
Wow, Song... That was very well done. Brought tears to my eyes. We have a lot of talented people here!
findemaxam48
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on: May 26, 2015 10:24
We so do. I love seeing everybody's work here, week after week.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
Eruwestiel_Evensong
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on: May 26, 2015 10:51
My, I was not expecting so much positive feedback! Thank you all so much, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Maxie, I generally just come up with the characters on the spot. A name just pops into my head and the character is created. Or I write a character with no name, as my next prompt will show.
"And I dreamed of seas and ships, and of waves crashing on the shore in the twilight of the world..." ~Song, member of the Realm of Ulmo
Edhelharn
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on: May 26, 2015 02:59
... sorry... Am I still allowed to join?
Image Image Love is the strongest force the world possesses - Mahatma Gandhi
BelleBayard
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on: May 26, 2015 10:23
Absolutely! Maxie usually puts up the prompts and anyone who has the time/inclination can chime in.
findemaxam48
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on: May 27, 2015 04:40
Yup! Even I get here late sometimes. We do different prompts each week and have advice and updates on the other days.

Tech Wednesday:

Well, this app is great for NaNo people. Its called WrimoCompanion. It syncs up to your NaNoWriMo account and you are able to update your word count there. Only downside is that the only time it really works is in November for NaNo.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
Elnath
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on: May 27, 2015 11:27
Hmm... I came up with a prompt the other day but I forgot it.
As usual.

You guys are all so good at writing!

Thanks for the compliments, guys! It makes me happy knowing I'm not completely incompetent at writing.
Annog nin daf pladan tele ci?
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: May 27, 2015 11:53
Here's this week's prompt! Once again, it contains spoilers for both parts 3 and 4 of Mushus's & my miniseries. And as I suspected, it does indeed come from the male perspective!

~
Arathorn trotted off on Rûthfuin, glancing back to exchange waves with his father. He spent the first hour of the journey mulling over his latest conversation with his father, he eventually concluded Arador had given him a strange sort of blessing.
Heart lighter and happier than it had been in years, Arathorn made his way to Gilraen’s house. His normally grim face softened into a more neutral expression, happiness showing in his eyes.
Looking ahead, he spotted a bright patch of flowers in a field not too far away. He slipped off his steed and strode towards them. Picking a good-sized bouquet, he mulled over the words he wanted to say for the umpteenth time. Then he strolled back to his mount and put his left foot in the stirrup, mounting with just one hand so as to keep his gift safe.
A few minutes later, he arrived at Gilraen’s house. He swung off Rûthfuin and looped the reins over her head, knowing she would not wander far. Striding to the door, he raised his right hand and rapped, a series of five sharp booms against the painted blue door.
Dírhael slipped Ivorwen a puzzled look before answering. “Lord Arathorn,” he greeted. “Did that horseshoe not work?”
“It’s been perfect, thank you. I come here for another reason. May I speak with you?” He glanced at curious Ivorwen, who stepped up behind her husband and placed a hand on his shoulder, so the Ranger added, “Alone?”
The couple exchanged a look before Ivorwen stepped away and Dírhael motioned for Arathorn to join him on the porch where two pale wooden caned chairs sat.
Each man took a seat and Arathorn began. “Dírhael, sir, I would like your permission to court your daughter Gilraen.”
The older man’s face hardened a bit, his deep blue eyes concerned. “No.”
A gasp sounded inside as Ivorwen couldn’t help but listen next to the window, reliving her own courtship saga. Thankfully for her, her father had come around once he’d seen how much she loved Dírhael, and how much he loved her and was willing to sacrifice for her.
The men ignored the small interruption and stared at each other. Blue eyes wide, Arathorn scooted his chair a bit further back, clenching the flowers tightly in his left hand. “I…I don’t understand.”
“I said no. I have no idea how much clearer I can be.”
“Alright. I respect your decision. Thank you for your time.”
Ivorwen bustled out of the door, a determined look on her face. “Lord Arathorn, I would like you to come back for lunch tomorrow. Please.” She gave Dírhael her look that told him she knew what she was doing and don’t try to stop her.
Sighing, the older man nodded. “Yes, that will be fine.”
Arathorn gave a small smile. “Thank you. Farewell.” He strode away without looking back and mounted Rûthfuin. However, instead of riding straight for the village to stay in the inn, he made his way to a secret location of which Gilraen fondly spoke. There he left the bouquet of flowers, crushed stems and all, on a small stump. He drew the Dúnedain star in the dirt next to it before he left, hoping she would visit her spot and find his small gift.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
elfmaiden77
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on: May 28, 2015 04:37
My gosh! Can I read the whole story??? Please!!!! This is super! I hardly ever come out here anymore, so can you pm me and tell me if I can? I loved it. It sparked my imagination
findemaxam48
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on: May 28, 2015 06:27
Very good, Blue! I have never read a fan fiction on Arathorn before.

Here is my response to the prompt...forgive me for the typos, this is the first post I am making from my phone.

I walk in circles around the tree, counting how many steps it takes for me to circumfrance it. I wait for ten minutes before I start to worry. Where is he?

I set my sword down against the trunk, taking care to be sure it doesn't loosen. I grip my hair in my hands and do my best to keep a grip on my reality. Wounds- both physical and mental-have taken a toll on my reaction times and responses. The breeze ruffles my clothes and drops them back down like water over a rock.

Then I see him. Sauntering casually up over the hill. For some reason, my eyes fixate on his shirt, dark blue. It looks warm on this fall day.

Seeing Jed makes me smile. No matter what happens, he is going to be there for me. My co-conspirator. My best friend.

But now, he needs to see mad. "Why are you late?" I demand, putting a hand on my hip.

"Sorry," Jed tells me. He extends his arm and hands me a bouquet of flowers. Yellow and purple.

I take the flowers in my hand. "You were late for a stradegy meeting with me because you were picking flowers? Are you sure you are a seventeen year old boy?"

"They reminded ne if you," Jed tells me honestly. "You deserve some nice things. Besides. They were the only ones still alive in this cold."

"So you kill them?" I say, staring down at the petals in my hands. "You should have let them grow."

"Well, you plant them then, " he tells me, picking up my sword. I lunge for it and he moves back. "There was a time," He tells me softly, "that I never thought I would see you live to carry this."

Before I can react, he touches my left temple. "Do you have any idea how close you were to being gone?"

Nope. No idea. It happens when a sword wipes out most of your memory. But I can't bring myself to say this to Jed. So I say, looking right at him, "Yes. But I wasn't worried. I knew you were there to save me."

And then, it happens. His lips are on mine. I stay still, but somehow, my arms drop down to wrap him in a hug.

I never expected Jed and I to be...together. I don't think anyone did. But I do know one thing. Now that I've got him, I am not letting him go.

We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
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