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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: February 26, 2017 10:42
<snickers>

Dear Diary,

My fool brothr came and to sea me cant remeber when exactlt. Sometume. Starvimg must hav some thing to eat.

Melkr
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Lord_Sauron
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on: February 26, 2017 07:46
Dear Diary,

My brother keeps on calling me a fool. Well atleast I know to spell unlike my very dim witted brother. I just rembered that once heard Daeron singing a song something on the lines of
"You know I wish that I had Beren's girl. I wish that I had Beren's girl.

Manwe the educated
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: February 27, 2017 01:24
Dear Diary,

My poor husband is so stressed these days. I blame it all on Fëanor. After he refused to take back his Oath, things just spiraled out of control, and he has never quite recovered from it. Now his brother (I use the term loosely) is giving him grief. Apparently, he's unhappy with his accommodations.

Perhaps I should sent Tulkas to speak with him, and sort him things out. I'll put it on my to-do list for tomorrow.

Varda
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Lord_Sauron
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on: March 19, 2017 09:41
Dear Diary,

Don't blame me if the Valar mainly Manwe are a bunch of whimps and to afraid of Morgoth. Perhaps they should of guarded their trees a little better. Why couldn't Aule create a fence around the trees using the same material he used to chain Morgoth.

Feanor

[Edited on 03/20/2017 by Lord_Sauron]
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: March 20, 2017 01:32
Dear Diary,

Can I count the days ... I've been stuck here so long I've taken root. I remember the days when I used to wander the hills and visit with old friends. Now I'm stuck watching a stupid fountain in the shape of some weird bird with water spouting out of its mouth.

White Tree of Gondor aka Fimbrethil
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Lord_Sauron
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on: April 12, 2017 08:35
Dear Diary,

How dare Gandalf try and throw me out of Orthanc and more importantly what gives him the authority to cast me out of the Order of which I am in charge of. The Valar chose me to lead. I had the feeling that Gandalf was conspiring against me as soon as we landed in Middle Earth.

Saruman
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: April 14, 2017 11:58
Dear Diary,

Now that my replacement is nothing but a shadow of his former self, I wonder if I could get my old job back. I could use something to keep me amused over the next couple of eons or so.

Tevildo
Prince of Cats

"Help wanted: very experienced tracker to search for, find and retrieve a bewildered Dwarf wandering my sinuses long after their clearance, with all his tools."
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Lord_Sauron
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on: April 22, 2017 09:36
Dear Diary,

So the cat wants his old job back because Sauron is just a shadow of his former self. The cat fails to realise once I break out of the Void I will restore Sauron to his former self and he will again be my second in command.
Though I do have a job for the cat which he may like.

Morgoth
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: April 24, 2017 01:42
Dear Diary,

I've never been so insulted in my life!

It's bad enough that the black-hearted son of Eu won't restore me to my former position, he's had the gall to offer me the position of his Head Vermin Hunter. Like I'm willing to go up against him by killing off all of his creations.

Well, unless the first piece of vermin I eliminate is his fair-haired boy, Sauron. Oh wait *snickers* Sauron's been defeated so many times by his enemies he can't assume a proper shape any longer.

Tevildo
Laughing Prince of Cats

"I've been hearing strange noises in one ear, where a Dwarf has likely arrived via my sinuses."
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Gandolorin
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on: April 29, 2017 03:16

Dear Diary,

what are those void-addled baddies babbling about? The mangy feline cracks me up the most. I mean, those voidies are obviously behind the Arda information curve. Otherwise they should at least guess why Námo has provided me with this really neat kennel and plenty of opportunities for exercise. Of course, this is all in a very remote and obscure part of his halls. But should against all odds those pathetic entities Tevildo and Thû ever escape the void, I am very ready to remind them of who body-slammed them with ease the odd eon ago.

Smirking Huan.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: April 29, 2017 06:49
Dear Diary,

Oh dear. The cat and the hound (excellent name for a pub) are going at each other now.

I would love to move Tevildo to some obscure point, but the wife is partial to cats and won't be happy if I do. She's already been hinting that he should be moved into the Halls to deal with her "perceived" mouse problem. She's convinced they're chewing on her tapestries.

I suspect I'm going to have to move him into the Halls to keep her happy, although it's going to be tricky.

Námo (the nagged)

"I've been hearing strange noises in one ear, where a Dwarf has likely arrived via my sinuses."
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Gandolorin
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on: April 29, 2017 07:35
Dear Diary,

so Tevildo felt insulted because his boss wanted to give him a job as "Head Vermin Hunter", as T grandiosely termed it. Now Námo is going to put T to work chasing mice in The Halls at the instigation of Vairë. What a rare agreement between The Void and The Halls regarding what that silly feline is only good for.

ROTFL Huan.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: May 01, 2017 05:50
Dear Diary,

The hound thought it was hilarious when he heard that I was going to be hunting mice in the Halls.

I was sent there to perform such a demeaning task, but was quickly relieved of my duties when Vairë caught me sharpening my claws on her precious tapestries.

As I was vacating the premises, I overheard Námo thanking Oromē for agreeing to loan him Huan to chase the rabbits off the lawns around the Halls.

Can you say: Woof, woof.

(ROTFLMAO)Tevildo

"Beware of old codgers who suddenly have too much time on their hands!"
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Gandolorin
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on: May 02, 2017 12:41
Dear Diary,

Well, that’s how quickly things can change. Seems Aiwendil, who’s supposed to go to Middle-earth with four other Maiar, rounded up all the rabbits to take them with him to some place called Rhosgobel – wherever that’s supposed to be.

An I overheard Vairë arguing with Námo what the problem is supposed to be, “that cat doesn’t need claws to catch mice, so just have him de-clawed, for Eru’s sake!”

Meow, screech, kitty kitty.
Hysterical Huan.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: May 03, 2017 11:33
Dear Diary,

I've managed to sneak on board the ship that's taking the Maiar to Middle-earth, although I've had to hide in the bilge and the smell is most unpleasant. The one good thing about the trip is the food ..... fresh rabbit meat daily. Although I may have to curtail my hunting, as the strange looking Maia is beginning to count the silly rodents.

Tevildo


"Beware of old codgers who suddenly have too much time on their hands!"
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Gandolorin
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on: May 04, 2017 01:42
Dear Diary,

Well, we found that dratted cat Tevildo as a stowaway on our ship. No wonder rabbits have been disappearing. We’ve been discussing what to do with the annoying kitty, and would you believe it, Curumo claims to have a cat allergy?!? Now is he simply incompetent in his incarnation, or is he being devious? I had been a bit dubious about taking a Maia of Aulë’s along, I mean look at how Sauron turned out. We’ve come to the conclusion that probably it’s best for Alatar and Pallando, being Maiar of Oromë’s, to take this wannabe hunter with them into the east.

Somewhat annoyed Aiwendil.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: May 05, 2017 07:29
Dear Diary,

The Maia on the ship discovered me. For some odd reason they have decided that I am to accompany Oromë’s Maiar on their particular quest. They seem to have forgotten that it was my interaction with Oromë’s Huan that caused my Lord Melkor to replace me with that fool Mairon. I have no love for any associates of that particular Vala.

Mind you, they don't appear particularly motivated, or bright, so I should be able to give them the slip once we set out. In the meantime they're feeding me well, and I have my own bunk.

Tevildo

"Beware of old codgers who suddenly have too much time on their hands!"
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Gandolorin
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on: May 07, 2017 04:07
Dear Diary,

now what’s this nonsense that Pallando and I am supposed to take this cretinous cat with us on our mission? Unfortunately, the other three have voted that we should do so (though we both have doubts about Curumo’s reasons for doing so. To put it more plainly, we generally have doubt about Curumo). But the foolish feline seems to become distracted easily, so Pallando and I should have little trouble in “loosing” this third-rate mousetrap fairly quickly.

Annoyed Alatar.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: May 07, 2017 11:03
*purring softly while writing*

Dear Diary,

Apparently, the Blue Boys are angry that they have been "saddled" with me. Well, they needn't worry over much for I shall depart their company as soon as possible.

Tevildo
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Gandolorin
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on: May 14, 2017 08:24
Dear Diary,

Checking our route into the east of Middle-earth, we found this place in the south of a mountain range called the Misty Mountains. Big, deeply delved habitation of Dwarves called Moria or something. Pallando and I are guessing that such a place would probably be quite popular with certain types of vermin, so perhaps the Dwarves living there might have some use for this, if third-rate, mouse-trap there. Since the mangy-furred flea-bag so far has not noticed that the “necklace” we gave him is actually a junior version of Morgoth’s chain Angainor, handing him over to the Dwarves should be a piece of cake.

Alatar.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: May 15, 2017 02:09
Dear Diary,

Those numbskulls thought the wee (and I do mean wee) chain they put around my neck would make me malleable, little knowing I'm something of an expert on collars and such. Getting rid of it was as easy as fishing for carp in Melkor's private pond.

On my way to ..... *hisses*

Tevildo
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Lord_Sauron
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on: May 29, 2017 06:21
Dear Diary,

Our "fearless" leader Saruman has decided to leave us and head back to Gandalf in Rivendell. Alatar believes that something spooked Saruman into runing away. I have no idea of what could have spooked Saruman, Alatar thinks he should of been put incharge of the Istari.

Pallendo
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: May 30, 2017 11:17
Dear Diary,

They had a cat with them! I'm allergic to cats! Thank goodness I discovered it before I came into close contact with it.

Saruman

“Beware of Dragons collecting sayings!”
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Lord_Sauron
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on: June 03, 2017 08:56
Dear Diary,

Saruman has requested that I send Gandalf to meet him in Orthanc. I have also asked the Eagles to just do a fly bye in case something is up.

Radagast
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: June 06, 2017 08:04
Dear Diary,

The meeting was short and violent after which I was confined to the top of the tower. Fortunately, I was able to escape thanks to Gwaihir, who had been asked to check on me should Saruman try anything shifty.

Not sure how to proceed at the moment.

Gandalf
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Lord_Sauron
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on: June 06, 2017 10:45
Dear Diary,

I offered Gandalf a position of power all he had to do was aid me. We could of worked together and use the Ring of power against Sauron. We could have had control of Middle Earth. I was thinking about my plan when I accidentally touched the Palantir, I am not sure if Sauron knows about my plan to supplant him. I might have to act quickly I am no match against Sauron without the Ring

Saruman
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: June 07, 2017 09:35
Dear Diary,

That fool Saruman thinks he can find my Ring and usurp my power. Little does he know I have managed to maintain open contact with him via the Palantíri. I know exactly what he's planning.

If the Nazgûl can get their act together, I should have no problem getting rid of him before his plans come to fruition. I must speak to the Witch-king tomorrow morning.

Sauron
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Lord_Sauron
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on: June 07, 2017 10:50
Dear Diary,

I have been summoned to Barad dur, rumour is that my Msster's Ring has been found. I have told the other eight to make preparations for our journey. I cannot see why the Dark Lord can't come with us he does have a body after all and from what I remember he is an excellent rider. Let's see what he wants.

Witch King of Angmar
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: June 09, 2017 05:38
Dear Diary,

Rumour is running rampant through the Halls that evil has been defeated in Arda with the fall of Morgoth's apprentice Mairon. Apparently, it had to do with some ring or other that he had created. He's been tossed into the Void to join his former mentor: moaning and groaning like he's lost something of actual value.

He should try being cursed by Mandos, and loosing three valuable jewels to his nibs. I still haven't got them back, despite my sons holding true to their Oath. Mind you, Maedhros and Maglor finally found two of them, only to toss them away. Talk about a tragedy! They still haven't given me a satisfactory explanation why they would do such a stupid thing.

Fëanor
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Lord_Sauron
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on: June 12, 2017 12:40
Dear Diary,

I have heard that the Dwarves of the Lonely Mountain have discovered a great jewel burried deep within the mountain. They call it the Arkenstone and have given it to their King Thror. Could this be the Silmaril that I took into to that fiery chasm?
The World did reshape after the Fall of Numenor and the Silmaril could have drifted.
I won't say anything to my Father at this point not until I am certain. Father would get extremely angry if it was a Silmaril.

Maedhros
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: June 16, 2017 09:14
Dear Diary,

We've been married for thousands of years and he still doesn't fold the towels after he bathes. He just drops them on the floor, expecting the servants to clean up after him. I don't know why he can't take a few minutes so that the bathing chamber is in good order when I come in to take my bath. *sighs* I suppose it really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, but it really irks me.

Galadriel
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Lord_Sauron
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on: June 16, 2017 02:25
Dear Diary,

I know it not my place to say anything bad against my Lord Celeborn, but I can't take it anymore. I know that I am a mere servant but can he not help a bit? For example folding his towel nicely on the rack. Lady Galadriel seems to be able to hang up her towel. Also when I served King Thingol and Queen Melain they actually helped around the Palace.

Royal Elf Servant
Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: June 17, 2017 04:40
Dear Diary,

Altáriel is on one of her 'Celeborn make-over' jags. I don't know why she bothers. He never pays any attention to her when she nags him. He just gets annoyed and goes hunting for a few days, or decides to check on what we Wardens are up to, which is a bloody nuisance.

Haldir

“I would cut off your head, beard and all, Master Dwarf, if it stood but a little higher from the ground.”
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Lord_Sauron
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on: June 19, 2017 11:44
Dear Diary,

What ever happened to finders keepers?. It's a rule that we Hobbits stick to back in the Shire, I assumed that this rule of finders keepers is also known in the rest of Middle Earth. Well the thing is I found a round black stone in the water and seeing that I found it I should be the one to keep it right?, Wrong old Gandalf took it straight off me.
As soon as he is a sleep I am going to take it back and have a good look at it, perhaps I could sell it.

Pippin
Gandolorin
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on: June 20, 2017 02:02
Dear Diary.

well, well, so Curuno has a Hobbit as his “guest”. But … why would Curuno allow him to look into the Orthanc Palantir? Has he, or have his pathetic minions, been negligent in guarding this Gollum-relative? I have the feeling that my former Aulë-colleague has become a bit unbalanced. Must send one of the Nazgûl to Orthanc to get a clearer picture.

Puzzled Sauron.
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