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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: September 14, 2014 11:03
Dear Diary,

My new BF, Smaug, thinks he's figured a way out of this bowl thingy we're trapped in. I'm a bit skeptical but, what the heck, what have we got to lose? Being in this thing is about as boring as it gets.

*after concentrating their fire power on a fault in the blown glass bowl they are able to escape*

Glad I brought my journal. The red guy's plan actually worked and we're free to roam the Halls. It sure feels good to stretch my wings! I wonder where I can find that twerp Huan? He should be around here somewhere.

Ancalagon,
The Free (at last)

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Gandolorin
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on: September 14, 2014 03:08
Dear Diary,

now those dinky little lizards are loose. Seems the were bored. Guess I'll just send for Aulë to round them up, maybe they can make themselves useful in his forges - maybe. They seem to overestimate their fires immensely, barely useful as matchsticks to get my Valinorean pipeweed lit.

Mandos.
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tarcolan
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on: September 20, 2014 01:49
Dear Diary

One, two, three, four... Stay still!! One, two, three, four, five... Treacle, come back here! And you Pinkynose... One, two, three, four... no, no stop running off. Stay! Come here! Oh this is hopeless!

Queen Beruthiel
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Gandolorin
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on: September 20, 2014 03:58
Dear Diary,

that that strange woman that took us in definitely needs to seek some help with a pet counselor! "Stay still! Come here!" What does she think we are, dogs????? *gag, cough* Well, the thought helped me get rid of my fur ball, at least.

Cat No. 6.

[Edited on 09/20/2014 by Gandolorin]
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tarcolan
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on: September 30, 2014 12:55
Dear Diary

Met Radagast on the road. He said the Nine were abroad. Huh! All right for some. I could do with a holiday myself. At least I don't have to worry about them for a while, sunning themselves on some foreign beach.

Gandalf
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Gandolorin
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on: September 30, 2014 02:16
Dear Diary,

caught those dinky little lizards like Mandos requested.
But useful in my forges?
I almost got a hernia from laughing!

Guess I'll just slap together a terrarium that they definitely can't get out of.

Aulë
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: October 02, 2014 08:54
Dear Diary,

Well it was fun while it lasted. Silly Valie pitched a fit when she found us lurking amongst her tapestries and complained to Blondie Manwë who tried to pass us off onto Aulë. That went well .... NOT!

We loved playing in the forge but we kept upsetting the molten metal all over his nice clean floors. He pitched a fit and built us a terrarium. Now we're stuck inside it. The fake plastic flora are just a tad tacky, and I won't even comment on the "dirt". Frankly, I think he should spend more time playing with his Dwarves and leave us alone.

One positive development: We have relieved a bit of the boredom. A betting pool has been started by Maglor. The winner will get a new body if he, or she, guesses the correct date when we bust out.

Smaug
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Gandolorin
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on: October 04, 2014 03:17
Dear Diary,

now what's this I hear from the hidden things I put in the terrarium for the dinky little lizards to eavesdrop on them: there are betting games going on in Mandos's halls! The Fea there are supposed to being doing penance, meditating on their wrongs to better themselves ... and now it's turning into a gambling hole! Or maybe he's just having fun at their expense, since he would know if the bets are wrong or right. But should he be doing this? Maybe I gotta talk to Manwë.

Aulë
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: October 04, 2014 05:12
Dear Diary,

I do wish Aulë would learn to take his problems to the right person. He keeps coming to me for some reason.

Now he's complaining about betting games going on in the Halls. I am NOT in charge of the Halls. I have enough to do figuring out what to get my picky wife for her anniversary present; and seeing to the health and welfare of my benighted brother. I told him to take it up with Námo and sent him away with a flea in his ear.

(I wonder what the odds are and if it's too late to get in on the action.)

Manwë
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Gandolorin
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on: October 04, 2014 06:31
Dear Diary,

oh, yeah, right, "I have enough to do figuring out what to get my picky wife for her anniversary present."

Hellooooo? He has to figure this out? He's been here every single *bleep* anniversary to get me and my Elven master smiths to make something for her. Maybe Mandos should give him the REAL low-down on why Fëanor hotfooted in outta here???

I hope Eru sees all of this degeneration of Valinor. Getting to Manwë's proprietary connection thingy with the Really Big Boss (as he claims that it is) could be a challenge.

Aulë
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: October 05, 2014 07:55
Dear Diary,

I wonder what's up. Rumour has it that Aulë has been mentioning me in his diary. Whatever he's been saying isn't true. I don't know anything about it. I don't know why everybody wants to pick on me. The boys think I'm becoming paranoid and have suggested I see a shrink. Not sure what that is .... something to do with the head. I don't want anybody shrinking my head.

I think they may be in league with their Uncles. They want to have me declared insane so ownership of the Silmarils can be awarded to them. They can't have them! I made them and they're mine! Besides, Maedhros and Maglor had them in their hands and threw them away! Like I'm going to trust them with them .... well, maybe Curufin .... no, he's too sly for his own good. I'm never sure what he's actually thinking.

Must remember to hide this diary where they can't find it.

Fëanor
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Gandolorin
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on: October 16, 2014 05:49
Dear Diary,

with all this ruckus going on, I need a good pipeful of smoke. Since Aulë hasn't fixed the volcano I usually use to light my pipe, I guess the (barely) next best would be the dinky little lizards. Better get both of them, and I'll probably have to squeeze their little bellies a bit to get enough fire to get my pipe lit.

Mandos.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: October 17, 2014 01:15
Dear Diary,

Now Manwë and Aulë are meeting each other: I'm sure it's to talk about me. I hear whispers everywhere.

I hid behind one of the tapestries the other day (?), and I heard Vairë and Varda discussing "things" hiding in the tapestries". I don't know how they knew I was there. Somebody must have ratted me out: probably that conniving son of mine.

Gotta go! Somebody's coming.

Fëanor
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Gandolorin
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on: October 17, 2014 02:48
Dear Diary,

it's just a sad sight to see how Fëanor's paranoia is just not improving even after thousands of years. Trying to hide somewhere in the Halls, c'mon, I ALWAYS know where EVERYONE is in these Halls. *sigh* Well, now that I've got my pipe going and put the the dinky little lizards back in their terrarium, maybe he'd like to play with them? Sometimes animals can soothe being's nerves.

Mandos
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: October 19, 2014 09:36
Dear Diary,

*!&*#! - How did we end up back here again? *raps tail against glass*

It's that stupid black lizard's fault; he's always giving our hiding places away by setting fire to the blasted tapestries. Apparently, learning to control his flame wasn't high on his priorities when he was a 'tadpole' *snickers* Mind you, the excitement was almost worth getting caught. Vairë actually smacked Mandos for not keeping an eye on us. Apparently, setting fire to the tapestry depicting the Fall on Númenor was a serious no,no.

Smaug
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Gandolorin
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on: October 20, 2014 01:59
Dear Diary,

now what was Mandos thinking when he plopped me into this terrarium with those pipe-lighters??? Totally useless for making new Silmarils, the pathetic creatures! I hope they manage to find a way to do whatsoever is necessary to get out of here and *BLEEEEEP* leave me alone!

Fëanor
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: October 21, 2014 07:43
Dear Diary,

What's that paranoid freak "Fëanor" doing in our terrarium? He's seriously certifiable (according to Smaug) and should be kept in a private sanitarium wing. We're in enough trouble already and I don't want to be blamed for any escape plots he may hatch (ha, ha).

Oh, the "father of dragons" has finally awoken from his nap. Smaug is having a right old chat with him. I wonder what they're concocting?

much later ......

Well, the old geezer finally came up with something useful. He says we should organize and ask for proper protocols regarding our confinement .... like have a Geneva Convention of our own, whatever that is.


Ancalagon
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Gandolorin
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on: October 23, 2014 01:38
Dear Diary,

oh great, what I thought was a lumpy log turns out to be a third of those pipe-lighters! Seems to older than the other two, has no wings, and babbles more nonsense than the other two together. "Protocols regarding confinement", sure! That balderdash will only lead to one of the very rare occasions when Mandos has a hysterical laughing fit. Come to think of it, if he babbles on in that way, it might get amusing in here ...

Fëanor
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: November 05, 2014 04:46
Dear Diary,

Well, we managed to break out last evening and the Elf insisted on coming with us. All he does is complain about everything. And, if that's not enough, the old geezer can't fly and is insisting we all walk because: "He's the Father of Dragons." ... yeah, as if.

Smaug says we can't use the tapestries because I keep setting them on fire, completely ignoring the fact that it was his sneeze that started the last conflagration. I'm for still hiding but everybody, including the Elf, thinks we have to get out of the Halls altogether. Yeah, like Mandos is going to allow that to happen.

Oh, here he comes, gotta run ....

Ancalagon the Black

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Gandolorin
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on: November 06, 2014 11:23
Dear Diary,

OK, I definitely have to think over whom I let share accomodations with whom. The two pipe-lighters with wings and the one without, plus Fëanor - another fiery one - are NOT a good idea to put together. But then, I must have some serious words with Aulë about the quality of his terrariums! Second time dinky little lizards (AKA pipe lighters) have manged to get out! Even with Fëanor's help, that should NOT BE POSSIBLE!

Mandos.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: November 11, 2014 02:18
Dear Diary,

It would seem that freedom is a fleeting thing in this place. We're back in confinement again. It looks bad, I must say: Aulë has redesigned the terrarium and made it out of some odd black metal. (I suspect he's been talking to that grump, Eöl, or his son Maeglin.) Our next outing's gonna take some time.

Hey! Where are the Elf and the old geezer?

Ancalagon

[Edited on 11/13/2014 by Evil~Shieldmaiden]
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Gandolorin
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on: November 13, 2014 12:13
Dear Diary,

all right, the pipe-lighters with wings ain't here. Though that lumpy (and as I am now able to hear) snoring log is here. It's minimal, but it IS an improvement in accommodations.

Fëanor
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: November 13, 2014 12:24
Dear Diary,

I'm getting fed up with Manwë asking me to build new terrariums all the time because he can't keep the dragons confined. Not only that, he blames me for the incarceration of the dragons, and placing Fëanor in with them; but I had nothing to do with any of it.

Oromë was the one that brought them to the Halls. Something to do with his love of all manner of creatures .... part of his "Save the Animals of Arda" campaign. How Fëanor got in there is anybody's guess.

Aulë
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Gandolorin
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on: November 18, 2014 01:42
Dear Diary,

this place is getting weirder all the time. Oromë has some strange "Save the Animals of Arda" campaign, by rumor. And this has to do with me - what?

Confused Fëanor.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: November 18, 2014 11:12
Dear Diary,

What an appalling day I've had.

Firstly, I was called away from a hunt in Arda just as I was about to capture a rare deer for my new deer park, and ordered by Manwë to attend an emergency conference with His Nibs, Mandos and Aulë at the Halls.

Secondly, I was accused ... me accused .... of bringing "all manner of creatures into the Halls"; when I haven't brought any animals into the halls. I don't who's been floating that rumour, but I have my suspicions.

Thirdly, I did not ... I repeat: I did not ... being any dragons, down-sized or otherwise, into the Halls to be confined in a variety of terrariums created by Aulë; from which they apparently seem to be constantly escaping.

Finally, I had nothing to do with Fëanor being in the terrarium. How he got in there is as much a mystery to me as it is to them.

Mind you, they have no compunction about dragging me into searching for him, and waste the rest of what was a perfect hunting trip.

I hope tomorrow will be better.

Oromë

PS - I guess I can forget about tomorrow: I just found out that Glaurung is still on the loose, as well.
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Gandolorin
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on: November 19, 2014 12:55
Dear Diary,

now the biggie Valar are going at each other with the blame game - reminds me of something? You know, I'm starting to think that getting out of these halls and into The Void might be desirable! What I've been told, the Vala skunk is out there, but hey! we at least have those Silmarils to drool about in common. Agreement with Morgoth on anything - what has this place come to!

Utterly annoyed Fëanor.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: November 20, 2014 11:02
Dear Diary,

I was sitting at my grooming table last night, brushing my hair its usual 100 strokes when I noticed how sallow I looked in the candlelight. The silver hair and grey eyes really don't make one look particularly healthy; it occurs to me that I might look better if I had dark hair, like a Noldo. I will speak with my hairdresser next week.

Eärwen
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Gandolorin
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on: November 21, 2014 11:33
Dear Diary,

when will these Valarian Elves ever get it? Teleri wanting Noldo color, Noldo wanting Vanyar color - HELLO???
Your hair color is part of your innermost being, folks!
I cut; I curl (no Elf has curly hair); and THAT IS IT.

Take your complaints to Eru!!!

Valinor Elven hairdresser thinking of heading east over the Great Sea.
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: November 29, 2014 01:17
Dear Diary,

My BHF (Best Hound Friend) Huan and I are getting pretty sick of outdoor living. Winter is coming. (Where have I heard that phrase before .... ??) We would like to find a comfy, warm place to curl up for the next few months but can't decide where to go. I have suggested the Shire as Hobbits are know lovers of comfort and food, but Huan thinks we would be better off with Elves. All I know is we had better decide soon. I woke up this morning with a touch of snow on my fur.

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Gandolorin
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on: December 08, 2014 02:58
Dear Diary,

would you believe that Tevildo has started following me around? Seems that my beating up on Carcharoth really made his day (some vague favorite-pet issue from Angband, as far as I understand it).

T is quite right about Hobbits being known lovers of comfort and food, but we as the hugest canine respectively feline in history are not really suited for living with the Halflings. Also, they are very good archers, almost as good as the Elves (though much more short-ranged), and I don't want to test what it feels like to be a dart-board!

Anyway, the Elves are hunters more than farmers, so vittles useful to us carnivores are more likely to be found there.

But I definitely have to take the lead in introducing us, there are folks here who may remember T from the First Age. Now, how did Olórin handle the situation with this were-bear again ... ?

Huan
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: December 19, 2014 05:13
Dear Diary,

Well, it was quite the surprise to see the dragons on the loose. Rumour had it they were locked up in some kind of glass bowl. Anyway, they've decided to join my BHF, Huan, and crash the seasonal feasts that the Elves are about to give. Should be exciting. Thank the Valar: Mandos shrank them when he put them in the "terrarium?" (not that I know what that is) or they wouldn't fit through the doors (or windows).

Tevildo
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Gandolorin
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on: December 22, 2014 12:40
Dear Diary,

now what is all this about? T has brought three little dinky lizards along with him. Shouldn't they be in their glass thingy? Two of them have wings, but how is the fat one without wings going to be able to keep up with us? Anyway, from rumors I've heard, none of the three are going to be welcomed by any Elves.
I must have a serious discussion with T about this!

Huan
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: December 23, 2014 01:01
Dear Diary,

Free at last; and at a most propitious time of year too. Thank goodness we've been shrunk down as it will enable us to infiltrate the holiday dinner parties more easily. Mind you, Smaug keeps saying the food won't be to his liking as he prefers living flesh. I had to tell him to be quiet and just enjoy things. He's such a whiner.

The hound and cat seem okay. Apparently they have successfully crashed any number of parties before so I guess we'll just follow their lead.

Glaurung
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Gandolorin
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on: December 23, 2014 04:22
Dear Diary,

"Thank goodness we've been shrunk down as it will enable us to infiltrate the holiday dinner parties more easily". Does Glaurung need a reality check??? I've flown around here briefly, and what I've seen has NOT steadied my nerves! Ancalagon has even refused to do a reconnaissance flight - seems some bird named Thorondor has seriously rattled HIS nerves.

Whatever.

We have seriously crossed the hunter / prey line in the wrong direction! T and H (he seems to be a bit puzzled to annoyed by our presence) are giants of their kind; normal-sized relatives of theirs are now a serious threat to us - come to think of it, the larger versions of T's PREY could be trouble.

But I guess I have no choice but to nervously tag along - but going to Erebor is definitely NOT going to include me!

Smaug
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Evil~Shieldmaiden
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on: December 24, 2014 12:40
Dear Diary,

All I can say is .... woohoo! We've made it out of the gloomy Halls and into the bright sunshine of Valinor. I can scarcely believe it! The old geezer is being a great sport about things, although the red dude is complaining as usual. He's become quite paranoid since being shrunk. I mean we may be tiny but we're still dragons, for Valar's sake.

The hound and the cat are fabuloso and have a couple of gigs lined up in the food department so life is totally rad. I can't wait to hit the food tables when we .....

Apparently, I'm not allowed to reveal our plans even in my secret diary. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to dish on the party after it happens.

Ancalagon
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