Corrupt questions for the innocent
An interview with the uncorrupted weaver morcollo by the corrupted weavers of Vaire
What prompted you to remain uncorrupted, in the midst of so much corruption?
The angel on my shoulder decided to do its job for the first time in 15 years, and I didn’t fancy having to look after a fellbeast.
Don’t you find being on the good side boring?
Not at all. We throw good parties!
How do you feel about the changes you and the uncorrupted have made to Mordor?
Very pleased, although I feel guilty about suggesting that the orcs should wear tutus…
What would you do with the One Ring had you found it first? (Tell us the truth, now!)
Honestly? I’d probably put it down somewhere and forget where I left it.
What was it about the uncorrupted weavers that inspired you to join them?
I enjoy the company of the uncorrupted weavers, but I prefer to be on the winning side. And we get to hang out with elves!
Out of interest just how much good work have you done, since you started your resistance against corruption?
Umm, ski slope, rollercoaster, inviting Glorfindel to keep us company… we’re doing OK, I think!
Who is the most annoying villain on the ‘bad’ side and why?
I got threatened with a balrog attack when we started redecorating Mordor, so I’m not very fond of them. EM dressed as Glorfindel and scared them off, though. They’re not that bright.
What is it about Sauron & Co. that frightens you most?
They make the place look untidy!
When were you first introduced to Tolkien’s work, and which is your favourite?
I read LOTR when I was ridiculously young, and it’s still my favourite.
You are an accomplished poet – how did your interest in writing develop? And who are your favourite writers?
My favourite writer is Oscar Wilde, because he broke every rule, both in writing and in life – the main point is not that he was eventually imprisoned, but that he got away with so much before that. I started writing because… probably because it was the one way to star in the Nativity concert after years of being Inn-Keeper’s Wife #3. I’d rather be a songwriter than a poet (except I can’t sing or play an instrument) so my favourite ‘poems’ are Pink Floyd’s Shine On You Crazy Diamond, Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody, and Jumpin’ Jack Flash by The Rolling Stones. Great to see an appreciation of classical poetry, isn’t it!
If you had a chance to take a holiday on Middle Earth, where would you choose to go?
Definitely Rivendell. In fact, I’d move there for good if I wouldn’t miss my computer (and family, of course, but they’re less useful)
Do feel that it’s possible for an Orc’s soul to be saved?
I’ve been a Weaver long enough to know that there’s always a balance, and if an elf can be corrupted, an orc can be redeemed (unless it’s hurt Elrond, in which case no force on Earth could save it from me!)
How do you spend your time, apart from redecorating Mordor?
Put it this way – if I spent as much time doing work as I do avoiding it, I’d probably be Prime Minister by now! Outside of school, I spend my time reading, writing, and sleeping (actually, I do all that in school, too!) and I like shopping. A busy life, isn’t it!
