Varda’s Name Factory by ~Mirilien~Undómiel~
Ever seen those crazy names most Vardians have got in their signature? Ever wondered where they come from and what they mean? The answer is very simple; they’re being produced in the Name Factory. The what?! Don’t worry, many react that way. Therefore, let me tell you the story of this miraculous part of the Realm of Varda.
A long, long time ago, there was a wizard. For many years, she – no that’s not a mistake, she isn’t a witch but a she-wizard – had been living in the dark. This had turned the wizard into a crazy old lady, for as long as she hadn’t found the light, the wizard was unable to think. Then suddenly, after all hope had gone, the stupid wizard met a troll. A troll! An ugly, filthy young troll. The wizard was stunned, for when she looked into the troll’s eyes, she was able to reach out to the sun again. The sun! Finally, after all those long years of darkness, she saw light! The wizard was so happy, that she took the troll by her hands and danced with her around the fire. Now, the old lady was able to think again. To think! After all these long years of nothingness! So grateful was she, that she bewitched the troll, and turned her into a cat. A cat! A little black cat, just as crazy as the wizard. And the cat bowed, and jumped on the wizard’s shoulder. She mewed and the old lady laughed, and the two of them went away on many crazy adventures.
Eventually, after long, long years of wandering, the little cat and the stupid wizard had reached the stars. The stars! Little, twinkling lights high up in the sky! And between the stars of Varda, they found many, many Vardians. Vardians! Floating among the stars, playing, talking, laughing. The wizard looked at the cat, and the cat stared back into the old lady’s eyes, and without having to say another word, the two of them decided to hop in and join the party. And with every single one of them, the two crazy little things became friends. Friends! They joined them in their plays, talks, laughter! Now the wizard and the cat lived happily among those stars, and after a while they decided to do something special. The stupid wizard and the black cat had both been given a beautiful name from one of those dancing amidst the crowd of wonderful Vardians, and therefore they wanted to name her as well. Long, long hours of thinking – which was very hard, for the wizard had only just been able to think, and the cat had only got tiny brains – had passed, and then they had come to a conclusion. Not only were they to create a name for her, but also for every other dancer interested! And so the old lady and the cat started working on names. Names! Crazy, personal names! Requests kept coming, and the crazy creatures kept working, and then suddenly, there was a big, blue light. A light! A giant bulb from which Varda’s Name Factory arose. And the cat and the wizard jumped on it and there they are still sitting. Staring at the stars, nudging each other awake, and, of course, always working on new, crazy names.
And so Varda’s Name Factory had been created, and it’s open to every Vardian who wants to have a crazy name! So, if you ever decide to join our Realm, don’t forget to check out our little family business .
* I proudly present the wizard as my dearest uncle silver_Tinuviel