Chapter 2, Flight from the Mire.

Spamdumb: Wait Mr. Author.
Author: What is it, Spam?
Spam: We can’t fly. Why is this chapter called “Flight from the Mire”?
Author: ummÂ…
Spam: Why? Huh? Huh? Why?
Author: Okay! Okay!

Chapter 2, A Long Expected Escape.

Author: HowÂ’s that?
Spam: Better. But we didnÂ’t really expect our escape.
Author: grrr.

Chapter 2, Flight from the Mire.

(Suddenly a lightning bolt strikes Spam!)
Now where were we?

Spam: Ouch.

Quiet Spam.

Rider (draws sword ): WHERE IS THE BROOCH?!
Nodo: WHAT BROOCH?!
Rider: You really donÂ’t know?
Nodo: NO!
Rider (sheaths sword): Oh. Rats. Do you have the keys to StinkyÂ’s Evil-mobile?
Nodo: UmmÂ… no.
Rudolph: Go back to the shadow, flame of Udun! You shall not pass!
Rider: *blink, blink*
Rudolph: Whoopsy! Wrong movie. Be gone foul creature of the Brat! Go back to your master in Moredor.
Rider: *sniff, sniff* IÂ’m sorry! *sniff, sniff*
(He rides off)
Rudolph: Nodo. WhatÂ’s this about a brooch? Does Bimbo have one?
Nodo: Yes. He gave it to me this morning.
Rudolph: Why donÂ’t we go inside. There might be more Dark Gray Riders about.
(They hastily go into the rabbit hole)
Rudolph: Let me see the brooch.
Nodo: Here it is!
(He pulls out a golden brooch. Smooth and unadorned: it is a simple golden oval with a pin on the back, yet it radiates power. With one swift motion Rudolph grabs it from Nodo and throws it into the fireplace. Nodo gives a cry and gropes for something to pull the brooch out with.)
Rudolph: Wait!
Nodo: Yessir. *grumble*
(Rudolph picks up the fire tongs and draws the brooch out of the fire)
Rudolph: Here. Take it! ItÂ’s quite cool. (He drops It into NodoÂ’s outstretched paw)
Rudolph: Is there an inscription of ancient evil?
Nodo: “Bimbo and Tanya forever”
Rudolph: *phew*
Nodo: No wait.
(Rudolph feels his heart grow heavyÂ…)
Nodo: There are letters appearing, fiery lettersÂ… they are in some form of elvish. I canÂ’t read it.
Rudolph: There are few who can.
Nodo: Let me guess you are one of those few?
Rudolph: *nods* It is in the black speech of Moredor, a tongue which I shall not utter here. It runs thus:

Three brooches for Elven kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for mortal men doomed to die.
One for the spoiled brat on his dark throne,
In the land of Moredor where the shadows are.
One Brooch to rule them all,
One Brooch to find them,
One Brooch to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.
In the land of Moredor where the shadows are.

It is said that the fiery letters were put there by StinkyÂ’s father: MilkerÂ… this is the One Brooch. Forged by dark arts in the deep past. Stinky is searching for it and he must not find it. He needs only this brooch to cover all the lands in darkness.
Brooch: NooooodoooooÂ…
Nodo: What was that?
Brooch: NooooodoooooÂ… I am your father.
Nodo: NO!!
Theophilous Limburger Oglethorpe Gorgonzola de Roquefort, I (the director): Cut! ThatÂ’s not in the script!
Brooch: TheoooooooooÂ…
Theophilous Limburger Oglethorpe Gorgonzola de Roquefort, I: What?
Brooch: TheooooooÂ… I am your father.
Theophilous Limburger Oglethorpe Gorgonzola de Roquefort, I (to someone off screen): The brooch is malfunctioning again. Get a replacement in here NOW! (Addressing the viewer) We are experiencing technical difficulties. Please stand by.
(The screen cuts to a test pattern)

To be continuedÂ…