Merry and Pippin are sitting on the ground near a very serious looking Aragorn…

Merry: I’m bored.

Pip: Me too…what should we do? *devilish grins*

Merry: Heehee…*points to Aragorn* I think someone needs a little…’cheering up’, now don’t you think so, my beloved Peregrin? *echoes devilish grin*

Pip: Wahaha…yes he does look a tad serious now, doesn’t he? We can’t have that now can we?

Both: *grin*

Both: Let’s call ourselves the Gruesome Twosome! Fitting, is it not?!

The Two hobbits casually approach Aragorn, both munching on apples.

Merry: Hi Aragorn! What are you up to?

Pippin: Yeah, what ya doin’? *whispers to Merry* Let’s call him Argie, his name is too long for me to say…

Merry: You’re sad, you know that?

Aragorn: Greetings, Meriodoc and Peregrin. *looks too serious* I am contemplating our quest.

Merry:*winks at Pip* Hey man, lighten up! *pulls out fuzzy pink hat* Jump ‘im Pip!

Pip: What if his greasy hair touches me? *shudder*

Merry: Oh shut up.

Pip/Merry: *jump on Argie* *sticks fuzzy hat on* Yaaaaa!

Argie: Wha-? *strugglin violently* *but is overcome by the squealin piles of hair known as hobbits*
*now bound and gagged*

Pip: Okay Merry, now what do we do with him?

Merry: Well, let’s see…We can either let him go, or we could have a little more fun with him.

Pip: I vote for option two.

Merry: Okay, let’s go see if we can find some nice smellin’ perfumes…I’m sure he’d just love that.

Pip: Okay!

Sam: *suddenly pops in*

Pip/Merry: AAH!

Sam: Why does Strider have on a fuzzy pink hat? Oooooo…hee hee FUN!

Pip/Merry: Wahaaha!

*All dig in Sam’s pack of endless doohickees*

Pip: Perfume! *tugs on tied up Argie*

Merry: Heeey…what’s Sam doing with perfume?

Sam: Oh…nothin’…ya know, just uh…well…I like how it smells and all…just like fresh spring flowers-

Merry: Uh, Sam…you can stop now. We really don’t need to hear about your passion for flower scented perfume.

Pip: Here it goes! (Throws the whole bottle in the hat)

Merry: Duh! You have to OPEN the bottle!

Pip: Oops…

Sam: There’s Piip at his best…*is whomped on the head by Pip* Ow hey you nutty…*thud*

Pip: Heh heh.

Merry: Nice goin’ Pip…*snickers*

Both: *smears perfume on Argie’s head*

Argie: *Mmphmph* *squirms*

Merry: Hee hee hee! Great…Now, let’s get see…hmm…hey, Sam, you wouldn’t happen to have any really big, ugly, bright, girly hair bows in your bag, would you? (he looks at
Sam, but then notices Pippin with a rose colored bow stuck on his head)

Pip: What did I do this time?

Merry:get that thing off your head!

Pip: Oh, yeah, right…

Merry: where in Middle-Earth did you get that?

Pip: Stole ’em from Gandalf…you wouldn’t believe the crud that’s stuck inside that beard!

Sam:*grabs bow and sticks on Argie’s head* welp, we’re finished here…who should we do next?

Aragorn is now a pile of pink fuzz, a pink bow, and scented with a lurvly perfume.

Pip: Heh heh…

Merry: Hoo hoo…

Merry and Pippin look at Sam, both plotting dispicable deeds in their minds.

Sam: Umm…actually, I just remembered I left the sprinklers on in the yard. I guess I will see you two later!

He tries to leave but soon he finds himself smushed underneath Merry and Pippin.

Merry: Not so fast Samwise. I think you need a makeover…

Pip: Hee hee…

Sam: (o).O

Two hours later, a very traumatized Sam is seen to emerge. his hair is dyed purple, he has on bright lipstick and smells TOO nice…

Frodo: *comes out of nowhere*

Frodo: (o). O Whathave you done to my Sammy Wammy? *sobs*

Merry/Pip: Uh oh… *look at each other* RUN!

Frodo: *chases the Gruesome Twosome*

Merry/Pip: *whump* *runs into Boromir* Save us! *both hide behind Boromir*

Boromir: Wha-? Uh…OH! *stands guard*

Frodo: *grrrrr*

Boromir: Hey, what’s goin’ on?

Frodo: (charges at Boromir with a look of vengence)

Boromir: stupid hobbit…(pulls Frodo up by his hair)

Frodo: I knew it!

Boromir: What is it you know? or, are you saying you no longer know it since you phrase it in the past tense?

Frodo: (blank stare)

Boromir: okay, obviously you mind is too small to comprehend. (mutters to himself: Still don’t know why they let you be the ringbearer…)

Boromir: huh, well, I don’t feel like holding you up anymore. *drops Frodo*

Frodo: OOPH! *is unconcious*

Pip: Hey man, thanks for saving our bacon!

Boromir: No prob. *laughs* Pip, all you think about is food!

Pip: HEY!

Merry: Hee hee AAAAH!

Sam: *charge!*

The three midgets “tackle” Boromir.

Pip: Ha ha! Not so tough now, are you Boromir?

Merry: Actually, he is pretty strong Pippin. Just check out all of his muscles…I’m jealous…

Sam: (squashed by the other two hobbits…again) Het mof!

Pip: What Sam?

Sam: Ooh are sit-hink ommee!

Merry: Oh look! Sam learned a new camoflauge trick! He can turn himself blue!

Pip: Yah! Just like a chameleon!

Merry: Wow, that was a big word buddy, you sure you can handle it?

Pip: Yeah yeah…very funny…Oh look! Sam is turnng purple!

Boromir: You guys, I don’t think Sam is intentionally changing colors…

Merry: Sure he is! I bet he could turn a whole bunch of colors, right Sam?…Sam?

Boromir: *hauls up Merry and Pip in on arm* *picks Sam up* *whistles*

Pip: Pound ‘im! *whump whump*

Pip: *suddenly squashed* Owch…

Merry: Told ya he was strong…you dum-dum (Pip)!

Boromir: Right …*deposits all hobbits in a pool*

Hobbits: That’s cold :*shiver shiver*

Boromir: Lovely is it not?! *grins and looks too cute for his own good*

Boromir: Uh oh…(o).o

Paulla: *weirdly pops in* Awwwww…MINE! *B. is nabbed by fangirl and is never seen again*

Hobbits: We feel vindicated now! * all smile*

Argie: *is now free* Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…

Hobbits: Oopie……..