It’s Raining Orcs!
Legolas and Gimli are standing on the walls of Helm’s Deep.
L: Tension is rising.
G: Morale is getting Low.
L: According to all sources.
Both: The field’s the place to go.
G: ‘Cause tonight for the first time
L: Just about half past ten
G: For the first time in history
L: It’s gonna start raining… Orcs!
Gimli gives him a ‘look’
The Orcs begin to attack with surprisingly Balletic moves.
Chorus:
Both: It’s raining Orcs!
Hallelujah!
It’s raining Orcs!
G (Spoken): That’s four!
Legolas gets a little carried away and runs out into the thick of battle.
L: I’m gonna go out
I’m gonna let myself get
Absolutely soaking wet!
An Orc jumping off a siege ladder slams into Legolas, knocking him into a heap on the floor.
G: God bless Evil Sauron.
I think he’s a fighter too.
Legolas picks himself up and dusts himself off.
L: He took over heaven
And he did what he had to do.
G: He bred Orcs and Goblins
And rearranged the sky
Both: So that each and every soldier
Can find the perfect fight!
Instrumental Chorus.
Legolas, Gimli, Orcs and Defenders break into complex, well rehearsed dance routine.
G + Defenders: It’s raining Ooooooooooorcs!!
L: Go outside, I know you want to!
G: I. Feel. Fierce. Fighting. Moving. In. About to begin.
Hear. The. War. Drums. Don’t. You. Lose. Your. Head.
Rip off their limbs and break their heads!
Defenders: Rip off their limbs and break their heads!
Repeat chorus to fade as Legolas and Gimli get swept away on the tide of battle, singing their little hearts out.