Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story (unfortunately) and I apologize if anyone doesn’t like the ways I portray the characters.

A/N: I’m really sorry it’s taking me so long to update. I’ve got a lot I’m doing right now (school, 2 jobs, etc.) so it might be a little while inbetween updates. But, I will update each chapter now, instead of waiting until I have the whole thing written to submit a new chapter. So, it shouldn’t take quite as long anymore.
A/N: Okay, this is my first fic, so don’t be too hard on me. Please review! Feel free to include HELPFUL criticism, suggestions, etc. (Actually please do include these.) Please refrain from using any profanity or obscenity in your reviews. Thanks.
A/N2: The first part may seem more like a serious action story, but it’ll get funnier later, when they all meet up.

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Middle Earth: Outside the Mines of Moria

Frodo: It’s a riddle! Gandalf, what’s the Elvish word for friend?
Gandalf: Mellon.
(taken from “The Lord of the Rings: the Fellowship of the Ring”)
*The doors to the Mines creak open. The Fellowship enters the mines slowly, most of them afraid of what they will find. They are so preoccupied that they all fail to notice the eerie mist thickening in the doorway.*

A Long Time Ago in a Galaxy Far, Far Away

*Obi-Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn are desperately fighting against Darth Maul on the catwalks in the infrastructure of Naboo’s palace. Darth Maul is good, perhaps better than the two of them combined. Suddenly, Darth Maul catches Obi-Wan off balance and knocks him off of the catwalk. This distraction allows Qui-Gon to kick Maul off as well. A strange fog begins to gather beneath the catwalks, a fog that Obi-Wan and Darth Maul are quickly nearing.*
Qui-Gon: What the–fog inside a palace!
*However, his confusion is quickly replaced by concern for his padawn, who is soon lost from sight in the mist, as is Darth Maul. Feeling a surge in Force, Qui-Gon jumps after the two, trusting the Force to let him land safely, even without being able to see anything in the murky fog.*

The Caribbean Sea: In a Lifeboat Heading Back to the Dauntless

Jack: They done what’s right by them. Can’t expect more than that. (taken from “Pirates of the Caribbean, the Curse of the Black Pearl”)
Will: Ummm, Jack, I don’t know if we’re going back to the Dauntless after all.
Jack: No, go on. There’s nowhere else to go anyway. I either starve, or I hang. At least hanging is bloody well faster.
Will: That wasn’t what I meant. I know it’s the only thing we can do, but… this fog… I can’t see two feet in front of me. I can’t tell where I am.
Jack: *Really looks around for the first time* Well when did this bloody fog come up? It was clear a few seconds ago!
Elizabeth: Just now, when Will said we can’t go back to the Dauntless.
Jack: First I lose my ship, now bloody Will loses his ship, what’s next? We lose the boat?
*Suddenly, the boat shudders as if it hit a rock. All three passengers are thrown out.*

The Fellowship

Gimli: Soon, Master Elf, you will enjoy the fabled hospitality of the dwarves (taken from “The Lord of the Rings: the Fellowship of the Ring”)
Legolas: *Does his best to ignore the dwarf while looking around with confusion. There shouldn’t be any fog in this cave!
Aragorn: Uh, Gimli?
Gimli: …My cousin, Balin…
Aragorn: Gimli?
Gimli: …and I haven’t seen him in years, but-
Aragorn: GIMLI!!!
Gimli: You don’t have to shout, laddie. I have the ears of a fox, you know.
*He turns back to Legolas, not realizing that the elf’s look of amazement is directed towards his surroundings–not towards Gimli’s narrative.*
Gimli: Yes, Balin was rather amazing, wasn’t he? Now, as I was saying-
Aragorn: Before you continue saying, why don’t you take a look around?
*Gimli looks around, notices what everybody else has already realized, and stares in shock.*
Gimli: What happened to the Mines?
Pippin: Well, Gandalf lit up his staff, and we all saw the fog, and then we all kept walking, and then the fog went away, and then we were here in this big open rocky area, and-
Gimli: But… what happened?
Gandalf: That’s what we’d all like to know.
Legolas: Look! The fog.
*The fog begins to appear about twenty feet in front of them, hovering about ten feet off the ground. Suddenly, a figure falls out of the fog, twisting to land on his feet just before he hits the ground.*
Legolas: *quietly, to Aragorn* He has the grace and agility of the elves, yet he is a man!

*further speculations are cut short as another figure hurtles out of the fog. Obi-Wan raises his lightsaber as the figure streaks towards him, then relaxes as he sees who it is.*
Qui-Gon: Where is the Sith, Obi-Wan?
Obi-Wan: *deactivates his lightsaber* I’m not sure, Master. I thought he would land right after me, but… actually I’m not even sure where we are.
Qui-Gon: I don’t know Obi-Wan, but the Force led me to jump after you, so we must somehow been teleported by the Force. Perhaps they know where we are.
Obi-Wan: *turns around to look at the Fellowship, startled.*
Qui-Gon: Be mindful of the Force. Had you been listening, you would have felt them there.
Obi-Wan: Yes, Master.
Pippin: Hello! Who are you? What were those glowing sticks? Where did you come from? Do you know where we are?
Qui-Gon: You mean you don’t?
Aragorn: No, we arrived out of a fog, much the way you did. It seems that something strange is at work here.

*A thump makes them all look to their left where a capsized boat has inexplicably appeared, along with three people who are picking themselves up off the ground.*
Jack: Where did all the bloody water go?
*The three new arrivals suddenly notice they aren’t alone*
Jack: What in the name of…
*He stops suddenly as everyone (including himself and Elizabeth) looks at Legolas, back to Will, then at Legolas again, then back to Will.*
Will: What? *catches sight of Legolas, who is staring at him in astonishment.*

Jack: (at same time as Pippin speaks) Will, why didn’t you bloody tell me you had a twin?
Pippin: (at same time as Jack spoke) Legolas! There’s two of you!
*Both Legolas and Will jump.*
Legolas and Will: Okay…. this is a little freaky.

Me: Alright, alright. This is fun and all, but you’re all here now, so time to get down to business.
Merry: Where’s that voice coming from?
Me: Right here, where’d you think?
Qui-Gon: Alright then, who are you?
Me: The author.
*Legolas and Aragorn give each other panicked looks*
Legolas: Oh no.
Aragorn: It can’t be!
Legolas: I think it is.
Aragorn: We seem to be in the Middle of another…
Legolas and Aragorn: FANFIC.
*Everyone gives strangles gasps of horror.*
Legolas: I almost always get turned into a prissy, snobby, idiotic, girly, sorry excuse for an elf!
Aragorn: And authors often make me an egotistical jerk! I don’t want to be king!
Qui-Gon: Who knows what terrors are now in store for us!
Me: IF you are all quite done now…
Gandalf: Alright, let’s get to the point. What is this one about, and can we get it over with?
Me: That’s what you have to find out.
Frodo: *hopefully* So…. you’re not going to do anything to us?
Me: Well, maybe…. hmmmm….
Boromir: *glaring in the general direction of my voice* Ah, come on, let’s just find a away out of here. She’s not going to do anything.
Me: Oh really? Just for that… *snaps fingers*
Legolas: *gives strangled gasp as he finds himself leaning against a motorcycle wearing black leather and sunglasses* What new devilry is this?
Boromir: Hey! That’s my line! *claps hands over his mouth as his voice comes out very high and squeaky*
Gimli: Noooooooooooooooooo! Not my beard! Where is it? What did you do with it?!
Gandalf: This is outrageous! I am Gandalf the Grey, not Gandalf the Pink!
Pippin: Merry, my feet are big.
Merry: All hobbits have big feet.
Pippin: But…
Merry: Pippin! I have my own problems. REAL ones! *Merry is frantically trying to stop shrinking, to no avail. He finally stops when he is 6 inches tall.* Ahhh! Don’t step on me!
Pippin: Sorry, but my feet are too big! It’s hard to walk right! *Trips over his feet, which are now literally as big as he is, missing Merry by an inch*
Frodo: It’s gone!
Sam: What is, Mr. Frodo?
Frodo: the one ring!
Sam: Actually, Mr. Frodo, it seems to have been turned into a belt. You’re wearing it.
Gandalf: *distracted from his absurdly colored robes* I can see the fiery letters! It says….
Sam and Frodo: What?
Gandalf: Can I have some pizza….
Sam: Well, I think I can arrange that, seein’ as how I’ve been turned into a pizza delivery boy.
Aragorn: Well, at least I seem to be okay….
Everyone else: *laughs*
Aragorn: What?
Everyone else: *laughs harder*
Aragorn: *finally notices the flashing neon lettering on his chest reading, “Yes I do want to be king!”* No! No I don’t! Take it off!
Jack: Where’s my pistol! It’s gone! And my hat! Give them back to me you bloody writer!
Me: Watch it or I’ll do something worse to you.
Elizabeth: Like, I seem okay. Okay, like, O my god, why am I talking like this? Ewww, it is, like, so totally annoying, but I like, can’t stop. Girl, will you, like, stop making me do this? It, like, totally sucks.
Will: Okay, I’ve decided that not all pirates are terrible evil people, but I don’t want to BE a pirate!
Me: Tough. Personally, I think the hat and the eye patch look rather dashing.
Obi-Wan: Master! You ‘re wearing a Padawan braid!
Qui-Gon: *reaches up to touch his hair, and finds it cut short except for a long, thin braid hanging over his right shoulder.* Yes, it would appear that the author has made me a Padawan learner again.
Obi-Wan: I appear to be the only one unaffected. I wonder why?
Me: laughing…too…hard…can’t…breathe…. *I get control of myself.* Muahahahahahaha. Don’t be so sure, Obi-Wan. *goes into another giggle fit over everyone else’s changes* must… come…back…later…for…next…chapter….

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What will happen next? What is the point/plot of this story? What happened to Obi-Wan? Find out in the next chapter!

(Okay that sounded really corny, but please review and tell me what you think, give suggestions, etc. And don’t worry, the next chapter should be better. This one was more of an introduction.)

A/N: Okay, I’m REALLY sorry it’s taking me so long to update. I’m still trying to figure out how to add another chapter, and what the details of my next chapter will be.

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