A Trip to Disney World: Middle-Earth Edition The Sequel! by Esmerelda~Baggins
Disclaimer: I don’t own LotR OR Disney World. I don’t own any of the attractions mentioned in here, either. Darnit…
The last time the Fellowship (and company) went to Disney World, it was rather chaotic. That was only the beginning.
“How about just burn them and say we lost?” Aragorn pleaded.
“You know we can’t do that!” Arwen argued, “Eldarion wanted to win that contest so badly! How could you dream of dashing his hopes?” Aragorn sighed. Eldarion, his son, had entered a contest to win 10 (yes, 10) tickets to Disney World for two days. It wasn’t the entering that bothered Aragorn, it was the winning.
“Arwen, I can’t survive two more days at Disney World!” Aragorn said, sheer-terror in his eyes.
“Aragorn, sweetie, we don’t have to take Gandalf if you can’t handle it,” Arwen smiled.
“What? Oh, well, that would help a little,” Aragorn decided. “But still! Two days and a night with 9 crazy nutballs?!”
“Aragorn! Watch what you say!” Arwen shouted, “Besides, it’s only 8. You counted me.” Aragorn rolled his eyes.
Soon Eldarion entered the room sniffing and coughing. “Mommy, I don’t feel good,” he said miserably.
“Oh, Eldarion, honey!” Arwen said, stooping down to feel her son’s forehead for a fever. “You’re burning up! Come on, let’s put you in bed. I’ll get you some soup and medicine.”
“You mean that purple stuff?!” Eldarion shrieked.
“Yes, the purple medicine that will make you all better so you can go to Disney World!” Arwen grinned.
“You mean I won?!” Eldarion asked in amazement.
“Yes, you did win. And that means you need to get all better in three days!” Arwen laughed. Aragorn groaned.
“Alright!” Eldarion exclaimed, “Bring on the purple poison! I’ll go to bed all day, if I have to! Where’s my teddy bear?”
Three days later, Aragorn had decided who he would risk taking.
Gandalf, luckily, couldn’t even come, because he apparently had to attend a Wizard’s Conference the same two days. The only problem was Eldarion was even sicker than he had been before.
“Aragorn! You can’t just leave the others hanging!” Arwen insisted. “Besides! Those tickets are worth a lot of money!”
No matter how much Aragorn begged, bribed, and even cried, Arwen didn’t back down. “You’ll just have to find two others to come,” she said.
Once Arwen’s mind was set on something, there was no changing it. Thus, Aragorn took a deep breath, and called Eomer and Eowyn.
“Alright!” Aragorn shouted over the nine shouting Humans, Hobbits, and Elf, “We are not leaving this parking lot until I’ve taken roll, and handed out snacks.” It wasn’t like Aragorn to be so organized, but since he was alone in this, he figured he should actually do something Arwen did when things got chaotic.
“First off,” he continued, “When I call your name I want you to answer “here”.” He glanced up briefly, then looked back down at his clipboard.
“Sir yes sir!”
“Good,” Aragorn sighed, “Now that that’s done, when I call your name, come get your snack, and get into the RV… again… Your snacks are grape flavored waters and slim jims. It’s a 6 hour drive to Disney World, and I’m not planning on making any more than three stops!”
Two minutes passed. “I’m hungry!” Pippin whined, “I ate all my food!”
“Well, now you know not to eat so fast,” Aragorn answered from the driver’s seat as coolly as possible.
“But-” Pippin was stopped with a loud, angry shush.
An hour later, Legolas was happily beating the 32nd level on his favorite game on his PSP. His eyes were set on the little man running around the screen, and he had a look of complete domination. So did Boromir. Silently sneaking up on the Elf, Boromir lunged at him and snatched the PSP. “Level 32, eh?” he grinned, holding the PSP above his head.
“Hey!” Legolas screamed, “Give it back!”
“You can have it, if you get it from me,” Boromir said evilly.
“Aragooooooooorn!!!” Legolas whined, “Boromir won’t give me back my PSP!”
Aragorn gritted his teeth and ignored the Elf.
Before Boromir knew what was happening, Pippin was flying through the air, straight at Boromir. He snatched the PSP as he passed by, then landed on both feet and one hand in a crouching position. Everyone gaped at Pippin’s feat. “What do you think you are, some kind of action hero?” Boromir smirked, trying to draw attention away from Pippin.
“In a way,” Pippin said, stepping out of his Took-ish ways for only a moment. After handing the PSP back to the very grateful Legolas, Pippin went back to his normal self; burying his head in the couch to look for food and quarters.
Three hours. Everybody was bored out of their brain. Including Aragorn. “Rest stop!” he shouted at last, pulling into a truck stop.
They all filed out, and soon everyone was running in every direction. “I wish Arwen was here…” Aragorn mumbled.
After around thirty whole minutes of doing basically everything disastrous possible, they all returned to the RV. After another roll call, the ten were all aloud back inside. This included Sam carrying a brochure from every single attraction in Florida. “Ah… Sam?” Aragorn said, “We’re only going to Disney World.”
“I know, Mr. Strider,” Sam said, “but since we didn’t have paper or blankets, we’re using these to make a tent.”
Aragorn looked bewildered, but he decided to let it go.
“Aragorn, I’m filing a complaint!” Eowyn raged. Aragorn leaned back in fear in his seat, gripping the steering wheel for dear life. When Eowyn was mad, boy was she mad. “I didn’t agree to come on this trip to a) be over twenty minutes off schedule, b) not know what resort we’re staying at, and c) not know where the heck we’re going once we get there!!!”
“Oh, yeah…” Aragorn said, remembering something rather important, “I did forget to say where we were going, didn’t I? Heh heh…”
All ears and eyes were set on Aragorn.
“Well, since Arwen planned all of this, let me tell you I had nothing to do with picking the places, including resort, we’re going to,” Aragorn said, “But, according to Arwen, we’re staying at The Caribbean Beach Resort, and we’re visiting Animal Kingdom and Epcot.” Moans were heard from the younger members of the group (and immature. Oh wait, that’s all of them.). Eowyn squealed with delight.
“Caribbean!” she gushed, “Oh! There must be beaches, and coconuts, and flowers…” her voice trailed off to the back of the RV.
The Hobbits were now watching a DVD in Frodo’s new DVD player. “Hobbits, I need you to clean up a little!” Aragorn called from the front.
“Aaaw, come on!” Pippin whined, “Spider Man’s about to fight these two guys!”
“Hey, aren’t we going to Disney World?” Eomer asked the Hobbit, “Why aren’t you watching a Disney movie?”
“That’s actually a good idea,” Merry said, pushing the ‘eject’ button, and putting in “Pirates of the Caribbean”.
“Ugh! I hate that movie!” Legolas whined, “Turn it down!”
“You only hate it ’cause that one guy looks like you,” Merry snapped.
“He posed off of me, obviously,” Legolas shouted, “Only he’s got a stupid mustache and reminds me of Aragorn!”
“What’s that supposed to mean?!” Aragorn demanded, swerving the RV a little.
“It means you’re a dirty, scruffy, smelly ranger!” Legolas yelled back.
“I’d watch what I said, if I were you,” Aragorn growled, “It wouldn’t take much effort for me to pull the RV over and throw you out!”
“Why not skip the pulling over?” Boromir asked, sending everyone else into fits of laughter. Legolas turned bright red with rage.
Soon Boromir had Legolas in a headlock and Eowyn was stealing Eomer’s pillow, resulting in Eomer and Eowyn starting a very immature pillow fight, which the Hobbits soon joined in.
Aragorn swerved the RV to the side of the road, sending everyone tumbling to the right side of the vehicle, and landing in a pile. “EVERYONE STOP!!!!!!!!” Aragorn screamed. Of course, everyone did. “We’ll never make it to the stupid resort if you guys don’t stop fighting!” he continued, “Now this is a warning: This was all Arwen’s idea, and if you guys can’t cooperate, I’m turning this RV around and we’re going back home.”
Everyone hung their heads. Faramir spit feathers out of his mouth.
“Does this mean we can’t watch our movie?” Frodo asked as innocently as possible.
Aragorn sighed, “You can only watch it if Legolas promises not to complain.” Legolas nodded. “Good,” Aragorn said, then returned to his normal driving routine.
Once Aragorn had his head turned, Legolas whacked Merry with a pillow, sending Merry flying across the RV. “Legolas!” Aragorn shouted, “I saw that! Go to the back of the RV, and stay there for an hour!”
“No!” Legolas said.
“Don’t make me come back there!” Aragorn threatened. Legolas shrunk back and retreated to the back of the RV, where he hid under a box that used to contain packs of chips for not 1, but 2 hours.
“I can see the entrance!” Pippin shouted, shoving his way to the front of the RV. “It’s Mickey!” Pippin pointed to the giant Mickey at the entrance.
Aragorn drove the RV through the entrance. “Eomer, erm… no, Boromir. I need you in the front seat!” he said.
Boromir hopped into the front seat. “Here, find our resort,” Aragorn ordered, handing Boromir a map.
After struggling with the giant piece of paper for a while, Boromir finally managed to point out the resort. Well, he thought it was the resort. Actually, it was a different resort, and it happened to be in the complete opposite direction.
“Boromir!” Aragorn was pretty mad, “You are very lucky we’re not on a tight schedule!”
The entire ride through the Disney territory, the Hobbits were glued to the windows. “Ooh!” Pippin squealed, “Look! Look! That fire station is painted all silly!” Frodo and Sam, who had been on the opposite side, rushed to the other side and plastered themselves next to Merry and Pippin.
Once they finally reached the Caribbean Resort, everybody grabbed their suitcases and ran to their assigned rooms.
Aragorn & Eomer
All of the Hobbits
Eowyn & Faramir
Legolas and Boromir
“I can’t stay in a room with this filthy human!” Legolas raged. “I demand my own room!”
“It’s a little late now,” Boromir said, “And it’s not like I wanted to share a room with you!”
“Shut up, you two!” Aragorn shouted, “Or I’ll kick you back to Mirkwood!”
Boromir slammed the door and Legolas threw his suitcase onto the bed on the left. He rummaged through it until he found his bathing suit.
After changing, everyone but Aragorn was running toward the pool. “Oh no you don’t!” Aragorn called to them from his room, “You’re not going swimming! Not after what happened last time!”
“We promise we’ll be good,” Frodo said, putting on his innocent face. The other three joined him.
Aragorn fought himself. He was desperate not to fall for it. But then his eyes landed on Frodo’s missing finger. That did him in. “Oh, alright,” he mumbled, “But stay out of trouble.” And with that he closed his door a little louder than necessary.
The nine all jumped into the pool at the exact same time. Well, eight. Eowyn refused to join. Instead she made her way to the hot tub.
The Hobbits were making their way to the slide. Frodo just happened to look back, and noticed there were quite a few girls behind them, all around the ages of twelve to twenty. He pushed the thought aside and continued to follow his fellow Hobbits. But once they reached the slide, he decided to look back once more. Now there were probably twenty girls behind them. He grabbed Merry’s arm and walked extra fast. “Merry,” he whimpered a bit, “Don’t look now, but I think we’re about to be attacked.”
“What?!” Merry questioned in shock. Immediately he made the mistake of looking, and making eye contact. The girls were instantly sent into a state that appeared as if someone had pushed a little “ON” button on them. They raced toward Frodo, Merry, and Pippin, and might as well have had hearts in their eyes. “RUN!!!” Merry cried. Pippin, still not sure what was going on, stopped in his tracks and turned around.
“EEEK!” he shrieked, and took off after Frodo and Merry. Sam just stood there, still waiting in line for the slide. Finally he made up his mind to follow his master, and took off after the fangirls.
As the Hobbits ran for their rooms, they noticed that Legolas, Boromir, Faramir, and Eomer were having the same problem. But mostly Legolas.
As they all raced to their rooms, they heard those horrifying screams of “Leggy! Marry me!!!” “I love you, Frodo!!!” and “Merry, size doesn’t have to matter!!!” Yes, it was certainly nightmarish.
Once they reached the rooms, they dead bolted their doors and collapsed into bed. Luckily they had enough food to last the night.
I hope you liked it! Please please please review!