Disclaimer: Before I go into my story I need to clear some things up.
First, all the characters in this story (except Engel) are Tolkien’s not mine.
Second, Eowyn one of my favorite characters (along side Pippin) so if you feel I have placed her in a bad light (though I don’t think you will) that was not my intent.
Third, I made Theodred a lot younger just to make his character a little closer in age to Eomer, or else he would have been 18 when Eowyn was born and I wanted him a little closer in friendship to Eowyn and Eomer.
Fourthly, this story will be told from first person after the first chapter. I really couldn’t do it first person in the first chapter because it is extremely difficult to write from a baby and a toddler’s perspective, since, alas, I cannot remember what I thought then.
Fifthly, I appologize if Eowyn’s thoughts seem a little chaotic and contridictory but you have to realize that she is somewhat young and also she is going through a time of complete confusion, so she is just trying to make up her mind.
Sixthly (I know this is a lot) In the third chapter, Eowyn may seem a little grown up for being 7. I’m sorry. It just worked out that way. Oh and also with chapter three and I think four and five will be this way as well, they are tradgedies (sp?). So if you really don’t like reading sad stuff, then don’t read those. Sorry I couldn’t really get around it.
Seventhly, this isn’t a plagerism of a fanfic on warofthering.net. On that site I am Ancalime and I wrote this, I have just copied it onto this site. I am the same person so I have all the rights to this story.

Please enjoy this story and pretty please review.
Pip the Fool of a Took

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~December 19, FA 69~

Many people, when they are old and contemplative, look back at their life and regret choices they made or actions they were forced to take. Many times they wish they had been more outgoing and adventuresome in their youth.

Now I look back and see a fantasy, full of pain and sadness, but ending happily ever after. I look at my choices and actions, and know that no matter how much I regret them now, if they had not come to pass exactly the way they did, I would not be the happy person I am today.

I started out my adventure of life with nothing but a name. As I grew I built up slowly, but it all came soon crashing down on top of me. I resolved to build myself a name that would go down in history, and I suceeded. It was an uphill battle the entire way, but I was victorious. I am Eowyn, daughter of Eomund and Theodwyn, sister-daughter of former King Theoden, sister of King Eomer Eadig, former Third Marshal of the Riddermark, wife of Faramir, Steward of Gondor, and mother of Boromir III and Elanya. But almost more important than these I believe are the titles I earned myself; White Lady of Rohan, Lady of the Shield Arm, Witch King’s-bane, Sheildmaiden of Rohan.

This is my story.

~January 24, 2995~

The sun reached its zenith in the sky, giving minimal heat to the blustery, snow covered valley formed by the intersection of the two small mountain ranges part of the Great White Mountains. In the center of this valley was a large knoll, upon which was seated a great city, the capital of Rohan. The great hall which sat at its peak could be seen even from great distances. The intercite golden sun which reflected from the sun onto the snow, making a blinding beautiful image.

Besides all its beauty however, the location of Edoras had its setbacks. The main one was the wind. The shape of the momentous valley was just right to send winds speeding along very quickly, racing for its unknown destination.

My people, the Rohirrim of Edoras, however, were used to this natural occurance, and knew when it was safe to battle the wind’s might or surrender to the cozy thatched houses away from its wrath.

On this particular day the wind was not too swift, although to a small three year old, it was a struggle to stay on one’s feet.

Little Eomer raced up the winding paths of Edoras going as fast as his short, stubby legs could carry him. The entire way was a battle. Physically, to remain upright and moving and also mentally, whether to focus on his anger at his mother forcing him to wear what seemed like twenty layers of furs, or to focus his thoughts on what his new baby brother would be like. Panting for breath, he rushed onward, vapor billowing out of his smiling mouth as he decided on the later idea. He was a big brother now. Finally someone he could play and wrestle with. Someone he could get into trouble with.

The message had come to him while he had been playing on the outer wall. Now he could finally see that new little baby who had been inside Mama’s tummy for the last nine months! Finally his little bro-

WHAM!!

Not having looked where he was going he had run straight into his cousin. Theodred was a whole nine years older than Eomer, so his size naturally overcame the little boy. Both boys were sent sprawling, Theodred landing right on top of Éomer.

“Gerrofff!”

Eomer rolled off his older cousin mumbling his apologies. Theodred struggled to stand, dusting himself off.

“Come on let’s go.”

The little boy instantly forgot the small setback. “Yes! Yes! My little brother has finally come!”

“Hold on there, scout. How do you know it’s going to be a boy?”

“Because I want it to be!” Eomer called over his shoulder as he ran off to his house.

“I wouldn’t count on it,” Theodred mumbled as he raced after his quick, younger cousin. “I wanted you to be a girl so I wouldn’t get tackled every time I tried to stand, but did I get my wish?”

*************************************************************

Eomer burst into the small dark room, right into his father’s arms.

“Slow down there, Eomer,” Eomund lightly chastised his son.

“Where is he? Is he here yet?” The little boy bounced up and down trying to see past his father’s tall form.

“Yes, she is here.”

Eomer stopped bouncing.

“She?”

“Yes she. We’re trying to decide what to name her.”

“Her?”

“I told you not to count on it being a boy.” Theodred came up behind him, panting a little.

Eomund smiled, and gave his son a slight nudge. “Go on. See what she looks like.”

Eomer crept into the dimly lit room where Theodwyn sat holding the newborn babe in her arms. Her brother, Theoden stood behind her, admiring his new niece. Theodwyn looked up at her son, a weak smile hovering on her lips.

“Do you want to hold her?” Theodwyn asked her son.

The young boy looked in wide-eyed amazement at the even younger girl.

“Can I?” he whispered.

“If you sit really still,” his mother cautioned as she carefully passed the baby over to her son.

“She’s so light.”

Theodwyn smiled and nodded.

Eomer handed the baby back to his mother. “You can have her back now.” He was somewhat afraid of dropping her. He did not want to break this precious bundle.

“Oh, alright.”

“Can I touch her?”

“If you are careful,” the mother patiently repeated.

Eomer passed his hand over the small rib cage. He could feel the baby’s small heart pounding away. H placed his hand on his own cheast feeling his own heart thmping, too.

Theodwyn sat in silent amusement watching her son explore this new thing. He carefully lifted the thing blanket covering the baby’s face. Solemn grey eyes blinked back at him. He smiled and cocked his head to one side.

“Hello there, little sister,” he said to his new sibling in the ogly baby coice that all humans seem to adopt around infants.

He looked up to see his father and cousin also watching him from the doorway. Eomer rushed into Eomund’s arms, peering into his father’s eyes.

“You’ve go the same kinds of eyes she’s got.”

Eomund laughed. “I think I had them before she did, though.”

Theoden looked up at Eomund a proud smile alighting his face. “Have you decided upon a name yet?”

“No. I was waiting for Eomer,” Eomund responded. “What do you think her name should be, son?”

The small boy sat thinking for a moment and then suddenly came up with an idea, remembering his history lesson from the other day. “Hild! Just like Helm’s sister, ’cause I’m gunna grow up to be a great warrior, just like Helm.” He raced around the room making sword noises and swinging his arms like he was fighting thousands of orcs.

The adults smiled at the ambitious child, and let him play for a minute. However when he got too close to the baby, Eomund deciede to arrest his son’s roleplaying. “All right there warrior, that’s enough. You want her name to be ‘battle’? I think that’s what we should have named you. I was thinking a more peaceful name like Leofa, ‘dear’.”

Theodwyn shook her head. She knew she had the final say, but she didn’t like those names. They were too fate deciding. A warrior or a darling? No she wanted her daughter to choose her own destiny not the name her parents gave her. She needed the perfect name for her little joy. She smiled a sudden idea coming into her mind.

“She will be called Eowyn.” She tickled the little infant’s nose playfully.

“Eowyn?” her husband and her son said in unison.

Theodwyn held the small child up. “Yes. Eowyn. My horse joy.”

~April 30, 2997~

Theodwyn stood at the top of the stairs leading to the Golden Hall, looking around. She could see the melting snowcaps of the White Mountains, and the rolling plains surrounding the knoll on which Edoras sat. The sun was just starting to fall and the moon was already out. The sky was a beautiful cascade of colors. Yet no matter how beautiful her surroundings, she had her gaze fixed upon one thing she considered more beautiful than it all. Her small daughter was runnning around in the tall grass, playing tag with some of the older children. The little two year old had been hassling her all day. It was good for her to go out and get some fresh air and exersize. Eowyn’s short, stubby toddler legs could not keep up with the older children’s strides, but she raced on not caring about the widening gap forming between her and all the other boys and girls. Theodwyn smiled at the small girl’s gold-blonde hair streaming out from behind her.

“She has her mother’s lovely hair,” a voice said softly behind her.

Theodwyn did not even have to turn to know who the voice belonged to. “Yes, brother. I would have to say it runs in the family.”

Theoden smiled, and put an arm around his younger sister. “Yes, family,” he said in a far off voice. “I think that I must be the luckiest man alive to have a family like this one.”

Theodwyn tweaked his cheek playfully. “Hmmm… I wouldn’t be too sure of that. Raising a two-year-old, a five-year-old, and a fifteen-year-old is not the easiest thing in the earth.”

Theoden smiled back at her. “I never said it was easy.”

They both laughed and turned their attention back to the little girl romping around in the grass. Now far behind everyone else, Eowyn had given up the chasing and was now simply skipping around. Suddenly she tripped and fell tumbling down a small hill. Theodwyn gasped and gathered up her skirts preparing to race down and help her little girl. Before she got down even two steps, Eowyn was back up and frolicking as though nothing had happened. Her mother gave a sigh of relief.

“She has got some spirit,” Theoden commented. “It would break my heart to see that spirit quenched.”

“It would take some force to quench her fire.” Theodwyn smiled and then climbed back up to the Golden Hall. “Come on. Let’s find something to eat. I hope your son hasn’t eaten everything in the store rooms.”

Theoden laughed, as he followed his sister into the great hall. There was no denying the unquenchable appetite of the growing teenager. “I don’t know. Last time I checked, Eomer was challenging Theodred’s dominion of the kitchens.”

~September 12, 2998~

“No! I wan’ Papa!” I kicked and screamed while my mother looked to my uncle for support.

Theoden crouched down to look at me face to face. “Eowyn, your Papa had to go. I know you don’t like it, but even when he’s gone, you have to go to bed. He would want you to.”

I crossed my arms and pouted at him. “‘N what if he comes back while I be asleeped? He told me to wait fer him.” I sat firmly on the floor resolutely.

My mother sighed behind me. I suddenly saw my uncle smile. He sat down next to me and whispered in my ear, “Eowyn, do you want to hear a secret?”

I loved secrets. I snuggled up nest to him whispering back at him. “What?”

“I heard your mother has a secret plan to make you stay awake, and not go to bed. Do you know why?” I shook my head, and he leaned closer. “Because she wants you to get sick so she can give you some of her yummy tonic all day.”

I made a face, sticking my tongue out. I hated Mama’s tonic. Once I had a really bad fever and she gave me some. I am positive it made me even sicker. It also tasted super nasty.

Theoden leaned even closer to me. “How about we don’t let her complete her plan and run up to bed?” I nodded vigorously and raced up to my room, diving under my covers and pretending to snore, just to confirm to my mother I was asleep. I didn’t want any of Mama’s horrible medicine!

***********************************************************************

I woke up in the middle of the night, to the sound of the door slamming shut.

“Eomund!” I heard my mother cry.

My eyes widened and I leapt out of bed. Papa was home! “Pa-”

My shout was cut short by my brother’s hand clamping over my mouth. He put a finger to his lips, cautioning me to be quiet.

A game, I thought, as I mimicked him by putting my own small finger up to my own lips.

He nodded and smiled. Then he beckoned me to follow, as he tiptoed over to a crack in the floorboards. He lay down, putting his eye up against the peephole. I squirmed next to him, wanting to see, too. He didn’t budge. I ran out of patience pushing him out of the way, so I could see.

I got a brief image of my father sitting with his head in his hands, and my mother standing behind him, her arms draped over his shoulders. It was cut brief however when Eomer shoved me back.

“This is my hole! Go find your own,” he hissed. I didn’t understand. Hadn’t he wanted me to follow him and stay quiet?

But I didn’t argue, and went off in search of my own crack.

I found one not too far off but unfortunately all I could see was a wall. I then pressed my ear against the fracture, finding that I could hear my parents perfectly.

“Eomund, please talk to me. What happened?” my mother was saying.

“They’re gone, all gone,” my father was moaning. “Massacred by those demonic pigs.” I did not understand half of the words my father said but the tone in his voice sent the message clearly. A voice I knew so well and yet now it seemed foreign.

I could plainly hear the fear in my mother’s voice. “Who?”

“Everyone, in Ml-” My father’s voice broke. “In that small, inconspicuous corner of the Westfold. Where I grew up. The place that men can hardly find much less orcs.” He spat the name out like a curse word. I could hear in his voice that he was on the verge of tears, just barely holding back. “But they did. They did, and we came too late. Too late to save any of them. Not any of my neighbors, my friends, not even my own pare-” He broke into sobs.

I had never before heard my father cry. It was an unsettling feeling. The rock you had clung to for your entire life, beginning to wobble. I couldn’t take it any more. I had to comfort him.

I leapt up to run downstairs and again was held back by my older brother. I turned and tried to bite him. I wanted to go to Papa!

A cold hard voice made us both freeze. I had thought that my father’s voice was foreign before but now it was entirely alien. It had a bitter edge that sent my blood cold. At the age of three I had never heard the sound of a warrior’s speech before battle, not the ramblings of a man talking in vengeance about a great foe.

“I hate them!” my father cried. We could hear him clearly through the floorboards, as if he was in the same room as us. “I hate them!!!!!” There was a clatter of metal as my father threw his sword across the room.

His next words were no less chilling but instead of a cry he said them in a snarl that we could barely hear. “Oh, how the orc will wish he had never set foot in that part of Rohan. Just as all the orcs there perished at my wrath, so will all others who enter the country of Rohan or any of its domains. I, Eomund, son of Hefara swear this on the graves of my parents.” He stormed out of our house, slamming the door behind himself.

I looked at Eomer, and him at me, shock written all over both our faces. No nightmare could have frightened me more than the vengeance filled voice of my father.

My brother and I both dived back into our beds, anxious to be back asleep and praying the whole incident was just a dream.

It wasn’t however. Though I did not know it then, what I had witnessed then would greatly affect me later. Then however I wanted everything to forget that cold, hard voice that reminded me of my father and yet at the same time was so different. The memory didn’t leave for a very long time, and when it finally departed, the whole incident was forgotten completely.

~January 24, 3002~
I popped quickly up in my parent’s big, quilted bed, looking frantically around. At first I was puzzled as to why I wasn’t in my own bed. Then I remembered that the night before I had been far too excited to go to bed, so my parents had agreed I could sleep with them as long as I would calm down. I had agreed.

Now I laid wandwiched between the two sleeping adults. I frowned as I queitly snuck over the motionless form of my mother. I tiptoed over to the windo, pushing the tapestry to one side and looking out. The sun was just rising. The sun was just rising. I frowned again. That meant most likely no one was up.

I scowled. I couldn’t possibly wait till everyone was awake.

A loud groan from the next room interrupted my thoughts. Maybe someone was up, after all!

I scampered into the next room, excitedly. My brother lay on his bed, his chest still rising slowly and evenly in slumber. I had to check, though.

I gently tapped his hand. “Eomer?” I hissed.

He subconciously swatted at me. “No…no..it’s all min. I’m not sharin’ today,” he mumbled, obviously dreaming.

I held back a giggle as I backed out of his room. I listened to see if anyone else in my house was up as of that moment. Not a sound. I sighed and walked outside.

That winter had been oddly warm. Even though it was dawn on a January morning, it could have been an afternoon in May, as far as weather went.

I walked down the paths, humming a silly dittly Theodred had taught me a couple days earlier. I climbed up on the great wooden walls that gaurded Edoras. Sitting and dangling my short legs through the railing I stared in awe at the amazing sunrise. The array of colors took my breath away.

“Pretty isn’t it?” The voice nearly made me jump out of my skin.

I turned. “Don’t do that!”

My best friend smiled back at me. “Sorry.”

I turned my focus back to the sunrise. “So you couldn’t sleep either, huh?”

“Nope. How could I? I’m just as excited as you are.” She sat down next to me.

I looked over at Engel. She had been my best friend since I couldn’t remember how long. Most people who didn’t know us that well thought we were twins. Sure, our hair was about the same llength and color but our faces didn’t look anything alike. She had deep brown eyes where I had sea grey ones. However, we hung around each other so much we used the same mannerisms, and acted the same whay. I could know what she was thinking just by looking at her face, and vice versa. A strange thing was that we had the same birthday, though she was a year older than I was.

“I heard Mama talkin’ ’bout ponies. Do you think we’ll get our own this year?”

Engel squirmed with delight. Her brown eyes reflected the rising sun. “Oh I do hope so. Eomer got his when he turned seven, right? I know my parents have been waiting till you got one, then they promised I could have one, too.”

“Yep. Eomer got his the day before he turned seven. He named it Felarof. He said it was the name of Eorl’s horse, or something like that.” We laughed at the thought of naming a pony after a mearas. “Have you thought about what you are going to name your pony? If you get one I mean.”

Engel pondered this for a minute, staring at the distant mountains. “I suppose I’ll have to wait and see.”

I sighed. “Yeah me, too.”

We sat there silent for a few more minutes watching the sun fully rise.

Suddenly I was swept up, high in the air, landing firmly on a broad pair of shoulders. Engel and I both giggled. My uncle had snuck up behind us, giving us a minor fright. I now sat perched on his shoulders, with Engel running around at his feet.

“What are you two doing up so early?”

“We couldn’t sleep,” Engel shouted up at him.

Theoden put on a face of confusion. “Why’s that, I wonder?”

“‘Cause it’s our birthday!” Engel and I shouted together.

“Oh, that’s right. I almost forgot.”

Engel and I giggled at the thought of the King forgetting our birthday.

He continued, ignoring us. “I don’t know, I think they’ve slept long enough. What do you girls think?”

Engel and I grined. “Yeah!”

We ran inside, waking anyone who wouldn’t clobber us.

***********************************************************************

“Can we open our eyes now?”

“Not yet,” Eomer called from somewhere to my right.

“How about now?” Engel said. She was walking right beside me.

“Just hold out for about another minute,” my mother’s always calm voice said from behind me.

We patiently trecked onward guided by our families.

“Okay now you can open your eyes,” Engel’s father informed us.

We opened our eyes and found ourselves standing in the middle of the Edoras stables. In front of us stood two ponies. We rushed up to them squeeling with delight.

“Oh are they really ours Mama?” I asked.

“Yes, my love. The white one is Enge”s and the brown one is yours. We have de-”

Eomer interrupted his mother. “What are you going to call them?”

I skrewed up my face in thought. Engel beat me to it.

“I’m going to call mine Stybba.”

I held back a laugh. “Stybba? Doesn’t that mean ‘stump’, or something like that?”

Engel smiled and lovingly patted the pony’s mane. “Yep. ‘Cause he is a little stump. What are you going to name yours?”

“Hmmm… I think I shall call her Morgen.”

“Morgen? And you thought my name was weird. At least mine fit. Why would you name your pony ‘morning’?”

I brushed some snarls out of my pony’s mane with my fingers. “Yes. Morning. Because she’s just as beautiful as that sunrise this morning.”

Our fathers crouched down in front of us giving us a stern, playful look. “All right you two. Although we feel that you are responsible enough to have your own ponies, there are going to be some rules you will have to follow. All right?”

Engel and I mocked saluted him. “Yes, sirs!”

Engel’s father stood tall. “All right. First of all, they are all your full responsibility. You will be fully in charge of feeding, watering and cleaning up after your pony.”

“Yes, sir!”

My father also stood. “Also we will not have you riding about the countryside alone, so I will have to be home, or Engel’s father will have to be home, for you to go outside of Edoras. All right?”

I frowned. Father was away a lot, so that would mean we would hardly ever get to ride around the plains.

My father saw the face I made and repeated sternly. “All right?”

I sighed. “Yes, sir.”

“Other than that I can think of no other rules to burden you down with. What do you say we take them for a little ride right now.”

I smiled again. “Yes, sirs!!” Engel and I chorused.

~January 28- February 7, 3002-~

Engel and I both sat on the great stairs to the Golden Hall bored half to death. Both my father and her father were away, so we couldn’t do the one thing in the world we both wanted to do right then. Ride our ponies across the plains.

I sighed and put my head in my hands. “I wish we could go out riding by ourselves. Sometimes parents can be so annoying.”

Engel sighed. “Yeah.”

I got up and stretched. “Well we might as well go inside. Maybe my uncle will take us riding.”

Engel brightened at this new idea. “Yeah. Maybe!”

We both ran inside.

***********************************************************************

“I’m sorry, girls. I am busy right now. I am expecting a company from Snowbourn this afternoon and I cannot risk missing it.”

We trod off unhappy. I tried to make the best of the situation. “Well, maybe Father will come home tomorrow. Then we can go. I mean, the longer we have to wait, the more excited we’ll be then. The more excited we are the more fun we’ll have.”

Engel sighed. “I suppose you’re right. Let’s go see if we can find some cloth and make some dolls or something.”

I shrugged. It was better than nothing. “Alright.”

***********************************************************************

My mother found us before we found the cloth. However she was happy to supply us with more than we needed, plus some straw to stuff them with. She showed us how to cut out the patterns and sew them just right, so that they could bend and move as much as we wanted to. We gave her our thanks and hurried away to a secluded place where we could play.

“”Well Niara, how art thou faring today?'” I said in my high, “sophisticated” voice, pretending to be the voice of my doll.

“‘Not very well Yvanna. I am bored out of my mind,'” Engel said, matching my high pitched voice.

I wiggled my doll in a way that I though could be confusion. “‘What art thou talking about my friend?'”

“‘There is nothing to do. And I am sick of standing around doing nothing!'”

“Well what dost thy wish to do?'”

“‘I wish to go gallivanting around the countryside on my fair pony, Stybba.”

“Then why don’t you?” The sneering voice suddenly sounding from behind us, made us nearly jump out of our skins.

“Go away, Grima.” Engel’s voice was cold as she addressed our interrupter. Grima was two years older than Theodred, so fifteen years older than us. His father was my uncle’s advisor, and he was learning the trade, too. He was a lot bigger than us, though in my opinion he was a lot uglier too. He had medium length black hair and an unsightly wart above one eye. He barely went outside so his skin was a pale whitish color. We were totally repulsed by him though sometimes his words made sense.

He put his hands up in mock surrender. “All right. All right. I was just naturally inquiring why you would spend your day moping around here, instead of being free, riding around the country side, on your new ponies.”

“Because my father said we can’t, that’s why. Now go before, I hit you.”

“Ohh, I’m sooo scared. So it’s just an old man’s silly rules He’ll never know. You could go out, come back, no one would be the wiser.”

Engel looked at me uncomfortably. “He’s right you know.”

I squirmed uncomfortably. I didn’t like breaking my father’s rules.

Grima smiled in triumph. “It’s your choice. I won’t tell anyone.” He walked away.

I sat staring at his receding figure, with a death grip on my doll.

Engel looked at me and sighed. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

I felt challenged, like she was thinking I was too afraid to disobey my father. “No, I want to. Let’s go.””

***********************************************************************

Laughing and screaming, we rode out in the middle of the plains, halfway between Edoras and the Misty Mountains.

“Race you to the top of that knoll, Eowyn!”

“You’re on!”

I kicked the sides of my pony, racing up the hill. Engel got their first and dismounted. She flung herself on the ground. I leapt off my pony and landed next to her.

“This isn’t so bad.”

“No. I don’t see why Papa thought we couldn’t go out by ourselves.”

We sat there in silence for several more minutes, watching the sun set.

“Eowyn, it’s starting to get dark, let’s go back.”

“No, we can stay out a little longer. It’ll be okay.”

Engel frowned and went to Stybba’s saddlebag. She took out a loaf of bread, and breaking it in half she tossed one half to me. We sat munching for several more minutes and then silently deciding it was time, we mounted our ponies and headed back to Edoras.

It was not long before it became completely dark. We continued to ride… and ride… and ride and ride forever it seemed.

“Eowyn?” Engel’s scared voice broke the silence. “I think we should have reached Edoras by now. Maybe we got turned around.”

I was beginning to get worried too. How could I have been so stupid?!? “Let’s veer a little to the left.”

We rode on, and on… and on. Nightly noises began to sound all around us. I was by now very frightened.

Suddenly to our right a loud scream echoed through the night.

“Engel?!?” I shouted.

“I-I’m r-rrrrrright hhhhere,” Engel chattered from my left.

Then all around us howls and screams filled the air. All the ghost stories my brother had ever told me sprang to mind. Above all of those however rose the ghastly, but true, stories my father told my mother, with me and my brother listening through the door. The stories of orcs and uruks. The mutated monsters that Sauron created to do his bidding. I shivered.

“Khajay coklin tagyth da tanpklyn!” A loud voice rose above all the other yells. Now there was no doubt in my mind they were orcs. Then suddenly torches were lit all around us. How I wished I had brought along my brother’s knife! That was the only weapon I trusted myself with.

I could see their hideous faces dancing around in the firelight. They were running right along side of us! I spurred Morgen onto a faster speed, seeing Engel do the same, hoping desperately they didn’t have bows. My hope proved in vain.

Abruptly my pony lurched and fell, throwing me off. I rolled and rolled, feeling as though every bone in my body was broken. However I suddenly heard a sound that made me forget my own pain. Engel’s scream cut through the night like a knife through butter. I leapt up to see Stybba still running, in fear away, but Engel lying on the ground with a dark, ugly orc arrow sticking out her back. Out of my perifrial vision I could see Morgen lying dead a few meters off but it didn’t register. I raced over to where my best friend fell, tears streaming down my cheeks.

“Engel… Engel… no!”

The orcs circled us warily at a distance, not sure of the situation and not willing to risk it.

When I reached my friend, I rolled her over holding back a scream when I saw her situation. Blood was streaming down her back. Her face was pale and her eyes were fading.

“Eowyn… Eowyn… Don’t leave me. Don’t let them get me!”

Sobs welled up in my throat.

“I won’t. Don’t worry, I will protect you.” I didn’t feel the words I said. I was as shaky as a leaf and inside I felt like soup.

Engel must have proceived this, I have no idea how, but she whispered something I could never forget for the rest of my life. “Courage, Eowyn. Courage for your friend.” And with that she breathed her last. If not for those words we both would have probably died that night.

Urged by some internal instinct I dove flat, a knife whizzing over my head and quivering in the ground right in front of me. Resolve hardened inside me, and I grabbed the knife by the handle yanking it out of the ground. Positioning myself over Engel’s dead body I whispered a prayer, trying to stop my stomach from flopping around.

“Bema, please aid me.” I snarled at the surrounding orcs preparing myself to fight for my life.

The need never came. From just to the left of me a loud whinny sounded followed by the war cry of Rohan.

“Forth Eorlingas!!!!!!!!”

The brief moment of my bravery died at hearing my father’s strong voice. I threw the knife over my shoulder and leapt into a small ravine, dragging with me Engel’s body, knowing we would be trampled if we stayed out there.

Then the full reality of what had happened hit me. Engel was dead. She was not coming back. Though there was a great battle going on outside, I didn’t notice. I was too wrapped up in my own mourning.

There would be no more bright smiles. No more laughs, or giggles at little jokes. No more birthdays celebrated together. No more pulling pranks on my older brother and cousin. Engel had been my best friend for my whole life, and now she was gone. Gone. Gone. Never coming back.

I hugged her close and wept, wishing desperately that this was just a bad dream and I would wake up, and she’d be there, and we’d still have fun. I was so numb with grief I hardly noticed my father pulling me out from the ravine and taking Engel from me. I was so grateful that he wasn’t punishing me for going off on our own. It was all my fault! She had given me the decision. I had accepted it. She had wanted to go back earlier. I had insisted on staying out. I had listended to that snake Grima’s words.

My head shot up. It was his fault! I promised myself then and there that I would never listen to anything that worm said ever again.

Totally wrapped up in my own thoughts I didn’t even notice that I was riding in front of my father and we were going back to Edoras. On the way they found Stybba and roped him to my father’s horse.

Numbly I was placed back in my bed and I fell into the uncomfortable silence of sleep.

***********************************************************************

The next week was just a dull blur of grief, mourning, and pain. It turned out that having fallen from my pony at full gallop was not the best thing for my body. I had several cracked ribs and my legs were all bruised from the impact of the fall.

However, this pain was nothing compared to the piece torn from my heart and the void left in its place. Everywhere I went, no matter what I did, I would always be painfully reminded of the absence of my best friend. Half of me wanted to go visit Stybba, so we could both, in a sense, mourn together, though the prevailing half decided it would be too painful to see Engel’s old pony.

I decided to try and block this all out by covering it up. I went about practicing sword play as if there was no tomorrow. I was determined not to let my helplessness hurt someone ever again. I nagged Eomer day after day to teach me, practice with me, do anything with me just to cover up the void. When Eomer was too busy I would ask my father. When Father was too busy I would ask Uncle Theoden. Around in this circle I would work until I dropped from exhaustion and couldn’t work, couldn’t even think.

My parents began to become worried at my situation, though they were careful not to show it. Everyone treated me very nicely, because they all knew of Engel’s death. I could get away with almost anything, though I had no wish for trouble anymore. It was finally my cousin who broke through me.

“Eowyn, you have got to stop acting like this!”

“Like what?” I replied bitterly.

“Like Engel’s death is the end of the world. It is not. Do you think she would be acting like this if you had died and she had lived?”

I turned to walk away. “I should have died, and she should have lived.”

Theodred grabbed me and twisted me so I had to look him in the eyes. “Why is that?”

I broke down. Tears streamed from my cheeks, and because Theodred was holding me I couldn’t wipe them away. “Because it was all my fault. I decided to break Papa’s rules to go out. I decided to stay out after dark. It was my fault, all my fault she’s dead.” My words hung bitter in my mouth. “If she had been on her own, none of this would have happened, if-if..” I couldn’t finish. Sobs, that had been pushed down, now came free.

Theodred pulled me close, running his hand through my hair. “No, no. Eowyn listen to me. We cannot change the past, so we have make the best of it. Ifs are not going to bring Engel back. Nothing will. But you can still remember all the fun times you had with her. Can you do that?” I nodded weakly. “It will make you feel much better. I do not think Engel would have wanted you just to stop your life just where she left. She would want you to live the rest of your life to the fullest, not moping about here, trying to become what you are not. Becoming a warrior is not going to bring her back.”

I ran my sleeve across my cheeks. I sniffed once more. “Thank you Theodred. I do feel much better. How do you know so much?”

“Because my mother died when I was born, and I went through the same thing as you when I found out. What I just told you was what my father had told him. Death is a part of life. It is not all bad, and suffering. If you were true friends, nothing can separate you. Not even death.” He walked away, as I contemplated his last words.

~February 28, 3002~

A month after the day Engel died, my father called me into the stable. I had taken on Stybba as my own pony though I didn’t ride him as much as Engel had in those several days he had been hers. I thought my father was calling me in because I had done something wrong in taking care of the pony.

“What is it Papa?”

My father looked at me through solemn eyes. “Eowyn. In the past month I have seen you mature more than anyone I know at your age.”
He paused. I looked at him expectantly.

“You have taken more care of Stybba, than I did with my first pony. I am very proud of you. I also assume that you have learned your lesson about my second rule?”

I nodded my head sadly. My father took a deep breath.

“Then Eowyn, my daughter, I would like to give you your horse.” My eyes widened in disbelief. Children weren’t supposed to get a horse until they were at least ten. I ran up and hugged my father tight.

“Oh thank you Papa, thank you. Where is he? Or is it a she? Can I see her now? Can I?” My father smiled. He had not seen me this happy since Engel died.

“Yes, of course. It is a she, but she’s just a filly, so you’ll have to help raise her.”

I squirmed with delight. “Oh where is she Papa? I want to see her!”

My father lead me over to a stall where a beautiful mare stood guard over her shaky baby. My heart softened at the little creature who was practically all legs. She had black, fuzzy fur and a grey mane.

“Can I go in and pet her Papa?” I whispered.

“If your careful not to upset her mother.”

I slowly opened the gate, and crept in. The mother stared at me, as if daring me to try and harm her baby. However I first went to her, and rubbed her face, whispering soothing words to her. She would have to trust me herself first, before she would let me go anywhere near her baby. I decided that I would probably not be able to touch the baby for at least a week. Building up trust with a horse is a long process, but it is not easily broken. I looked behind the mother’s legs to where my own filly lay. She opened her eyes and looked at me. I smiled back. I decided that I would raise this baby into the perfect horse, completely obedient and loyal to me. I backed slowly back out of the stall where my father stood waiting.

“You were smart not to try and touch the baby too soon.”

“What’s her mama’s name?”

“Thalena. What are you going to call her baby?”

I had made up my mind when I looked into the filly’s big brown eyes. “Engel.”

~November 5, 3002~

I stood next to my mother on the high steps leading up to the Golden Hall.

“If I could choose any place I would want to stay the rest of my life it would be here.” I nodded in agreement with my mother. The wide sweeping view of the Rohan plains could not be matched.

We stood waiting for my father to come home. He was supposed to arrive the day before yesterday. My mother and I had stood out and waited for him in the same place that we stood now, the majority of both days. King Theoden had had servants bring food out to us.

I loved the feel of the wind rushing through my hair and around my dress. I sighed. There was no sign of them from any angle.

“Mama?”

“Yes?”

“I think I am going to go down to the stables to see Thalena and Engel. Please call me up if you spot them.” My mother nodded in agreement.

I walked down the steps to the main stables where my horse was kept. I approached the gate to their stall cheerfully.

“Hello there Thalena.” The horse stood in response to my voice and walked over to place her head over the gate. Engel followed her mother and also placed her head over, trying to push her mother out of the way. She tried to nip at my hand, hoping for some sort of treat.

“I’m sorry. Nothing today. We’re still waiting for Papa to come home. I just decided to stop by.” I took a brush and stepped inside the stall. I worked hard brushing both Tharena and Engel in small circles just as my father had taught me. Engel’s coat was slowly loosing its fuzzy appearance and was turning much lighter. When I finished I put fresh grain in their trough and walked outside to get some fresh air.

As I stood there, I spotted in the distance an eord riding up. Smiling I ran up the steps to my mother who had also spotted them.

“Mama? Can I ride out to them on Stybba? May I mother? It won’t be that far. It’s in broad daylight. Papa’ll be right there if anything goes wrong. Can I please?”

My mother smiled at me. “Go ahead.”

I raced back to the stables, quickly saddleing up Stybba, and mounting. I noticed a look of longing on Engel’s face.

“I’m sorry, girl. You’re not old enough yet. I don’t think I am really old enough yet. Maybe sometime later.”

I raced off through the gates of Edoras, riding through the flowing plains. The flatlands can play funny tricks with distances and Stybba’s short legs didn’t go very fast.

As I approached the large group of horsmen I shouted out to my father. “Papa! Papa! What took you so long?”

The group passed me in a hurry. Under normal circumstances they would have stopped and invited me to join. I looked up at their sad, solemn faces. My joy was suddenly squelched.

“Papa?” I repeated, my voice shakey.

The second in command of my father’s eord rode by. I saw in his hand he held the reins of my father’s horse. The saddle was empty. I stopped, my heart skipped a beat. No. No, this couldn’t happen. Not now. Not ever. I shook my head in disbelief. Nothing could kill my father. Nothing. He was too strong.

I backed my pony up, wanting now to get away from this group of men. I could see them look look back at me, pity written their faces. Just when I had somewhat gotten over Engel’s death. I stopped. I knew that I could not run away forever. I cleared my throat, not wishing to hear the answer to my unasked question, but I had to know for sure.

“Eothain where is my father, Eomund, Marshal of the Mark?” I shouted after them. They rode on. They didn’t stop.

I had to know. They would tell me when we reached the city. I angrily jabbed the sides of Stybba and raced as fast as I could after them.

When we reached the city, I saw the men carrying a stretcher up the hill. I urged Stybba on. When we got close I leapt off Stybba, running the rest of the way myself.

When I saw the man on the stretcher, I felt like I was going to throw up. It was my father, but not the father I had known. His side was soaked in blood, he had a bruise surrounding one eye. He looked somewhat pale, and right then I knew he was going to die. One side of me, dared to hope, but that side was soon quenched. I saw my mother also run up, and the men carrying the stretcher stopped. I knelt alongside my mother at the side of my father. Tears were running down the sides of my cheeks.

Eomund’s eyes opened a fraction, and seeing Mama and me, he smiled slightly.

“Theodwyn,” he croaked. Then he turned to me. “Eowyn?”

“Yes, Papa?”

“I’m sorry…sorry I can’t stay to-to see you grow up.”

“No, no don’t say things like that. It’ll be okay. You’ll live. You’ll live to see me grow up.”

He weakly put a hand up to my lips. I went quiet.

“Daughter, I know you will grow up to be a fine woman. Do not marry around here. Marry- marry a great lord, full of honor and dignity.”

“But Papa. All the great lords I know, I am related-”

He put his hand up again uttering his last words to both me and Mama. “I love you both. Tell Eomer…tell him how much I love him too, and that I am proud of him. Farewell.” His hand dropped to the stretcher. I put my hand to his face. It was cold.

I stood up and ran down the path. I heard my mother shouting after me, but I didn’t turn. I raced up to where Stybba stood waiting. I leapt onto his back and raced out through the gate. There was no father to protect me now. I could never approach Engel’s father without great pain. Now I lost my own father.

I pushed Stybba faster. Tears mingled with the wind. I felt as though I could fly, I was going so fast. I could fly, if the huge weight at the bottom of my stomach would go away. This was all just a dream. I would wake up and find Engel and Papa both there, smiling, loving me.

The more practical side of me knew the truth. He wasn’t coming back. Theodred’s words from Engel’s death came back to me. I would just remember all the great times we had together. I stopped, letting my pony catch his breath. But I wouldn’t just remember. No I would act. I would follow my father’s last request.

If orcs could bring down my father, a great warrior, what was to stop them from attacking everything. I could feel in my bones that a new era was coming, one that was going to be dominantly evil, if none stood in its way.

I dismounted Stybba and climbed on top of the knoll that stood right next to me. I stood on the peak of the hill, the wind rushing past me, through my hair and my dress. I shouted to the wind.

“Bema, I hereby swear, with you as my witness, I will follow my father’s dying request. I will marry a man that is a lord and no less. No common rider for Eowyn, daughter of Eomund, who’s beauty shall surpass the sunrise. But no love shall I give to any other, for it is just a chink in my mail. I will not allow myself to be stabbed again by the sword of another’s death, and only in battle shall I myself dye. Just as my father did. So here I swear.” I spit on both my hands, the only way I knew how to seal an oath, and pressed them into the ground. My fate was sealed.

~January 2, 3004~

I grabbed my sword, yanking out of its sheath. I pointed it straight, placing my hand on its blade for balance. I swirled it around my head, and then went into a series of stabs and blocks.

Now I wasn’t just practicing just to practice. I was taking my anger out on the invisible enemies. It was all my mother’s fault. Instead of helping Eomer and me with our father’s death she goes into mourning seclusion. She was no longer the gentle, loving mother I knew before. Now she was cold, and silent. Her haunted eyes always stayed in one place. For over a year she stayed inside never going out to see the sun. This resulted in her getting sick. Very sick. People expected me to care for her all the time, which I did, but it didn’t help. Now she was so sick, even the great doctors of the land said there was no hope. I whirled around, pretending to cleave an orc head to foot but ended up striking metal. My brother’s sword met mine in a clash.

I pulled back, somewhat embarrassed he had caught me practicing. He didn’t sheath his sword. Instead he posed, ready to spar. I smiled grimly and also got in position.

“I know how you feel,” he said. Oh how I hated that phrase.

“No one knows how I feel.” He struck out. I blocked.

“You feel like Mother has abandoned us to fend for ourselves.” This time I struck out. He blocked and twisted it into an attack. I parried.

“Alright. I admit. That is part of it.”

“You feel like too many people you love have abandoned you by dieing off, and now you don’t want to love again to ensure you can’t get hurt.” I struck fiercely at him. He quickly jumped out of the way, smiling. “I hit the mark didn’t I.”

I just answered him with a stab and strike. He continued parrying and talking.

“I hope you haven’t abandoned love completely. Don’t you believe there could be a man out there perfect for you?”

I swung around trapping his sword against his body. “I highly doubt it,” I snarled in his ear.

He thrashed around, releasing my grasp and forcing me back. He dealt several blows, which I easily blocked, before speaking again.

“You still love me don’t you?” I stepped back and lowered my sword. I hadn’t been expecting that.

“Of course.”

He whipped out and flicked my sword from my grasp. He leveled his sword at my heart and smiled.

“Then I guess you still have a weakness.” He sheathed his sword and fetched mine. “Eowyn, it is impossible not to love anyone. You will destroy yourself trying to. Eowyn, I know how it hurts to loose someone close. You have to remember that you are not the only one that is hurting from the death of Eomund. He was my father too.” His head dropped to his chest and tears welled up in his eyes. “At least you had a chance to see him before he died.”

I suddenly realized how selfish I had been. I had never thought of anyone but myself. After Engel’s death, I had thought only about how much I had been hurting, not about how much her mother and father were grieving. After Papa’s death, the same. I had not thought about Eomer, or Mama, or Uncle Theoden or Theodred. No, only me, myself, and I. I felt childish, stupid, inconsiderate.

I went over to my big brother and held him close. “I’m sorry. I had only been thinking of myself.”

Eomer clung to me as if I was the older and he the younger one. “I forgive you.”

“You know he told me something to tell you that I have completely forgotten about until now.”

Eomer looked at me with hopeful eyes. “Really? What did he say?”

I stepped back and smoothed out my dress. “He told Mama and I to tell you how much he loved you and that he was really proud of you.”

Eomer smiled, tears brimming on his eyes. “Thanks. You don’t know how much I appreciate that.”

I ran up and leapt into his arms, giving him a huge hug, and making him stumble back a little. “He loves you this much.”

***********************************************************************

We both walked into the throne room of the Golden Hall, Eomer carrying me like a little girl. We looked up to see my uncle sitting on the throne staring straight ahead, silent tears running down his cheeks.

I jumped out of Eomer’s arms and ran to him, my brother on my heels. I knelt in front of him, placing my hands on his.

“Uncle? Uncle, what’s wrong?”

His eyes stayed fixated straight ahead. His lips barely moved. “She’s gone. She has left me.”

I immediately knew what he was talking about. I looked at Eomer, tears already spilling down my cheeks. I collapsed to the floor at his feet, sobbing. Life wasn’t fair.

My sobs immediately broke Theoden from his trance. He looked first at Eomer and then at me, as if seeing us for the first time.

“Oh my poor, poor children.”

I suddenly sat up like some crazy animal. I was a poor child! All I wanted right then was to see my mother. I dropped acting mature and grown up. I felt like a toddler whose parent was going away for a while. Who was afraid her parents were not going to come home. But now both my weren’t coming back. They would never come home for me.

All of Eomer’s words that he had just said, his words about loving, fled from me than. I had just been opened up for an attack and the enemy had taken full advantage of it. I wouldn’t make that mistake again.

I sobbed, nothing could stop me. All that I had thought my identity was had been stripped away. I had been Eowyn, daughter of Eomund and Theodwyn, best friends with Engel. Now who was I? A friendless orphan. What kind of title was that?!? I bit my lip hard, bringing my sobs to an abrupt halt. I had to create a title for myself. I had my work cut out for me, but I would do it. I would make my name remembered somehow, someway.

I looked up to see my brother’s graven face staring at me. Seeing that I had regained at least some sense of composure he knelt, holding me close. I looked into his face then and was shocked. His face reminded me too much of my father. My father whom I would never see again.

I pushed myself out of his arms, standing alone. I stood up straight, smoothed out my dress, and bit my lip so hard it started to bleed, trying to keep from crying. I was not going to be some crying infant, always needing to be comforted. I would comfort myself. I didn’t need anyone else.

Eomer stood up beside me. Uncle also stood from his throne and placed an arm around us.

“Eomer, Eowyn. I will take you into my household. Like a father I shall be to you, and you a son and daughter to me. Will you take me?”

I couldn’t hold back. The total weight of Eomer’s words about it being impossible to love anyone, hit me fully. I would love, but it would have boundaries. Only Eomer, Theodred and Uncle Theoden were good enough for my love. No one else. I smiled for the first time in what had seemed like an eternity. My family.

“We accept,” Eomer and I said in unison. We stood in a small circle, embracing each other, holding each other up.

This is what a family is, I thought, and here my love will stay.