(note: this story will make a lot more sense and will be a lot funnier for those who have read the VSDs by Cassie Claire)

(A rustling of chairs and some coughing is heard as everyone takes their seats)

Elrond: *clears throat* Welcome back to Imladris everyone, I hope you all are doing well.

*murmering from the fellowship*

Elrond: *looking around* Is everyone here? Where’s Gandalf? I told him this was important!

Boromir: Give him a moment, for pity’s sake! *everyone looks at Boromir, who coughs* I mean, come on man, he’s got to get rid of that new devilry first.

Legolas: *gives Boromir the evil eye* It’s called a Balrog you nitwit.

Elrond: That’s enough, people. Settle down. We won’t wait for Gandalf, he’ll come when he can. Now, who wants to go first? *looks around* No one? Okay, we’ll start with Aragorn.

Boromir: *bottom lip quivers* It’s because he’s the king, right?

Elrond: *raises eyebrow*

Boromir: Everyone always thinks he’s SOOOOO special just because he’s Isildur’s heir.

Legolas: *stands up* And heir to the throne of Gondor!

Aragorn: *sighs* Legolas, don’t MAKE me say havo dad…

Legolas: *pouts and sits back down*

Elrond: *looks at Boromir, Aragorn, and Legolas* Well Boromir, how about you go first?

Boromir: *sniffs* What do I say?

Elrond: *folds hands in lap* Just tell me how you feel about this whole quest…thing.

Boromir: *takes deep breath* Well…at first I thought it was a bunch of rubbish. I mean, who goes prancing around with hidden kings and halflings and nancing elves, you know?

Legolas: *gives Boromir the evil eye again*

Boromir: *ignores Legolas* But then it got even wierder. I found myself strangely attracted to the two little ones. *points to Merry and Pippin*

Merry and Pippin: *eyes widen*

Elrond: *coughs* Which, I think, is enough on that subject. Anything else you would like to share?

Legolas: *sneers* Go on, Boromir, tell us all about your Hobbit fancying ways.

Elrond: *looking around uncomfortably* Legolas! How about you go next?

Legolas: He’s such a freak. And I thought Aragorn was the only Hobbit fancier.

Aragorn: Hey! Take that back you nancing pointy eared-

Legolas: *stands up again* Why does everyone always pick on me? Why does everyone always call me nancing and pretty boy? Huh, why?

Fellowship: *blinks*

Legolas: *starts to break down* I mean, it’s enough that I got a reputation as being really good looking- which is alot more stressful than it sounds, by the way. But then eveyone teases me about it! I mean, do you think it’s easy to get my hair this perfectly shiny? *points to perfectly shiny hair* Why am I, of all people, the one that everyone makes fun of?

Aragorn: *sniffs* I know just what you mean! It’s the same with me- people just can’t accept the fact that I don’t like to bathe, or groom, or anything. And the one time I did freshen up for my girlfriend people starting snickering about my nicely combed hair. I feel your pain, man!

Aragorn and Legolas: *run into each other’s arms and start bawling*

Boromir: *stares at Aragorn and Legolas and shrinks uncomfortably back into his chair*

Elrond: *looks at watch* Okay, come on people, we don’t have a lot of time left. Now, Frodo, I know this has got to be stressful on you in particular.

Frodo: *looks around wide eyed and clutches the Ring*

Sam: *looking worridly over at Frodo* He’s a bit tired, Mr. Elrond sir. Gandalf’s fall gave him a bit of a shock, and Aragorn’s been actin’ mighty funny around him as well.

Aragorn: *stops weeping for a moment to look at Frodo, who shudders*

Legolas: *backs away from Aragorn with a disgusted look* I knew it! PERVY HOBBIT FANCIER!!!

Elrond: Okay, sorry, bad topic again. *turns to Gimli* Anything you would like to get off your chest?

Gimli: *looks at Frodo, Sam, Aragorn and Legolas from the corner of his eye* They’re all mad, I say. Every last one of ’em. I’m the only one with a solid head in the bunch.

Boromir: *stands up and begins to weep pitifully* He’s so mean! *points at Gimli* He’s always acting like that! Why is he always acting like that?

Sam: *tugs on Elrond’s robe* Mr. Elrond, have you seen Frodo? He was there one minute, and then…

Aragorn: *looks around nervosuly* We have to find him!

Legolas: Why, so you make a move on him, huh?

Elrond: Shut up Legolas. Gimli, help me find Frodo!

Legolas: *crosses arms and slumps in chair*

Merry: Come on Pip, he’s gotta be aound here somewhere!

Merry and Pippin: *begin to topple chairs and crawl on the floor*

Elrond: *sighs and sits back in his chair*

Gimli: *leans over to Elrond* I told you they were all nuts.

*Gandalf suddenly barges in the door and hits his head on the panelling*

Gandalf: *rubs forehead* What’d I miss? *looks around to see upturned chairs, Merry, Pippin and Boromir crawling on the floor, Legolas pouting in his chair, and Aragorn running all over the room with his sword drawn*

Elrond: *stares at floor and shakes head* Nothing important.

Gandalf: *raises eyebrow and looks at Gimli*

Gimli: *shakes head sadly* They’re all-

*Arwen suddenly bursts into the room*

Arwen: DADDY!!!

Elrond: Not now, sweetheart. Daddy’s busy.

Arwen: Okay. *sees Aragorn and flings her arms open* Honey!!!

Aragorn: *obviously preoccupied* Not now, woman. I’m looking for Frodo.

Arwen: *pouts* Why doesn’t anyone love me? Everone likes Frodo better than me!

Gimli: *slowly reaches up and takes Arwen’s hand*

Arwen: *yankes hand away* EWWW!!!! *hits Gimli’s head*

Gimli: *winces at Elrond* I told you all of them were insane… *nods at Arwen* I’m just glad none of ’em are FEMALE……

To be continued…???