Another breath. And another. That’s good. He is still alive, but for how long? I have worked endlessly trying to save my son’s life, and at last there is a change. Not much of a change, but still a change, nevertheless. The foolish boys! They never should have left without my approval. Of course, I never told them that they could get sick. So it’s my fault as well.

Hopefully Elrohir will make a full recovery. It looks like he inherited more of the human blood then his brother. It was the same with Elros and me. I was more immune to human sickness, Elros however got it all the time. Ah, Elros. I have lost so much in my life, I can’t lose my son as well. Never my son. Please, I’d give anything for you to spare him. Elrohir, why you?

I go to fix Elrohir’s blankets that have found their way to the floor, escaping my son’s feverish fury. Elrohir is plagued by hallucinations in his dreams. When he is awake, I see the fear in his eyes. It is like he is with us, but not with us at the same time.

Suddenly the door slams open and Gwesthilol comes barging in. I start to reprimand him for the loud noise, my son is sleeping after all, but I stop in mid-sentence at the look on his face.

“Gwes, breathe. What is going on?” I ask.

“El-Elladan… he… he’s..” he says panting. I hold my hand up telling him to stop. I am never going to get anything out of him like this. Instead I ask him to lead me to Elladan. My heart contracts. Elrohir barely alive, and now something is wrong with my other son! I can’t handle it.

“Gwes, where are we going?” I ask disguising my worry. Elves that know me well would have noticed the slight tremor in my voice, but seeing as how I am fairly good at hiding my feelings, Gwesthilol didn’t notice.

“Archery range,” he says too quickly for my liking. It seems as if he is in a rush. That can’t possibly be good for my eldest son.

My heart drops and my stomach rolls as we approach the range at a run. Elladan is sobbing into Glorfindel’s tunic. I can hear the heart-wrenching sobs above my harsh breathing. I really hope I am not too late. I should’ve known it was grief, when Gwes first came running in. There is always a high possibility that an elf can fade from grief if someone they love dies or is close to it, especially if they have a bond as great as my sons’.

As I reach my life-long friend and my son, I feel tears begin to dampen my eyes. I reach out and sweep Elladan into my arms, where he will know he is loved. He feels so broken and vulnerable. I have no clue what to do. I am considered one of the wisest beings on Arda, the greatest healer alive, and yet I know not what to do to help my son. Some healer! I begin to sing a song from the twins’ childhood, a soft lullaby that always lulled them to sleep and gave them comfort when they were frightened.

“Lay down
Your sweet and weary head
Night is falling
You have come to journey’s end…”
-Annie Lennox

The song isn’t working! I start to panic. I do not know what else to do, but I would do anything to keep him alive and conscious! Please Valar don’t take him from me yet!

“Oh, Elladan. My wonderful Elladan,” I say in despair! He is going to leave, I can see it in his eyes. He is trying to speak. Please let him say something positive, and nothing that would take him away from me.

“I can’t live without him, Ada,” he says. No! He is definitely leaving. Please, Valar, don’t take him yet. Let him see that he is loved more than he knows.
My tears turn into sobs, almost identical to the ones heard coming from Elladan’s form only a few moments ago. Suddenly, the figure in my arms falls limp. The hand I have been holding loosens, his head tilts backwards making his hair fly all over the place. This is my son, this is what grief has brought him to.

Wait! He is breathing! Valar, thank you! There is still hope! My sons can still be saved. I hope now that I will have the willpower to save them. Only I have the power to save them both. I know this, but am weary to the outcome of such pressure. Please Valar, help me. Help them both.

“Glorfindel,” I say finding my voice, “Help me get the twins in the same room. They can draw strength from each other.” He complies immediately. Hold on my sons, there is still hope.