LotR Mis-quotes and Skits

Mis-Quotes
“Ai Ai a taco”- Legolas (in the book it sounded like he was a the taco bell chihuahua)

Uruk-hai Dancers
*Army of Uruk-hai shouting*
“We are the dancing Uruk-Hai, look at our pretty tutus.” (I am hopefully going to try to make a picture to go with this mis-quote. No promises)

“Confused of a Took”- Gandalf (Don’t ask)

“You shall not pass…gas!!!!”- Gandalf (Ditto)

SKITS
Skit 1
Smeagol and Gollum killing Deagol:
Gollum- Give us the precious.
Deagol- No I found it. it’s mine.
Gollum- Give it to us.
Smeagol- Leave him alone. Don’t take the precious.
Gollum- NO!
Smeagol-*in an upbeat mood* Leave him alone, and don’t take the precious.
Gollum-*as he chokes Deagol* NO!!
Smeagol-*as Gollum kills off Deagol* Leave him alone and Don’t take the precious.
Gollum- Too late! He’s dead.
Smeagol- Oh well.
Gollum/Smeagol- Shiny!!!!

Skit 3
Lembas Commercial:
*Legolas talking to camera*
Ahhh… Lembas- one small bite is enough to fill the stomach of a full grown man.
(If you have seen the Cast Commentary on the Extended Edition of FotR then you know what this is.)

Skit 4
Smeagol’s Questions
Sam- Smeagol go and look for turnips and carrots, and taters, I’d give a lot for a half dozen taters…
Smeagol- Smeagol won’t go, oh no precious, not this time… he’s frightened, and he’s very tired, and this hobbit’s not nice, not nice at all. Smeagol won’t grub for roots and carrotses and – taters. What’s taters, precious, eh what’s taters?
Sam- Po-Ta-Toes!
Smeagol- Oh *pause*… *in Samwise’s tone* what’s Po-Ta-Toes, precious?
Sam- *deep sigh of my god what an idiot*

Skit 5
The Paths of the Dead
The Paths of the Dead:
Aragorn- Legolas what do you see?
Legolas- *looks into cave* I see dead people!
Arod- neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh! *freaks out*
Gimli- That’s it, I’m officially NOT going in there!(this is the one my friend made up we were just really bored)