(Note: If y’all read this already, it’s beacuse the chapters freaked out on me…again 🙂

“So, I can’t believe this is happening to us,” Boromir had an unbelieving look in his eyes. They were parked right where they had been for the last hour. The Doors of Durin refused to open and Gimli couldn’t remember the password that Balin had emailed to him. Everyone was totally angry and bored and the hobbits were getting twitchy.
“While Gandalf tries to figure out the password, can’t we play a game?” begged Frodo. Eomer glared at him.
“Yeah, everyone play the Quiet Game. Whoever speaks or moves first gets beat up.”
“Eomer, don’t be so surly,” sighed Arwen. “You are in charge of indoor recreation.”
“Yeah, well I handed over that job to the shrimps,” grumbled Eomer, squirming around to get comfortable on the twisted mass of blankets, pillows and cushions on the couch.
“Hey!” cried Sam, throwing a pillow at Eomer. The sulking Rohirrim caught it and tucked it under his head.
“That’s mine!” bellowed Eowyn, trying to snatch it from Eomer.
“I don’t care!” Eomer yelled back. Arwen groaned and stuck her head out the window.
“Aragorn,” she called toward the direction of the Doors where Aragorn and Gandalf were trying to batter down the stubborn doors. “Everyone’s getting cranky here. How much longer?”
“No idea,” panted Aragorn, inserting an iron bar between the cracks of the Doors and tried to pry them open. “Tell them to behave themselves or else.” He glared at Legolas who was spitting huge mouthfuls of sunflower seeds at Gandalf.
“Come on, you stupid computer!” wailed Gimli, banging on the keyboard of Eowyn’s laptop. He was trying to access his email to get the password from Balin.
“We don’t get internet reception in these darn hills,” grumbled Boromir. “I’ve already tried.”
“Doesn’t work with cell phones either,” pouted Faramir, trying to access a text message. Gimli scowled and snarled for a few minutes, then stomped to the RV roof to see if he could get reception.
“Hey Gandalf,” Eomer stuck his head out the window. He was trying to lighten the angry mood. “What was your favorite movie?”
“Eomer, this really isn’t the time,” scowled Aragorn. Gandalf rolled his eyes, but he knew if he did not answer Eomer, the persistent Rohirrim would never give up. “Uh,” he thought for a moment. “Mulan.” As soon as he said this, the Doors creaked opened. A stunned silence filled the RV. Eomer looked extremely proud of himself.
“No way,” Aragorn muttered at last.
“Who’s good?” crowed Eomer, swaggering up and down the RV.
“Whatever,” scowled Gandalf. “Everyone shut up and let’s go.” He stomped back into the RV and slammed the door. Aragorn revved the engine for an unnecessarily long time and then screeched through the Doors of Durin and into the blackness of Moria.
“Ugh, it’s dark in here,” whined Legolas. Aragorn flipped on the high beams and was just about to explode down the long, dark tunnel, when he suddenly thought of something.
“Hey Gandalf?” he asked.
“What?” snapped the wizard, still angry about Eomer figuring out the password. “How, uh, which way do we go?” Aragorn asked, swerving around a dwarf skeleton. Gandalf whipped out a stack of maps and began riffling through them. “Gondor,” he muttered to himself. “Mirkwood, Shire, Isenguard…”
“Why in Middle Earth do you have a map to there?” cried Denethor.
“Because,” grunted Gandalf.
“Anytime now,” sighed Aragorn, drumming his fingers impatiently on the steering wheel.
“I’d hurry if I had more light,” Gandalf shot back. Muttering angrily, he fumbled around the RV floor, though wads of blankets, soda cans, permanent markers (Faramir’s fault), random trash and various pairs of shoes until he found his staff. “I though Eowyn was supposed to keep this RV clean,” commented Eomer snidely, who had been helping Gandalf find his staff.
“That’s right!” bellowed Eowyn. “Hut, hut everyone! This RV is going to be spotless!”
“No,” pouted Legolas.
“Legolas,” warned Arwen, glaring at him. “Now.”
There was a collective sigh as everyone grumbled and hauled themselves to their feet. Legolas began halfheartedly sweeping the masses of sunflower seeds that had pilled up all over the RV. Eomer and Gimli started to pick up pillows, but then this turned into a pillow fight and that job was quickly handed over to the hobbits. Gandalf muttered angrily as he waded through tons of maps, until he finally located the Moria one. It was wrinkled and dirty, because Boromir had slid on it on one of his many trips back and forth the RV. Gandalf squinted to see the rumpled map.
“It’s so dark in here,” he scowled. With a ‘poof’ his staff lit up with a brilliant flash. There was a yell of surprise and Aragorn swerved.
“Gandalf!” he yelled. “Do not do that again!” The wizard glared at him and continued to read the map. “O.K,” he finally said. “Make a right at the next archway.” Aragorn did so with a rapid swerve that sent everyone flying. “Oh, wait,” Gandalf consulted the map again. “Wrong way. I was reading this upside down.” Aragorn gave a dramatic sigh and exploded backwards to the archway.
“You make a left,” said Gandalf. “Then a sharp right.”
“Thanks,”” muttered Aragorn, screeching through the halls of Moria.
“Continue for…” Gandalf paused for a long time. “Three miles, I think.”
“You think?!!” Eomer, who did not like dark, enclosed spaces, was nervous.
“Chill, Eomer,” sighed Boromir, balling up the blankets and squishing them into a corner. Faramir flopped down on the messily arranged couch and began drawing yet another design on his arm.
“Faramir, you have a whole sleeve of drawings now!” exclaimed Legolas, poking one experimentally. Faramir jerked his arm away with an injured air and began drawing a snake that wrapped around his wrist.
“I hope that washes off,” scowled Denethor.
“I think it does.” Faramir looked worried.
“Three miles,” bellowed Aragorn. “Now what.” Gandalf hunted frantically for his map which he had dropped. “Hang on…left again, though the arch and into that huge hall-thingie.”
“Are we almost there?” grumbled Pippin. “This place holds bad memories for me.”
“It holds bad memories for you?!!” Gandalf glared at him.
“We’re not going to make it though Moria today,” said Aragorn, slowing down to avoid a pile of skeletons. “We have to spend the night here.” There was a bellow of rebellion, as no one wanted to spend the night in the dark of Moria. “Look,” snapped Aragorn. “I’m not driving all night, and I don’t trust Eomer to drive. And none of you have adequate licenses.”
“I have my license!” yelled Boromir.
“I repeat, none of you have adequate licenses.” Boromir looked huffy.
“I hope we can spend one restful night here,” sighed Arwen. “i haven’t relaxed at all during this trip.”
What do you think? Yup, Arwen just jinxed everyone. Stay tuned for the Fellowship’s newest disaster!!!

~~~All right, because the bloomin’ chapter 6 wouldn’t add, I’ve continued the story from here:~~~

Aragorn just grunted and parked next to a large pillar.
“I’m starving!” wailed Eomer.
“Yeah, me too!” exclaimed Boromir, eating the last of Faramir’s rations. “Those little ration things don’t hold up very long.” Everyone glared at Denethor who looked miffed.
“If I set up the barbeque, will you cook?” Aragorn asked Gandalf hopefully.
“I guess,” grumbled Gandalf.
“Everyone clean out the RV NOW!!!” bellowed Eowyn. There was immediate complaining and a fight broke out. Gandalf whacked several heads to restore order and sent everyone in to clean while he, Aragorn and Arwen cooked. Boromir wanted to do cleaning the easy way and just throw everything away, regardless. Eowyn boomed that that was a “horrible idea” and sent Boromir to fold all the blankets.
Eventually they all finished, except for Legolas who was forced to stay in the RV until every single sunflower seed was gone.
“I’m bored,” grumbled Eomer and Boromir simultaneously.
“Not again,” sighed Gandalf, digging around in the ice chests.
“Can I light the stove?” Denethor asked Aragorn, eyeing the huge box of matches.
“No,” replied Aragorn disagreeably. “Go watch the runts.” He gestured toward the hobbits who were trying to slide down the windshield of the RV. Denethor stomped off in a huff. Meanwhile, Boromir was eyeing the long stretch of empty floor in the great hall-thingy.
“Hey Eomer, I’ll race you.” Eomer looked up from where he was trying to tie Gimli to a pillar.
“But I’m so much better than you; it won’t seem to be a real challenge.”
“Oh yeah?!” roared Boromir, ripping off his jacket in what he considered to be a manly way and jumped into starting position. Legolas stuck his head outside of the RV window excitedly. (The RV door had been locked to prevent him from getting out and not picking up all his sunflower seeds).
“Ready?” he shouted.
“Whenever that sissy Gondorian is!” Eomer roared back.
“Hey, don’t talk about my son that way!” hollered Denethor, from where he was pulling a stuck Sam out from under the RV. Gandalf snickered.
“Get set?” squealed Legolas. Eomer made a false start.
“Eomer!!” roared Boromir.
“Shush,” snapped Eomer, slouching back to start.
“GO!!!” screamed Legolas, waving his arms. Eomer and Boromir bolted off, Boromir screaming and waving his arms. Eomer was letting out a loud and steady bellow and was also waving his arms.
“Good grief,” muttered Aragorn, tearing a package open with his teeth. “I hope we don’t run in anyone we know.”
“Come on Eomer!!” roared Faramir.
“Let’s go Boromir!” howled Eowyn. Everyone peered down the great hall-thingy (Gandalf had lit it with his Super-Mega-Light light bulb).
“Let’s go watch them!” shouted Faramir. Everyone ran off, leaving Legolas to hammer frantically at the locked RV door. Gandalf and Aragon whistled the fellowship theme music as they raced down the long hall. Far ahead, Eomer and Boromir were still screeching and waving their arms. Soon, they turned around and came panting back.
“I win!” squawked Eomer, stumbling past Gandalf.
“Did not,” argued Boromir, red-faced. Eomer opened his mouth to fight, and then suddenly his face froze.
“Eomer, what…” Gandalf turned around. And gasped. Hurtling toward them at an amazing speed was the RV.
“OHMYGOSH!!!!” howled Arwen. Eowyn threw her head back and screamed for a full minute. The hobbits ran around in circles, yelling and tripping everyone.
“Run!” shouted Gandalf. Just then, a scream higher pitched than anyone else rang above the noise.
“Legolas!” gasped Aragorn. The all too familiar blonde head poked out of the RV window.
“Save me!!!!” screamed Legolas, hysterical. “I’m dying!” Eomer and Boromir silently hi-fived each other.
“Stop it!” screeched Arwen, hysterical also.
“I can’t,” Aragorn screeched back. “I’ll get run over!” The RV hurtled closer and closer. Suddenly, a small, dark shadow seemed to fall from the huge roof of the great hall-thingy and landed on the RV roof.
“Is that Gollum?” asked Eomer, interested. Aragorn peered closer.
“Oh. My. Gosh.” He gasped. “It’s an orc!”
“This is not good!” choked Gandalf. As if to crush the remaining good-feelings that were left, what seemed to be 600 more orcs also landed on the roof. Legolas’ screams died off to a whimper, then renewed in a full-blown banshee shriek.
“Stand back, humans!’ bellowed one of the orcs who was sitting on the windshield. “This RV is being hijacked. Step on it, boys!” The orcs, who had broken their way into the RV, apparently had removed Legolas from the driver’s seat because the RV suddenly shot ahead with a renewed strength.
“Follow it!!” howled Aragorn.
“Where are they going?” gasped Arwen.
“To the bridge of Khaza-doom!” boomed Gandalf. “Run!” The hobbits did their best to follow, tripping and falling the whole way.
“This would be funny if it wasn’t Legolas’ life at stake,” panted Eowyn.
“This is funny,” said Eomer, doubling over with laughter.
“Take the elevator!” shouted Gandalf. He pointed to an elevator set in the wall. Everyone clamored to get inside. The hobbits had to be stacked on top of each other for room.
“I can’t get my leg in!” howled Boromir.
“My arm!’ screeched Faramir, extracting his arm from the closing doors.
“Hurry, or we’ll be too late!” yelled Gandalf, which was totally unnecessary because they were all crammed into the tiny elevator.
“We can’t afford to lose the RV, so everyone run fast!” thundered Denethor, also unnecessarily. With this in mind, the gang spilled out of the elevator doors and continued in the chase to save the RV. Oh, and Legolas.

See how the Fellowship is going to get out of this newest scrape soon!!