(In the throneroom)

Theoden: Who am I, Gamling?

Gamling: What do you mean? You’re Bernard Hill!

Theoden: Gamling, read the script.

Gamling: (Gamling looks at script) You are our king, sire.

Theoden: And do you trust your King?

Gamling: No, not really.

Theoden: GAMLING, look at the script and memorize it!

Gamling: (looks at script again, while helping Theoden with his armor) Your men, my lord, will follow you to whatever end.

Theoden: To whatever end.

Gamling: Is there an echo in here?

Theoden: I’m telling the story, so shut UP!!

Gaming: (silence)

Theoden: Where is the horse and rider?

Gamling: I dunno.

Theoden: Where is the horn that was blowing?

Gamling: Why don’t you blow it?

Theoden: (Trying to keep his temper under control) They have passed like rain on the mountainside. Like wind in the meadows…

Gamling: (excitedly) I love meadows and mountainsides!! Why did we just the Uruk-Hai army?

Theoden: SHUT UP!!! One more incorrect remark that is not in the script and I will KILL you!!

Gamling: Okay

Theoden: The days have gone down in the west, behind the hills into shadow. How did it come to this?

Gamling: I dunno, but that’s entirely your fault.

Theoden: That’s it! DIIIIIEEEEE!!! (Pulls out sword and starts chasing Gamling)

Gamling: (Thinking) Hama, why did you die? (Continues running with Theoden close behind)

Print Friendly, PDF & Email