Disclaimer: Um… these characters are definitely not mine… Again, this is not a weight loss program or a therapedic program for various psychological problems. As far as we know. *shifty eyes*.

Smeagol is so happy that master is nice to him so he starts to sing a little song. Gollum wants to puke but can’t seem to shut Smeagol up…

S: The real me is fat little hobbit on the riverbank fishin’ with my bro
Wish I could love the world…
G:…even though we hateses it!
S: The real me is…
G:…without us, we’s isss really better off with me around
S: But lately I’ve been jaded.
G: Life just got so tricksey!

S: I’m still thinking about it… Almost forgot what it was like…
G: This is not right…

S: GO AWAY!
Cause with you
I can be Smeagol again
I can say something
unpossessed…
I know you’ll love me no matter what the stupid fat hobbit says!

With nothing but a loincloth on…
I’ve seriously feel beautiful
Precious, I’m so beautiful now…
Now that I’m with you! With you!
With you!
With you-hoo!
G: Oh Precious, pleaseses…
S:You speak and I sing a song,
G: One that makeses us wants to toss our cookies…
S: It’s just a little secret we keep from the stupid one… yeah…
because he’s fat!
(we can’t have cookiesss lahv!)
You love me naturally
Not being stupid and fat and ugly…
It used to be hard to breathe…
G: …without our precious we’re nothing!
S: I’m not thinking about it… I remember what it was like…
G: hisssssss!
S: GO AWAY!
G: what?
S: GO AWAY AND NEVER COME BACK!
to know how to talk right
cause…
when I’m with you,
I am Smeagol again
I can say anythaaang
without being a freak…
I know you’ll love me no matter what the faaaaat one says!

With nothing but a loincloth on…
I’ve seriously feel beautiful
Bey-beh I’m so beautiful now…
Now that I’m with you! With you!

You can take me
To Mordor
You saved me,
Like nobody else!
Now I can be myself…
WITH YOU!

I can…
WAIT! Where is my other voice? I told him to go away, and HE DID! Gollum Gollum Gollum… SMEAGOLS FREE!!! 🙂