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Dream~Giver
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Post Any Members of the Military?
on: May 04, 2008 06:54
Before I start this, let me spell out a few things:

This thread was made for:
-People from military families
-People who are or used to be in the military and wish to share their experiences.
-People who are interested in the military and wish to know more
-People with family members, husbands, boyfriends, etc. who are currently stationed overseas, and wish to find some support.

You may NOT use this thread for:
-Recruiting
-Bashing the military and/or any conflicts going on in the world today. If you have any thoughts against the military or oppose the current conflicts and such, please keep those thoughts to yourself.

I've recieved permission from one of the moderators to post this; try not to get this out of hand.

Anyways, on to the thread. Yes, I'm from a military family. My dad has served in the Air Force for 23 years--he retired in 2003. I have an uncle in the Navy who's served in Iraq.
I also have a lot of friends who are and plan on joining the military--two of them are in the Army, and one of them will be joining the Navy.
Even my boyfriend is in the military--he's a member of the Marine Corps. He's getting deployed in June. He was originally going to get sent to Iraq, but that has changed (and thank goodness for that too. ). Now, he's going to Djibouti Africa--I won't get to see him until next year, and I'm really worried of what may happen. It's scary, you know? However, I'll stand by him and support him all the way. :heart:

Anyone else? Come on, I know you're out there.

[Edited on 4/5/2008 by Dream~Giver]
awelyn418
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 04, 2008 07:29
My son was in the Army and was going to make a career out of it. He said the Army actually saved his life. He was going down the wrong path with drugs and the wrong crowd. The Army gave me my son back. But due to a medical condition he had to leave the Army. It was so awful for him. As his mom I have to confess I was glad he did not go to Iraq but I still feel his pain. He is going to college now and wants to be a college professor. The Army is paying for him to go to college and also to fulfill a dream of his to teach. I have had uncles that were in the Navy and nephews in the Marines and Navy. I have had relatives in the Army as far back as the civil war. I salute the brave men and women who sacrifice so much for us and their families.
God bless them.
scots56
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 04, 2008 08:06
I'm a Navy mom. My son has been in six years in Naval intelligence. He's currently studying to be a Korean linguist. The Navy has afforded him such opportunities. He's lived in London, traveled to Paris, France, the Canary Islands, Budapest, Hungry, and Naples, Italy to name just a few. And it has been wonderfully good for him. He went into the Navy two weeks after he graduated from high school and his 18th birthday, and it has helped him grow into a wonderful man of whom I am inordinately proud of.

We've been lucky that he's not been in Iraq although my nephew is serving in his second tour. He lost the small bone in his leg (I don't remember what that bone is called) due to the 8th IED attack on his convey. He was given the choice of getting out, staying in and being stateside, or going back with his unit. He chose door number 3. He feels very strongly about what he is doing and his buddies mean the world to him. He's another that the military has changed into an awesome young man.

PBS did an awesome miniseries on life on a carrier ship. I missed it, but my sister said it was awesome.

Youtube also has a video that Navy guys did to keep themselves amused. It's highly amusing. Look at it here

[Edited on 4/5/2008 by scots56]
RodwenofRohan
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 05, 2008 07:26
I'm a navy brat... but my dad's been out since 1993. He served on a carrier during Operation Desert Storm in the first Gulf War. I highly support all who are in our armed forces. I am saddened every time I hear people talk down about those who serve- and not just the United States' military. All soldiers are heros, IMHO
Elfalas
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 05, 2008 09:11
I know people in the military. There's a senior at my high school this year who won't get to walk the stage with his class because he's being deployed. I have friends who have family members in Iraq, and the guy my dad's currently training to take his job is in the Army as well.

I completely agree with you Rodwen, it sucks when people constantly talk down. In my opinion, the soldiers are more curageous than any of those who talk like that. I pray for the soldiers every night and their families.
Dream~Giver
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 05, 2008 10:56
Anyone had to travel a lot because of the military? My dad's been to Okinawa and South Korea a few times (he met my mom there. ^.^)--I've actually lived in South Korea for about two years. I've also traveled to basically every state in the Western part of the U.S, down to Florida, and finally, up here to Pennsylvania

I know people in the military. There's a senior at my high school this year who won't get to walk the stage with his class because he's being deployed.


Same here, one my best friends will be going to basic training two weeks before graduation; joining the Army.

I completely agree with you Rodwen, it sucks when people constantly talk down. In my opinion, the soldiers are more courageous than any of those who talk like that.


I'm with you on this as well. A lot of people don't realize that it's the men and women who put themselves on the front that gives those people the right to say such things. I don't think they'll ever understand that unless it's suddenly taken away from them.

Another pet peeve of mine is how people don't think about what they say. Like I said in my original post, my boyfriend is getting deployed in June. Here are some of my "favorite" quotes from people at school:

-Wow, he's getting deployed? Aren't you afraid he'll get killed?
Yes, of course I am; I'm terrified--it's a thought that lingers in the back of my mind, and now, it's been brought back up to the front. Thanks a lot; that's almost like asking a cancer patient if they're afraid of dying.

-I know exactly what you're going through--my dad had to go on a business trip for 2 weeks, so don't worry.
This really irritates me. My boyfriend is being trained to kill. I won't be able to communicate with him much, if at all. Even though he won't be sent to a war-zone, it says a lot about the other men and women who currently are stationed in Iraq or Afghanistan--people did not shoot at said person's father or try to blow him up.

And of course, my personal favorite:
Well, he signed up for it, so therefore, it's own fault--and I think you're stupid for holding on to him like that.
Yes, he signed up. And everyday, he, along with other men and women protects the right for people to say ignorant comments like that; he signed up to protect his country (and help with college). A lot of family friends kept signing back up because they love what they do and there's a job that needs to be done. And as for holding on to him--I can't help who I fall in love with--he's someone that I care deeply for, and I will continue to support him all the way. I have and always will support the brave men and women serving our country.

Speaking of deployment, can anyone give me advice on this? Like, how to cope with it, support him even though he'll be far away, and to keep the relationship strong?

[Edited on 5/5/2008 by Dream~Giver]
BerethEdhellen
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 05, 2008 11:22
Besides my great grandaddy who fought in the civil war (we have letters from him to great granny about being close to where Robt. E. Lee and his troops were billeted), I've had cousins in both the WWI and WWII. Both my brothers were in the Air Force during the Viet Nam war, a nephew in the Navy during the first Iraq offensive and a son-in-law in the Marines currently.

Dream~Giver...the best advice I can give you comes from my daughter, whose hubby is Marine based. The most important thing is to find a group of women with husbands/boyfriends in the military and deployed. It's the fellow support that counts...in all ways. The long lonely days/nights, the aches and fears, the potential for injured or even slain loved ones, and just the day to day 'getting by'. Another thing to keep in mind is that, depending on where they're based, many of our troops have access to the internet and email/IM/and my space-type sites are available to them. If they don't, the most important thing to them is to hear from you...often. Snail mail from home reminding them what they're fighting for is so welcome to them. You may not hear often from them but they will receive your letters so don't forget to mail them even if they're not answered as often as you'd like.

And yes, supporting our troops is important. It's not their fault they are where they are but they're doing their job, with bravery and courage. Never blame them for doing what they signed up to do.
Life is good! Live it to the fullest. Love well those near and dear. "You cannot step into the same river twice, for the waters are ever flowing on ....." Heraclitus I Aear cân ven na mar
awelyn418
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 05, 2008 03:48
Dream ~Giver have you ever watched Army Wives? You need to talk to a Army or Navy wife. would suggest you get online and find a support group for wives and girlfriends. I am sure there have to be some. They would be able to give you some good advice as I have no idea.
BelleBayard
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 05, 2008 03:55
I'm retired Navy (1991) and work for the Veterans Administration as a nurse. I pretty much spent most of my time in the States, but had 2 tours in Hawaii and one in Bermuda. My last tour was on a floating drydock (WW II vintage) in Virginia during Desert Storm. I had 2 kids while on active duty and felt for the moms who had to go into battle, leaving dad with the little ones.

I agree with Bereth's suggestion, Dream~Giver. Support groups really do help. And lots of letters and emails (if allowed) will make him feel better. It means so much to folks to know all the little "boring" details of what's going on back home. Pictures and tapes are great, too.

I am truly thankful that the vets coming back today are treated better than those from the Vietnam Era. It left a lot of scars on them you can't see. A lot of people today are very ignorant about the military and what it means - you are so right that they can say what they do because of the men and women who fought for those rights.

As the Marines say (a branch of the Navy), "Semper Fi!" Once a Marine, always a Marine. Most vets are proud of their service to the country, as they should be rightfully, and those on active duty deserve our support, whether or not we agree with the conflict.
PrincessPana
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 06, 2008 10:40
No military connections here but i just wanted to say kudos on the new thread.

Why would anyone want to bash the Military?? They stand in the Front line so that I don't have to . . . the very least I can do is Stand behind them. They do a most difficult job in usually very difficult circumstances, none of which are ever made by them.

btw, I'm not necessarily bashing politicians or anyone else here either but if anyone deserves some wrath sometime I do think that is the direction where it could be usefully aimed.

Anyway, Just thought I'd show support and say . . . :love:

[Edited on 11/5/2008 by PrincessPana]
Dream~Giver
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 07, 2008 12:10
btw, I'm not necessarily bashing politicians or anyone else here either but if anyone deserves some wrath sometime I do think that is the direction where it could be usefully aimed.
[Edited on 6/5/2008 by PrincessPana]


No offense taken. There is a difference between supporting your troops and bad government decisions. I will not mention anything specific--I'll just leave it at that.
Tholinnas3
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 07, 2008 02:09

Speaking of deployment, can anyone give me advice on this? Like, how to cope with it, support him even though he'll be far away, and to keep the relationship strong?


I trained for about 4 years in an officer training program with the Marine Corps. It was my dream job but had a medical problem that kept me out towards the end of my training. When at boot camp I learned quite well what you look forward to and what you really don't want to hear.

First, write him a lot. Mail call may be limited but the military is really good about getting your letters there. He will cherish those moments reading your notes more than food, sleep or comfort. I can't stress this enough. Write him every day and ask if others in his platoon would appreciate your letters as well. Write them too. Short hand written notes are fine if you can't think of much to say.

Second, try not to complain to him about anything at all. Try not to lean on him when you have a bad day or tell him constantly that you wish he was home. Tell him you miss him and you love him and you are proud of him. Tell him the little things you do everyday that may seem boring and mundane or the little things that made you smile. They will bring him home in his mind and make him remember that there is more than just war and death. They will make him happy. Remember that for you a bad day is when you are late to class and the teacher embarrasses you, for him a bad day is when he sees children being killed and his friends are blown up trying to stop it.

Listen to him when he talks to you on the phone, if you get to talk to him. If he is quiet and doesn't want to talk about what is going on don't push it. Talk about things back home.

I have number of friends that have served and I wish I could have gone with them. A little bit of home can make all the difference.

This post is getting long so I will just say that there is an amazing photo journalist that is retired military that has spent more time embedded with troops in Iraq than anyone else. He really knows what he is talking about. He mostly discusses the individual military personnel he deals with and the jobs they are doing. His posts are at http://michaelyon-online.com/

His book is also quite good.
Dream~Giver
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 11, 2008 02:31
I've already spent a great deal crying about it. I really do feel like I'm being selfish at times--he's got a job to do, and I know that seeing me cry just kills him. I don't want to be that type of person to him; I want to support him all the way.

When he was at basic training, I wrote to him everyday. When he was at MOS, I told him of the everyday events that have happened here. Trust me, I'm not going to let this go--I really do care about him. I've already found a few support groups online, like some of you suggested, to help with this.

It's just really hard sometimes, and so frustrating. There are so many things he'll be missing over here...he's already missed the Senior Ball last night because he was called away for a few weeks. He'll be leaving for 5 months just two days after graduate before his deployment. Please don't think I'm being whiny. Knowing that he'll be on the other side of the world for such a long time; not being able to talk to him directly, to touch and to hold him...just simple things like that is what kills me. And once again, I feel like I'm being selfish, because I know he feels the same way...

I'm trying, I really am. And I assure you that I'm not going to let this go.

[Edited on 12/5/2008 by Dream~Giver]
Ven
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 11, 2008 06:34
Just thought I'd stop by to thank all the Tolkienite men and women in the service.
Dream~Giver
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 17, 2008 01:34
I should say my thanks as well. :heart:
PrincessPana
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: May 25, 2008 03:00
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"War must be, while we defend our lives against a destroyer who would devour all; but I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend . . . . "
Faramir ~ Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien.
Dream~Giver
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: June 16, 2008 05:33
Well, my boyfriend just left this morning. He'll be heading down to Camp Lejeune tomorrow where he'll complete his 5-10 week training. He may be able to come home for the Fourth of July weekend in between.

After that's finished, he'll be able to come home for a few weeks, then he's heading to Djibouti for 3-6 months. Apparently, it's 400 days total starting today--if that's the case, he should be home by mid-July next year.

I've had to say goodbye to him many times and it never gets easier. Last night was no exception. But, I've got something even more to look forward to when he comes home. I'm not going to give all the details away, but I'll say this: we plan on having a future together. I'm not going to let this go.
BelleBayard
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: June 16, 2008 06:14
All my prayers for you and him, Dream~Giver. It's never easy to see someone you love going into potential danger. Let him know that we are behind him and his comrades-in-arms 100%. Princess Pana's quote seems perfect. We don't want war, but we also understand sometimes we cannot help it and we MUST support those who put themselves in harm's way. Big hugs, hon, and all the best to you two for the future.
awelyn418
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: June 16, 2008 07:06
Dream~Giver I am so sorry and I know it hurts. I remember my husband being drafted in 1969. We had been married one year. It was one of the hardest thing for me to watch him get on that bus and leave me. So when I say I know how you feel I really do know how you feel. Belle and PrincessPana are giving you such support and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Keep your chin up and the blessings for your future. :hug:
PrincessPana
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: July 04, 2008 11:48
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War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things; the decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. A man who has nothing for which he is willing to fight; nothing he cares about more than his own personal safety; is a miserable creature who has no chance of being free, unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself.
John Stuart Mill

Happy 4th July Holiday ~ Thank You for Maintaining my Independence !!! :love:

[Edited on 16/7/2008 by PrincessPana]
PrincessPana
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: September 10, 2008 11:28
I Know I'm Double Posting here but I think this is Hugely Important so I'm asking you to forgive me in advance . . .

September 10th 2001

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September 11th 2001

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Tommorrow Our Duty is to Remember !!!!!!!!!
Dream~Giver
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Post RE: Any Members of the Military?
on: September 16, 2008 05:24
I'm very sure everyone will forgive you for your double post Pana, considering how it is very important to remember.

Well, my boyfriend just left for Djibouti yesterday. I already have a whole stack of letters ready to send to him. ^_^ However, from the looks of it, it's probably going to be 7-9 months instead of 3-6. God bless him and the others. I'll be praying for his safe return. :heart:
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