By Eowyn_HorseJoy
Parody of "The Old Gumbie Cat" by from Cats

Aragorn:
I have a sheildmaiden in mind
She’s Eowyn, daughter of Eomund
Her horse is of the thoroughbred kind
With a brown coat and mane and tail
All day she fights with Uruk-Hai
Or fights with orcs or wild men
She fights and fights and fights and fights and that’s what makes a sheildmaiden
That’s what makes a sheildmaiden

Female chorus:
But when the day’s hustle and bustle is done
Then the sheildmaiden’s work is finally done
And when all her family’s in bed and asleep
She goes out to the hillside, all alone to weep
She takes a deep breath and screams into the night:
Eowyn: “Why does nobody care that nothing’s going right?”
Female chorus:
Life’s so hard for her,
Always gaurding her lord,
Her uncle who really should have loved her more

Merry:
I have a sheildmaiden in mind
Her name is Eowyn or Dernhelm
Her eyes were fell as they locked with mine
And her hair streams forth from her abandoned helm

All day she fights with the Witch-King
On the battlefields of Pelennor
She fights and fights and fights and fights and that’s what makes a sheildmaiden
That’s what makes a sheildmaiden

Female chorus:
But when the day’s hustle and bustle is done
Then the sheildmaiden’s work is finally done
And now that her skills have been put to the test,
In the Houses of Healing
She can finally rest
She soon will be healed by the hands of the King
Before the last battle in the War of the Ring
Then after few days of sleep and a feast
She can stroll in the garden and look to the East

Faramir:
I have a sheildmaiden in mind
She’s Eowyn, daughter of Eomund
She is the fairest in my mind
Of all maidens under the sun

All day she fought her enimies
Alive or undead, she smote them all
She fought and fought and fought and fought and that’s what makes a sheildmaiden
That’s what makes a sheildmaiden

Female chorus:
But when the day’s hustle and bustle is done
Then the sheildmaiden’s work is finally done
And now we’re at the end of this terrible war
And she chooses to be
A sheildmaiden no more
She turns now from war
To love and to peace
And from her sadness she is finally released
And now that she is a sheildmaiden no more
She is the new princess of Gondor

All: For she’s a jolly good fellow

Eowyn: Thank you, my dears!

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