*Gollum hops along slowly behind the Fellowship, and starts to sing*

Can I get your ring to try on?
Just a small finger to bite on?
What a night to chase some dwarfs on,
I won’t let them make that ring gone!
Take a look, it’s full of power, for me!
I’ll get it while they take a shower…
Sauron, I will find them one day,
I will get the ring back to play,
I will make those midget-Elves pay,
That’s the evil Sauron’s way!
Pick it up, it’s way too strong for you,
Let me have my precious on…

Follow those hobbits to Mordor!
They will be killed soon, before
They reach the darkest tower,
Stupid hobbits, destroying the power.
Fo…llow…that…ring…

Rebel and a stupid hobbit,
Pretty soon Frodo will drop it,
And guess who’ll be there to grab it,
Cos one day he knows he’ll have it,
Once again in his hands, YES YES!
The last of those precious bands…

Follow those hobbits to Mordor!
Don’t fear, they’ll never reach the door,
My precious ring will never
Be thrown away forever,
Gollum knows that he would die before he lets it,
Drop away where he can’t have it,
Follow, those hobbits to Mordor!
I know they’ll never reach the door!

*guitar solo, as Gollum hops away into the sunset, cackling*