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rhodilwen
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on: February 10, 2015 09:44
Howdy, Lily! Welcome to the gang! (Love the sig by the way! we just watched that movie the other day!)

@Blue- seeing it on paper does help alot. I see (or other people see) mistakes that way. Usually it's the little things, like a missing comma or something.

For this prompt I might have to channel my inner Carrie Underwood! lol!! This sounds fun. I might have to take some time out to do this one!
The men of the east may spell the stars/ and times and triumphs mark/ But the men signed with the cross of Christ/ go gaily in the dark- G.K. Chesterton ~Member of the Realm of Ulmo~ http://clairembanschbach.wordpress.com/
Lily Lindsey-Aubery
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on: February 10, 2015 11:02
Thank you, Blue! lol yes, all good things. Thanks for the editing advice; it will be really helpful!

@rhodilwen, I really like that movie! It's so funny. XD
~Lilylol Incredibly handsome criminal genius and master of all villainy!
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 10, 2015 06:46
You're welcome, Lily! That's what we're here for!
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: February 11, 2015 12:45
So does anybody have any thoughts on the prompt?
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 11, 2015 03:18
Sorry Maxie! Nothing on this one. It sounds interesting though. First person is kind of challenging for me, & I've never even wanted to do anything like that. Although it might help me interact with my antagonists better...
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
BelleBayard
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on: February 12, 2015 06:42
I'll chime in, though I would never do something like that.

I saw the spotless red sports car and grimaced. That car meant more to him than anything else... his family, me, grades, and I suspected even his life. He was always going on about it when we were together, yelling at me if I bumped into it or wore something he thought might damage the leather seats. I took a quick peek around to make sure no one would see me, then dug out the keys to my own beat up ride and with deliberation, ran the last couple of bumps over the shiny surface. Once done, I glanced back and sneered with satisfaction at the wavy lines of white sitting about hip height from back fender to front. With another look around, I moved off, tempted to find a place to hide to watch the melt down. Brad might even pass out from the horror it of it all. He'd done so much worse to me. In the scheme of things, this was minor. He could afford to have it repainted. My life, my reputation was in shreds because of him. I knew my actions might seem petty to others. How did one recoup even one hundredth of the pain that sorry excuse for a human caused to others? With a shrug, I managed to find a place where I could observe unseen, ready to run if necessary. Brad's rage would spill over and I almost feared he would hurt anyone he found near his damaged "precious."

[Edited on 02/12/2015 by BelleBayard]
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 12, 2015 07:01
I love this, Belle! I never really understood why someone would even want to key a car, but you make it understandable, even if I would never do or condone something like that either.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: February 12, 2015 07:30
Belle, I really enjoyed your piece. Thank you for contributing! Please do so more often!
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BelleBayard
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on: February 12, 2015 06:57
Thanks! I've missed writing terribly. I had a 100k word novel, historical romance, but it is gone with the 3.5 floppies it was saved on and I think the hard copy was trashed as well. Oh well. Perhaps once I retired from my job I can concentrate on writing again. Appreciate the feedback and will try to chime in more often. And Blueberry, no I wouldn't do it either, but that's why I write - I put myself into my character and look for the motivation that I don't understand initially, but then see where they are coming from.
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 12, 2015 09:18
That's awful, Belle! I hate that you lost all your work. You should definitely chime in more here! & that's a great reason to write; I like to understand characters like that too! Everyone has some sort of motivation, as strange as it may seem (not that yours was strange, but I'm just saying this in general!).
So, I realized it's update day! I have a rough draft of my murder mystery done but still need more editing/revising. It turned out to be only 4 chapters because I dished it out pretty quickly & don't want to get bogged down with trying to figure out who the murderer is since I don't want to do a real world crossover (although having all the neat detective impliments of today woudl be fun, even if I'm clueless about them!). & I got pretty descriptive in some areas! Perhaps what I need to do with all my work is just write it, then go back & put in more descriptive stuff.
I also haven't really touched my other stuff Except, of course, the story I'm writing with Mushu! I need to work on 2 Dwarves still but I don't think I've touched it in about a week I'm having a hard time adjusting to my new work schedule is part of it, so I don't have as much free time (which is probably a good thing!).
Also, at church Wednesday night I spoke with a lady who's probably in her early 50's & she just published her first book! That was pretty neat & I hope it encourages the rest of you that it's never too late to publish your first book! (Unless you're dead, of course lol)
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: February 13, 2015 12:08
Update Day! I completely missed it, and it was my idea!

Due to the musical and severe shoulder pain from playing so much, I have no been writing lately. I wrote my first few pages in days last night, and I will do a few more today. Still in the same notebook, and the same chapter title thingy.

By the way, Blue, many books are published after the authors death. I beleive the Sil was? There are a great many others as well.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
Eruwestiel_Evensong
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on: February 13, 2015 01:20
Here is my response to the prompt. Not wonderful, but it's something!

I watched as the blue Camaro was parked. It was identical to the one driven by Senator Hasumé, which was exactly the point. Agent Larson beckoned me over. "Put the mark right beside the back left tire," he said, indicating the spot. I nodded, key already in hand. It seemed a pity to ruin such a nice paint job, but what was paint when compared to the cost of someone's life? I lifted the key and scratched a small oval with a line running through the middle. When I finished, we took up our positions around the perimeter of the lot. I checked my pistol again to be sure it was loaded and ready. This whole thing - the location, car and special mark - was yet another attempt to capture the "Death Cloaks" as the gang called themselves. But these weren't some belligerent teenagers. These were highly skilled criminals.

We stayed there all night, but no one showed up. I went home in the morning and slept until noon. I was surprised at the level of activity at the office when I arrived thirty minutes later. Agents were scattered everywhere, some making phone calls, others rapidly going through paperwork. "What's going on?" I asked Chief Hendrix. His deep frown told me the news wasn't good.

"Senator Hasumé is dead."
I sucked in a quick breath. "But...how?"
"I don't know. What I do know is that he was found dead in his car an hour or so ago. And there was this mark on it." He held out the picture to me. I stared down at the roughly scratched symbol in the picture. It was just like the fake one I had put on the decoy car last night...Theta, the ancient Greek symbol for death.
"And I dreamed of seas and ships, and of waves crashing on the shore in the twilight of the world..." ~Song, member of the Realm of Ulmo
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 13, 2015 04:30
Yeah, I know a bit about post-mortum (that's right isn't it? Latin for after death) publishing. But then you don't get to enjoy that your book was published! & I wouldn't trust my family to do that for me lol
Wow, Song, I totally love it! You used the keying for a good purpose! I totally love detective kind of things like this lol You should write a whole book based off this.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: February 13, 2015 04:40
Here is my response!

I drive seven miles per hour over the posted speed limit. In the car I stole from my brother. To a place that I swore I would never go to again, not even if I was marched there by sword tip or gunpoint.

Who am I kidding? It would be gunpoint. These people can't stand to do things the messy way. Clean and neat,and quickly, so each and every peice of evidence can be swept under the carpet, or buried six feet deep.

I puton my left hand turn signal, and, with my eyes on the rear view mirror, I swing Adrian's car into the parking lot, turning the lights off.

This is his private residence. Manicured and flawless, just like their world always seemsto be,from the outside. Guilded. That is the perfect word for it. Gold plated to hide the rotted interior.

I park and open my door, turning the car off in the process. There are six cars parked in his driveway, and I have no idea which one is his.Pity. Now I'll need to destroy each one.

I approach the cars and draw my knife. I try to scratch the first word into the door,but it doesn't do a thing. Too dainty. Undefined. I reach into my pocket and pull out Adrian's keys, and I can picture him beside me, urging me on, keeping me safe. Only he is back home, and safe, trying to secure things in Hetrea so Outside doesn't infiltrate. Being King.

The perfect messege comes to mind,and I grip the car key in my fist. I gouge deep grooves into the driver's side, letting my frustration leak out into the damage.

I scrawl the same thing on each car and then walk back to my own- Adrian's own. Shooting pains creep up my wrist from the jarring impact.

I start the car and pull out of the driveway. As I do,the illuminating aura from my headlights shines onto the line of cars.

"Now, it's my turn."

They exploited us. Cheated us. Lied to us.

I don't enjoy being lied to.

Tonight,I am packing us allup. Tommorow, we are sneaking out of Outside,and going back home to Hetrea. I hope I dream tonight. I need to craft my war.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
Nifredil
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on: February 14, 2015 04:41
Hi! can I join you? Some of you might know me already from RPing, but that's not all I like to write. Mostly fantasy and sci-fi, though, with some historical fiction mixed in.

Cheers!
*Nif
We still remember, we who dwell In this far land, beneath the trees The starlight on the Western seas...
In the Realm of Ulmo
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 14, 2015 07:47
Welcome, Nif! I'm Blue. Maxie is our fearless leader & everyone welcomes new people all the time! I love historical fiction too! The 1700's is my favorite era, especially the Revolution. Although the Gold Rush Era can be very interesting too.

Maxie, your prompt is quite intriguing! A whole book based off it would be fascinating. Just curious, where is the setting?
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: February 14, 2015 11:07
Hola, Nif! Glad to see you here!

Song, I really love your prompt. It seems like the prolauge to a murder mystery. Do you think that you'll keep working on it? You can even use the next few prompts to continue on with your book, which is what I have been doing.

Blue, my prompts are always chunks of story that are going to be placed in my four book series, of which two and a half books are written and not even one half of the first book is typed. Sorry that you guys are getting random bits and peices that are in no order for my prompt responses. To keep it brief, I will say that the setting of my book is areverse Narnia- where Narnia would be the "real world" to my characters and what lies outside of that is "fake".

Confusing? It's easier in first person narration. Hetrea, the world I created (check the letters- you can get "Earth" if you scramble the letters and take one out), is where my characters are from. During a civil war that threatens to tear their world apart, they leave their world and go Outside to get help. Outside is the world that we live in...but Darkness either doesn't know or doesn't care about the names and places that we give to our countries, states, etc. So all we get from her is "Somewhere in the East of Outside" or just "Outside" in general.

The prompt I just wrote takes place Outside. I will not say which country I imagined it to take place in, that is the readers job. That was not at all brief, but...

[Edited on 02/14/2015 by findemaxam48]
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 14, 2015 07:16
Ok! Thanks! That actually makes sense. Sounds very fascinating! It also explains why Darkness has such a unique name!
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: February 14, 2015 07:36
I'm so glad that it makes sense! It is always so hard for me to explain things in my writing. Especially good since I will be seeking publication one day.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
findemaxam48
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on: February 16, 2015 12:48
Prompt Number 21:

You sit in the back of an ambulance with a blanket wrapped around your shoulders.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
Mareth_Ravenlock
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on: February 16, 2015 01:14
Hey! Welcome to the thread, Lily and Nif! Good to see you two.

Great prompts, everyone!

I'm actually still working on Prompt 19...I hope to finish it soon, but I don't know when it will be done. It's taken me a long time, obviously, mainly because I get writer's block on it. Which is pathetic, since it's just a prompt. *sigh* Anyway, maybe I will eventually get it done.

But this is a great prompt too, Maxie! I'll be brainstorming about it.

I'm excited to see what everyone else comes up with for this one!
~Llama Warrior of Nessa~ Sometimes, I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast. - Lewis Carrol
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 16, 2015 01:23
I can tell ya'll right now I'll have nothing for this prompt either! Anything to do with medical stuff freaks me out, unless it's a girl nursing a guy back to health after he's been injured in battle. Somehow that's ok lol Anyway, hopefully everyone else will have some ideas! I am pathetic lately.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
findemaxam48
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on: February 16, 2015 02:32
Blue, funny that you say that, I picked this prompy because I thought it might be theraputic for me.

Mareth, take your time! Feel free to post prompts whenever, even if they are really old!
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
Eruwestiel_Evensong
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on: February 16, 2015 03:01
Thanks for the feedback on my prompts! Showing vs. Telling can be very difficult. There really is no pattern to my writing, I just write what comes to mind.

Neither of those prompts were from a book, it was just written for the prompt. But I think I could see them being worked in to a story sometime.

Oh, and I got a book of 300 writing prompts from Barnes & Noble! Some of them look really hard, but I'm sure it would be good practice. I could even do some of them from the point of view of one of my characters if it doesn't apply to my life.

I'll try to come up with something for this prompt soon!
"And I dreamed of seas and ships, and of waves crashing on the shore in the twilight of the world..." ~Song, member of the Realm of Ulmo
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 16, 2015 03:39
Lol that is funny, Maxie! I hope the prompt helps you! I have enough tragedy & gruesomeness in my fanfics for now lol
Song, that book of prompts sounds like a really good idea! I need to work on the descriptive prompts I found; I think you already saw the only one I've done, the one describing Thranduil. You know I struggle with showing versus telling as well! & I also just write whatever comes to mind. That can be both a good & bad thing!
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
BelleBayard
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on: February 16, 2015 04:51
I shivered and sniffed, a bit put out with the whole thing. The blaring siren of the ambulance made counterpoint to my pounding headache. What kind of half-wit tries to skate on a pond that isn't completely frozen over? Only my little brother, that's who. I glared at him, laying on the gurney, but I couldn't maintain my anger. He looked so small, his lips blue with cold as the paramedics worked on him. They probably would have made me go with my folks if I hadn't plunged into the frigid water, trying to save Matt. Blowing a dripping tendril of hair from my left eye, I heaved a sigh.

"Will he be okay?" I asked to no one in particular.

One of the paramedics looked over at me. "Yeah, we just need to get him warmed up. You got him in time. Just have to make sure you're okay as well. Need another blanket?"

I shrugged, pulling the partly sodden thing that smelled like wet sheep around me tighter. "Maybe. I'm still soaking wet."

He grinned and tossed me another wool blanket. "Good thing about wool is even when it's wet, it still helps you stay warm." Fiddling with some controls on the side of the lurching ambulance, he glanced over at me. "Let me know if that helps."

A blast of warmer air blew in my face. I closed my eyes, turning my face toward it. "Oh yeah, that's much better."

"Sis?" Matt's voice, trembling and sounding like he wanted to cry brought me out of my own misery.

"Yeah, munchkin, I'm here. Let's not do that again, okay?" Reaching over, I managed to grab his hand for a quick squeeze to let him know I wasn't mad at him really.

"Promise," he whispered, then closed his eyes again and a tiny smile lifted his slightly less blue lips.

Well, he probably wouldn't do that particular stunt again, but Matt seemed to be a trouble magnet. Amazing the sorts of things he dreamed up to try and test out his theories of the world around him. If he managed to survive his childhood I had no doubt he'd be a genius. Otherwise, he just be another statistic of a kid who met Darwin's theory all too well.

[Edited on 02/16/2015 by BelleBayard]
Nifredil
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on: February 17, 2015 05:02
OK, I am sorry to break up the conversation like this, but... what is a prompt? English is not my first language, so at times there are words and terms whose meaning escapes me.
We still remember, we who dwell In this far land, beneath the trees The starlight on the Western seas...
In the Realm of Ulmo
BelleBayard
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on: February 17, 2015 06:23
A prompt is like an idea to do just that, prompt you to write something that relates to the single sentence or two used. Hope that helps. Yes, English confuses even native speaker so if it's your second language it's really confusing at times.
findemaxam48
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on: February 17, 2015 09:46
Yep! Like an idea starter.
We were one in the same, running like moths to the flame. You'd hang on every word I'd say, but now they only ricochet.
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 17, 2015 06:18
Ok, I have a really weird question: is it normal to get so attached to your character that you can't bear the thought of killing him off? Even though you know he has to die in order for he story to work? I'm suffering severe emotional trauma at the hands of a fictional character over here! Anyone know how to help me? Or do I just need to get over it?
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
BelleBayard
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on: February 17, 2015 07:49
It gets better. I've often wondered how George R. R. Martin can take killing off his great characters (i.e. in Game of Thrones), but sometimes you have to do it in order to have it work. Doesn't mean you don't shed tears, but one thing about it. You can write prequels to show how your character got to where he was at the beginning of the other story.
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 17, 2015 08:00
Thanks! Tomorrow is my big day & I have special ice cream to help me through! Although at this point I think I need more than ice cream...I really have no idea what! & with him, since I know he's going to die, everything up to this point has pretty much broken my heart with almost every single word he says! I'm not sure I could do any more with his back story I totally love him; I loved him before his parents even met, fell in love, & married Which leads to another question: is it normal to love your characters that much?
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
BelleBayard
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on: February 18, 2015 06:28
They are often a part of you as when you write you put your heart and soul into the story's creation. I had a very wonderful character in my book, but as it was a multigenerational saga, he had to die. Was very difficult, but I had to let him go. How I wish I still had that story!
PSK
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on: February 18, 2015 06:44
Hey! This looks good! Can I join in?
"Tears unnumbered ye shall shed; and the Valar will fence Valinor against you, and shut you out, so that not even the echo of your lamentation shall pass over the mountains." ~ The Doom of Mandos
BlueberryMuffins76
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on: February 18, 2015 08:56
Hi PSK! This is the thread I told you you should join!
& Belle, thanks! This is also a multi-generational story, so I guess he would have to die sooner or later. Unfortunately, he has to die sooner rather than later in order for a pairing to work properly & the next story to work. The funny thing is, his father is also a fave character but he'll be fairly old when he dies, so that makes it more bearable somehow. Goodness, this probably sounds like a terribly gruesome tale!
I saw on Pinterest somewhere that your characters are kind of like your children, which is why some of us (points to self) have a hard time even injuring them. As you can probably tell, I've been dreading this death pretty much ever since my character was invented
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13, NIV I'm a fanfiction writer and appreciate reviews! Check me out at https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6434280/BlueberryMuffins76
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