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MerryandPip
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 16, 2005 04:31
**Grins** That one made me smile.
Silivrentolwen
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 16, 2005 07:33


Me to! Heehee.


*heavy sigh*

Still nothing. I hate jokers block! Heehee.
Ilfa
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 17, 2005 12:25
Hey, those two jokes made me laugh! :rolling: Did you made that? well, I think you're a great joker!
Josephine_jfh
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 19, 2005 08:52
Q: What does Merry do for a living?
A: He's a doctor. Merry-a-doc! get it?

Awesome! I've never thought about it.:cheers:
newsgirl
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 19, 2005 04:58
I always thought that joke was so dumb! (well... maybe it is) I'm the editor of a small LotR fan Newsletter. Almost two years ago, I was brainstorming. I needed a few jokes for my newsletter! Then that Merry joke popped into my mind. Nobody who read it in my newsletter really laughed (lol!).
I have a few more jokes that are just far too dumb to post here :rolleyes: . And nobody can make me!!!

I like that joke that Silvertowen (sorry if I misspelled that) posted on the first page of this topic:
'What did Gimli say when Legolas made dinner?
"Nobody tosses a dwarfs salad!"'

That's so funny!


[Edited on 20/6/2005 by newsgirl]
jedi_eowyn
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 20, 2005 07:18
Oh my gosh you guys! These are good! The CoE should go on a comedy tour and tell some of these jokes! I would go to see it! I am not that creative with jokes, but I'll think of some soon, if not I'll tell my friend to post some!
Silivrentolwen
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 21, 2005 06:47
I like that joke that Silvertowen (sorry if I misspelled that) posted on the first page of this topic:
'What did Gimli say when Legolas made dinner?
"Nobody tosses a dwarfs salad!"'


Thanks, newsgirl. Glad you liked it!

Hmmm. . . Thinking. . . can't you smell the smoke? hheeeeheee.

TolkienFreek
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 21, 2005 10:32


Q: What does Merry do for a living?
A: He's a doctor. Merry-a-doc! get it?




No he married a doctor!!

Get it ? Merry-a-doc... Marry-a-doc
oh never mind
newsgirl
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 21, 2005 10:37
Haha! That's great, Tolkienfreek!
[/b]need... more... jokes....[b]
I told my sister a few of these jokes on this thread, and I usually cracked up at the punch line or whatever, so she didn't get them, heehee
MerryandPip
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 22, 2005 02:13
Ditto, Newsgirl. I wish I had more jokes, too.
Josephine_jfh
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 22, 2005 03:06
No he married a doctor!!

Get it ? Merry-a-doc... Marry-a-doc
oh never mind

Hehehe... I love it! Cool!

So the beginning should be:
What does Merry's wife do? or Who's Merry's wife? right?

OK, I got one:
What career is suitable to Gandalf?
Ans: A professor. 'Cause he always say, "You can not pass!"

That's truely happened in Taiwan. A professor mailed his students the film of the "You can not pass!" scene to tell them that they were failed, and notice them to have the make-up exam.
Morna_Child_of_Eru
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 22, 2005 04:20
It's "shall not pass" not "cannot pass" in the movies. That makes more sense with the professor using it as a "hey you need to make up the test" notificiation. That's really funny though. I'd do it if I were a professor.
punk_angel
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 22, 2005 04:32
A professor mailed his students the film of the "You can not pass!" scene to tell them that they were failed, and notice them to have the make-up exam.


That's so awesome! None of my teachers are that cool. outs:

to TolkienFreek and Silivrentolwen: You two rock! And so does anyone else in this thread! I thought I was the only one this corny. Which is a huge compliment.

Keep up the good work!
Silivrentolwen
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 22, 2005 08:01
to TolkienFreek and Silivrentolwen: You two rock!


*bows* Hannon le, mellonnin. Your praise is much appreciated. Now maybe I can get over this block!

Okay, here's the scene for you. Gandalf has just spoken the Black Speech, giving all the elves a headache and scarring the life out of all men and hobbits present.

"Never before has any voice uttered the words of that tounge here in Imladris."

"I do not ask your pardon, Master Eyebrow-- I mean, Master Elrond. "


I try, I really do. *hangs head in shame* :nono:
TolkienFreek
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 22, 2005 10:18
*Bows deeply* im flattered
MerryandPip
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 23, 2005 03:55
I know this is kind of Out-of-Topic, but I could have sworn I heard the Black Speech in my dream last night! **Shudders**
TolkienFreek
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 23, 2005 05:05
lol i once dreamed that i was talking in entish
Josephine_jfh
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 23, 2005 06:24
It's "shall not pass" not "cannot pass" in the movies.


Really? But I've watched EE DVD and checked the English subtitles many times. I remember Gandalf did say "You can not pass." at the moment of hitting the bridge with his sword and stick. However, he also said "You shall not pass." at the beginning of this scene. So I think both are OK.

Anyway, it's still fun. Have you guys ever seen that funny picture of "You cannot pass" sign on the road?
newsgirl
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 23, 2005 10:34
Yes, I saw it! That was so funny. I was thinking I should make a sign like that and put it on my bedroom door. (my mom would probably take it of though...
Silivrentolwen
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 24, 2005 03:45
I was thinking I should make a sign like that and put it on my bedroom door. (my mom would probably take it of though...


I've seen many pictures of that. They made it into a roadway sign, and put a little Gandalf on it, with "You Can Not Pass" written uderneath. I fell out of my chair laughing so hard.
MerryandPip
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 24, 2005 07:45
One time after I watched some of ROTK, I thought about making a sign for my bedroom door that said:

The way is shut.
It was made by those who are dead...And the dead keep it
The way is shut.
(IN OTHER WORDS, KEEP OUT!!)
Josephine_jfh
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 25, 2005 09:19
I've seen many pictures of that. They made it into a roadway sign, and put a little Gandalf on it, with "You Can Not Pass" written uderneath. I fell out of my chair laughing so hard.

Yeah, me too! That Gandalf pattern is sooo cute! Now it's the desktop of my cellphone screen.

I like MerryandPip's idea. Maybe you can quote this line while your dog or something comes, "They have a cave troll!"

[Edited on 25/6/2005 by Josephine_jfh]
Brethil
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 25, 2005 09:37
i'm not funny enough to even pull of the funiest joke ever but i would like to say foolofatook~ where are you?! we need your beebles joke or story, whatever you wanna call it!
*re-jogs memory* *starts laughing uncontrolably*
Ilfa
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 25, 2005 09:33
Oh my! I haven't posted here for a long time! :disco:

Anyway, I have read all the new jokes and I made a whole round of giggles because of that! I think to myself, I'm just a laugh-er not a joker! I can't even think of a joke! :dizzy:
newsgirl
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 26, 2005 11:29
Does anyone here get offened by dumb blonde jokes? I think some of them are mean (I'm no blonde, though). I'm asking Because I think I have a dumb blonde elf joke in my head at present, but I don't want to offend anyone, (or any elves for that matter. Not many are dumb).
TolkienFreek
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 26, 2005 11:49
being a bit of a dumb blonde myself, i find them hilarious
Josephine_jfh
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 26, 2005 03:37
How about dumb Chinese/Japanese jokes? I've seen lots of them in Hollywood movies.

I got it! Since Gandalf/Ian McKellen is the professor of Oxford University, he is the best one to mail students the "You can not pass" scene. Think about the students' face, he he he...

[Edited on 27/6/2005 by Josephine_jfh]
Ilfa
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 26, 2005 11:49
LOL, "you cannot pass" is really funny!:heart:
Silivrentolwen
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 27, 2005 03:48
Does anyone here get offened by dumb blonde jokes?


I'm a brunette, so no problem here. Go right ahead.
Nenthule
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 29, 2005 07:52
One time after I watched some of ROTK, I thought about making a sign for my bedroom door that said:

The way is shut.
It was made by those who are dead...And the dead keep it
The way is shut.
(IN OTHER WORDS, KEEP OUT!!)


I put a sign on my sister's door saying:
There is evil here that does not sleep

She hasn't taken it down!!! :evil:


[Edited on 29/6/2005 by Nenthule]
Rulea
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 29, 2005 03:20
Hears an LOTtr joke I heard on Bagginses.com >tribute to laugh of the Rings> Jokes 2. And its a dumb blonde one.

Strider and 10 blonde elves were holding onto a rope strung across an enormous chasm. The rope was starting to break and would hold if one person's weight was off the rope. Strider decided to throw himself valantly into the chasm."I will jump and save you all," he said. The blonde elves clapped.
Image
newsgirl
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 29, 2005 07:32
that is sooooo funny! My sis and I laughed our heads off when we read it! Thats great!!

Ok, here's my dumb blonde elf joke:

ooh, i gotta go, my brothers buggin me to get off
Josephine_jfh
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 29, 2005 07:46
Hahaha...Myusernamerulea, that sounds like the "Hunter VS the birds on the tree/pole" jokes.
ABagginsOfTheShire
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: June 29, 2005 08:41
I got his from Bagginses.com too...

"Sam, Pippin, and Frodo enter themselves in the Book of Middle Earthen Records. Sam enters himself for smallest feet, Pippin enters himself for smallest legs, and Frodo enters himself for smallest brain. In a few weeks, a letter comes by Shire-post to each hobbit. Sam opens his and says, "Hurray, I have the smallest feet in the world!" Pippin opens his and says, "Hurray, I have the smallest legs in the world!" Frodo opens his, looks disgusted, throws it on the ground and stomps on the letter while screaming, "Who the hell is Legolas?!?!"


No offence to Leggy fans, I like Leggy too.

And...

A blonde woman in Rohan had two horses, but she couldn’t tell them apart. So she asked her hobbit neighbor for advice. He suggested that she cut the tail off one of the horses.This worked until the other horse snagged his tail on a fence accidentally cutting his tail off.So the neighbor suggested notching one of the horses’ ear. This worked until the other horse snagged his ear on a fence accidentally notching his ear. So the neighbor suggested measuring the heights of the horses.And sure enough, the white horse was two inches taller than the black horse.



Ilfa
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Post RE: LOTR jokes
on: July 01, 2005 12:30
LOL, all of those were funny! :rolling:
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